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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not want to go to Christmas work enforced fun

79 replies

honeyistoosweet · 15/11/2014 20:25

This year my office has decided on a daytime Christmas party.

My department has decided to host our annual Christmas lunch the same day. So from 12-1pm on said day our team are heading out for a three course meal to then return to join the rest of the office for the rest of afternoon in the conference room for the 'party' until 5.30 home time.

Normally, after the department meal we would be allowed a half day and to head off home.

The office party is no alcohol and from what I understand is just food.

Im irritated that it feels like food food food all day long and I'm overly sensitive to this as I have an eating problem and will really really struggle with the day as is. And secondly, surely we we should be able to choose whether we attend the Christmas do? Or is that not how it goes?

On writing this I think it's probably just my food issues clouding my judgement but I feel it's a bit silly going for a full on meal to then go back for another party spread.

OP posts:

NoArmaniNoPunani · 15/11/2014 20:27

If you're having a 3 course meal from 1pm it'll probably stretch out a few hours. Just have a few drinks and make your excuses after the meal.

Pippidoeswhatshewants · 15/11/2014 20:28

What a shame that you'll be having this horrible cold on the day of your Christmas parties

JuniperTisane · 15/11/2014 20:29

How the hell are you expected to eat 3 courses between 12 and 1pm?

rookiemater · 15/11/2014 20:33

Sounds a bit weird tbh. If your lunch out is at 12 and it's 3 courses with a bit of alchohol then you're unlikely to be back to the office much before 4.

I wouldn't be eating anything at that point either and I am fairly greedy and have no food issues. it's disappointing that you lose out on a a couple of hours off, but as your time is paid for, you just need to go along and see what it's all about.

I have to say I much prefer office dos to be at lunchtime, means I go along, get merry and then head home by 7 with no hangover the next day. I'm too old to be trying to get taxis at midnight or hang out in crowded pubs.

MorrisZapp · 15/11/2014 20:36

Exactly what rookie said. My work do a Xmas lunch and I love it. Great meal, plenty booze, bit of silly behaviour and then home on public transport and tucked up with a cuppa by 9pm. Lush.

manchestermummy · 15/11/2014 20:42

YANBU. I avoid office dos every year and this year will be no exception. I hate forced jollity am I not exactly feeling the love from some colleagues at the minute. Besides which, I am not particularly local, public transport is tricky so it's forced sober jollity at that.

It will be a dc's nativity that day. I can say with certainty.

ILovePud · 15/11/2014 20:51

My sociopathic blunt colleague said she wouldn't come to our work's Christmas do this year because and I quote "it's just the same bunch of cunts I have to put up with all year except with silly hats on".

Original poster

honeyistoosweet · 15/11/2014 20:51

It is a tad stupid. All I know is, we've been told we HAVE to be back by 1pm as that's what time the 'lunch' office shindig begins. So maybe three courses might just be one... (phew!)

OP posts:

Pensionerpeep · 15/11/2014 20:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LadyLuck10 · 15/11/2014 21:00

So just go and don't eat anything if you don't want to. They are hardly going to force feed you. Nothing to be so in a dilemma over.

ovaryhill · 15/11/2014 21:00

Ilovepud, I love your colleague! That made me laugh

LaurieFairyCake · 15/11/2014 21:02

But you're getting paid to be at work?

And this 'work' day consists of scoffing and chatting

Is there no God ?!?

ilovesooty · 15/11/2014 21:05

If you're getting paid for the time you spend it as the company tell you to.
If you don't want to go book a day of annual leave.

AlpacaPicnic · 15/11/2014 21:05

You need to employ the old 'jacket in the back of the chair' trick... Make sure it's a jacket you don't mind losing, just in case.

Or (option B) Take a good book and hide away, occasionally walking with purpose through the room to the loos or vice versa.

People will assume you are there but somewhere else, in a different room.

MsBug · 15/11/2014 21:06

I would spend the hour drinking solidly - it will make the afternoon party seem so much more entertaining

Ilovepud I think I'm in love with your colleague

JuniperTisane · 15/11/2014 21:08

I would be drunk in the corner with MsBug.

Also, I would eat very slowly and perhaps only finish my starter by 1pm, thereby leaving room for party food.

Original poster

honeyistoosweet · 15/11/2014 21:09

Yes I am being paid to be there. I understand this point of view entirely. It's just I have anorexia and the thought of this day is giving me crippling anxiety! I am not allowed to take annual leave on party day unfortunately. I will get through it - I just think it's stupid having a meal and then a lunch party.

OP posts:

Original poster

honeyistoosweet · 15/11/2014 21:10

I like the last few suggestions greatly

OP posts:

Silverdaisy · 15/11/2014 21:12

Lucky you, I'd love to have this afternoon. I always go to work evenings and enjoy them (but would rather stay at home). - added to that i am invited to partners christmas do also.

ILovePud · 15/11/2014 21:13

Sorry just realised half my post vanished, I meant to say you could take a leaf out of my colleague's book as nobody is trying to persuade her to come now. She's a bit of a marmite character but does come out with some funny things. OP, I think your work's planned do sounds ott, who wants a buffet after a speed eaten three course meal?

Silverdaisy · 15/11/2014 21:17

Sorry, I was writing when you wrote - food/anxiety issues added to the mix chNges things. People won't notice what you do or don't eat.

VoyagesOfAStarship · 15/11/2014 21:26

Oh poor you, I really sympathise. I don't feel like that about food so much but I definitely do about enforced parties. I go to one christmas party but it's completely voluntary and just a group of friends who work in the same field. When I worked in an office I used to hate them.

What I would do is "look forward" to the parties, chat about them with mucho interest and excitement, and then on the day have a stomach bug/flu/terrible migraine as appropriate, oh no you are soooo sorry you can't make it. It's not as if you'll miss important work, and it's a stressful situation for you that you shouldn't have to go to IMO. Spend the day looking after yourself and relaxing.

rookiemater · 15/11/2014 21:35

Actually thinking about it, I hate dos where the main focus is drink. I can't stand evenings in the pub, so the idea of having an afternoon thing with no alcohol sounds good to me.

MorrisZapp · 15/11/2014 22:01

What's the jacket on the back of the chair trick?

Osirus · 15/11/2014 22:30

I'm going to two work Christmas parties (evening) throughout December and then our main do is just before Christmas, this one being during the day. I can handle socialising with my immediate colleagues but I hate the day event with all branches involved. I always book the day off!

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