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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wish people would use carseats and strap their children into cars!

45 replies

HappierThanEverBefore · 17/11/2014 23:59

Bit of a rant I guess

Recently I've been on the road a fair bit and am quite shocked at the amount of children Ive seen in cars without carseats (clearly need one), sat on adults lap (adult strapped in child not) or just 'jumping' around the car! The best bit about it is most the time the driver is wearing their seatbelt!

How hard/time consuming is it to strap the child into a car seat or make sure they have their belt on?

I understand there are some occasions ie taxis that it's not possible but most of these weren't taxis Hmm

Probably going to get a flaming for this but needed to rant as it's been on my mind!

OP posts:
BabyDubsEverywhere · 18/11/2014 00:01

I haven't seen this since the very early 90's... where do you live??

Original poster
HappierThanEverBefore · 18/11/2014 00:02

South East about 25 miles out of London. I have travelled a fair bit in the last week so been to quite a few places.

OP posts:
Purplepixiedust · 18/11/2014 00:04

I have never seen this either. In fact there is always great effiort among people I know to beg/borrow appropriate extra car seats when giving lifts to extra kids.

madamginger · 18/11/2014 00:10

Funnily enough there is a mum at my DC school who's 3 year old is still in an infant rear facing car seat turned the other way round.Shock
She straps him in with the seatbelt and it looks really dangerous. I've seen the child lean forward and the whole seat move with him.
I really really want to say something but she is foreign and I don't think she speaks much English.

mymummademelistentoshitmusic · 18/11/2014 00:12

It's a common sight here, sadly.

Original poster
HappierThanEverBefore · 18/11/2014 00:13

In my local town there's hardly any of it but I travelled 5 miles to the next big town and there was loads & also travelled 6 miles in the other direction and saw it quite a bit.

OP posts:
Original poster
HappierThanEverBefore · 18/11/2014 00:16

Those 2 towns mentioned in Previous post were the closer where I noticed it a lot.

Also travelled up to 80 miles away in different directions and saw it a lot

OP posts:
Oldraver · 18/11/2014 00:17

I see it a lot back home where my Mum lives. I've also recently seen someone dump a toddler in a Group 1 then jump in the front...there was no way the toddler was going to be able to fasten themselves in and they were standing between the seats by the time they pulled off.

The ones I have seen do seem to be people who dont speak English as a first language. I wonder if its just not something thought of as necessary in other countries like here 25 odd years ago

honeysucklejasmine · 18/11/2014 00:23

Apparently my twin and i were transported in a drawer, from a big cabinet, on the back seat. Of course, cars and traffic have moved on hugely now... Car seats are an absolute must.

Never see children not strapped down. Quite the opposite. An acquaintance of mine had their baby in a group 0 car seat for about 3 hours yesterday, with only the occasional removal for a feed. Shock I don't have dc yet but thought the max was supposed to be 30 mins?!

Original poster
HappierThanEverBefore · 18/11/2014 00:31

I do agree that years ago people survived without car seats and belts but as you say times have moved on and there's a lot more traffic on the roads.

I'm on the understanding it's half hour for newborn to 6months ish then 2 hours after that - I could be wrong

OP posts:
MyNameIsInigoMontoya · 18/11/2014 00:36

I saw a woman holding a tiny baby in her arms in a peoplecarrier the other day. Saw them come into the supermarket car park so I thought maybe she'd just taken the baby out of the seat in the car park, but no, I saw the same car driving off again just afterwards still with the baby in her arms Sad

batteryhen · 18/11/2014 00:48

I live abroad and no child here is ever strapped in. I find it very hypocritical when the locals declare how much they love children yet they let their toddlers bounce around the back and front seats without being strapped in. The other day I saw a man driving with a baby on his knee and texting at the same time. He had his seatbelt on though, obviously he wouldn't want to get hurt........

sneepy · 18/11/2014 07:14

I once saw a woman drive up to a playground in a small white builders van. She got out, opened the back and about 6 small boys tumbled out.

OwlCapone · 18/11/2014 07:18

I do agree that years ago people survived without car seats and belts

Well, no they didn't, they died in car accidents. The people who survived were those who didn't have car accidents (or had the "wrong sort" of car accident IYSWIM)

I grew up in the 70s - no rear seatbelts or car seats and I remember being allowed to climb over into the front bench seat of our first family car. I survived because we didn't have a car accident.

OwlCapone · 18/11/2014 07:19

I very rarely see children not correctly seated in cars now though. I don't think I've spotted one for a good few years.

Sirzy · 18/11/2014 07:21

Most children here seem to he strapped in but there seems to be some sort of race to forward facing and then booster seats! There were children at DS pre school last year who no way did they weigh 15kg yet were on a booster cushion in the car!

EatDessertFirst · 18/11/2014 07:22

Its pretty common round here. SE too. Drives me nuts.

IHopeYouStepOnALegoPiece · 18/11/2014 08:47

I haven't seen poor car seat skills for ages...though the last one was serious enough that I called the police there and then

some absolute fucking moron had a bike trailer attached to the tow bar at the back with a child in. ..I mean, honest to god, are people that thick REALLY?!

Missrabbitshouldjoinaunion · 18/11/2014 08:58

YANBU.

I also wish people would catch on to the message that coats in car seats are dangerous. I always look like a terrible mother taking my 2 year old into nursery just wearing a jumper and carrying his coat, but I know I'm in the right really.

I just don't understand why these safety messages don't catch on!

Wincher · 18/11/2014 08:59

Where I live in London I see this all the time - once you start looking, you see it all over. EVery time I go to the supermarket I see cars pulling up with adults with kids on their laps, four kids on the back seat, kids standing up on the back seat while the car is moving etc.

In my road for a while there was a car with two seats in it that I think were the pushchair seats from an iCandy. They certainly weren't car seats. I kept wondering whether I should report it to the police, but I didn't actually see kids in it. The parents were obviously trying to be safe - but failing.

speedbird17 · 18/11/2014 09:03

MissRabbit a massive vote of solidarity here, always take off DD's coat before leaving nursery and they look at me like I'm insane but there is no way I'm putting her in the seat with a big coat on! Turn the heating up in the car and voila, warm toasty child!

Missrabbitshouldjoinaunion · 18/11/2014 09:08

It's such a horrible feeling though isn't it speedbird I always feel like I need to justify! In the very cold winter days I pre-warm DS's seat with a hot water bottle and he has a blanket over him, but I still feel like I'm being judged by other parents! But I don't like wearing coats in the car either - I find them very uncomfortable to drive in!

sashh · 18/11/2014 09:09

I think there is something to be said about it being cultural. But not entirely. my next door neighbours never used a seat with their (sort of - long story) daughter. One of them would sit in the back with her on their knee. She is 11 now and tall for her age so doesn't need the seat.

My dad had a volvo that did have rear seats, we used them on holiday in France because it was the law but when we got back in the car at Dover we didn't.

I think it is things like this that should be on the citizenship test. Things like this, minimum wage, working hours etc etc.

I had the TV on yesterday, it came on as some police reality show, they had stopped a car with 11 people in it, the driver laughed.

It turned out he was driving 1.5 miles from a party home but the children were tired so 5 adults sat in the seats with 6 children on knees, in the front foot well etc.

hellyhants · 18/11/2014 09:14

I've never seen this. What I do see quite often is quite little kids in the front seat (strapped in). I wasn't allowed to sit in the front until I was about 12 and have followed the same guideline for my son (who is 12 this week). I don't know if it's really a safety issue or my mum just thought it was safer to be in the back.

BertieBotts · 18/11/2014 09:17

I saw loads of kids unrestrained, in inappropriate car seats etc in Leamington Spa. Okay it was the "deprived" side rather than the leafy middle class side but still! One mum at DS' nursery had her 3 year old sat in the back every day with no seatbelt let alone car seat. My childminder used a high backed booster for a small 2 year old. One of DS' friends used to travel around main roads clinging to his stepfather's neck on a bicycle, neither of them wearing a helmet!

XP once picked up DS in a friend's car, friends were expecting their first baby and said "Oh we've got a 0-3 years car seat he can use" not realising that it was an infant car seat, they'd strapped it in totally the wrong way around, DS was about 18 months old and his whole head poked over the top. XP was insistent it would be fine and in hindsight, I should have asked them to stay put for 5 minutes and I'd have gone and got his usual car seat but I don't know how I would have got it back and I didn't think of it until I got back in the house and they'd already left!

The coat thing I cringe about but I think people just don't realise rather than not caring. I see a lot of people with the straps far too loose as well. But not using car seats/using the wrong car seats is just lack of common sense.