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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Aibu to pick my own name in the secret santa

37 replies

drbonnieblossman · 13/11/2014 13:09

Organising the work secret Santa. The agreed amount is £10. Would I be unreasonable to pick my own name so I can buy myself something I like rather than get something which will go straight into the drawer for school fairs etc. I would make sure my surprised and delighted face had been honed, of course!

OP posts:

ZanyMobster · 13/11/2014 13:12

I wish I could pick my name, I always spend a lot of time choosing secret santa gifts and try to find something more expensive that is half price or whatever. The last gift I got was cheap old toiletries that were probably regifted. I know that sounds a bit selfish but the whole point in giving gifts is to put effort in buying them, that is the bit I love the most although appreciate I am unreasonable expecting the same of others

ZanyMobster · 13/11/2014 13:13

I wish I could pick my name, I always spend a lot of time choosing secret santa gifts and try to find something more expensive that is half price or whatever. The last gift I got was cheap old toiletries that were probably regifted by them. I know that sounds a bit selfish but the whole point in giving gifts is to put effort in buying them, that is the bit I love the most although appreciate I am unreasonable expecting the same of others

ZanyMobster · 13/11/2014 13:13

oops

VacantExpression · 13/11/2014 13:14

Go for it Bonnie I completely agree, having put lots more effort into Secret Santa presents than the ones bought for me over the last 10 years or so. Just make sure your acting is Oscar-worthy!

Original poster

drbonnieblossman · 13/11/2014 13:19

That's how I feel zany - a little bit disgruntled that i always buy something with thought, and listen out to get ideas and then get £2 of tat. I know it's the thought that counts but everyone who goes in for it has the opportunity to opt out because I know it's an expensive time.

Also, I've seen a beautiful corsage that is a little more than the budget but it's beautiful and I'm sure I could do the "wow, someone knows me really well, I LOVE it"

OP posts:

DeWee · 13/11/2014 13:27

I gave dh something once that I'd won on a tombola for his secret santa when he'd forgotten until the last minute. It was rather nice, but just not something I'd ever use.
He was very embarrassed when all the ladies were all over it, and comments were made how it must have cost more (5) than they allowed. To be quite fair, his firm has the majority are geeky men, who are more likely to buy a whoopee cushion if they think they're funny, or a book describing in detail every car that has ever driven on a UK road, if they are trying to get something they think you'll really want.

Tanaqui · 13/11/2014 15:31

I got given my name (had been picked from a hat or something) and would have been super hassle to redo, so I didn't let on and it was lovely! If anyone worked it out they didn't say.

Original poster

drbonnieblossman · 13/11/2014 16:35

I ordered it! And have saved myself smiling through gritted teeth.

OP posts:

whois · 13/11/2014 16:44

Not U, that's the bonus or organising the work secret Santa!

Scholes34 · 13/11/2014 16:47

I picked myself one year. Bought myself something I wanted. That was good, but did feel I'd missed out on the excitement and expectation, even though the secret sants gifts don't often meet up to expectations. Also missed out on buying a nice and thoughtful present for someone else.

Do it once and you're not likely to want to do it again!

MissMogwi · 13/11/2014 16:49

I'd love to pick my own name out. We get told to put our own name back in but sod that.

Although last year I got a bottle of Baileys and a scratch card, so I was made up. Boozey gambler that's me

ZingOfSeven · 13/11/2014 17:18

do it. why not. but make sure you act surprised!

Original poster

drbonnieblossman · 13/11/2014 17:53

Glad to see I'm not alone on this. I wasn't sure if it was a bit bah humbug!

OP posts:

TheHorseHasBolted · 14/11/2014 18:22

Are you talking about somehow fixing it so that you definitely get your own name, or just keeping it if you happen to get it?

In my first Christmas at my current job I genuinely accidentally picked my own name and I explained what had happened and put it back. I've always slightly regretted it - it would have been a good chance to engineer a situation where I people could see what sort of things I really like. Having said that, I've had a few presents from there that were quite thoughtfully chosen so they must have quite a good idea of my tastes by now.

I don't think I would deliberately take my own name if I had a chance to do so, but if no-one will ever know and your colleagues have a habit of giving you unsuitable presents, it won't do anyone any harm.

Original poster

drbonnieblossman · 14/11/2014 18:44

horse what I was thinking was when I put the little slips of paper with all the names on into the hat, I'll just not bother to add my own.

I don't have many gifts at Christmas, and i know that's really not the end of the world but you know, if I can have something lovely then that would be great.

OP posts:

DazzleII · 15/11/2014 00:48

I'm glad I'm not the only one to have this thought. It makes me mad to chuck tat straight in the bin. Not sure if my acting is up to it, though.

ILovedYouYesterday · 15/11/2014 02:08

Do it

daisychain01 · 15/11/2014 02:22

Drbonnie, yes it's being absolutely bah humbug, it's a must this time of year

I would definitely pick my own name, everyone else's taste is crap (think plastic tatt, box of cheap biscuits, dodgy toiletries), Gruesome!

I can remember one year when my luck was in. We had a Japanese member of staff seconded to our office and he must have picked my name because I got the most beautiful miniature Japanese plate and stand, I still have it! They do gifts very well, it's a cultural thing (only give something away that you would treasure yourself).

bloodyteenagers · 15/11/2014 02:33

My place got round choosing your own name.
We have a fiver limit. The fiver is what you spent not rrp so makes it really interesting.
You buy and wrap the gift.
You bring in the gift and add it to the pile and add your name to a list.
So on the day all the gifts are now in a huge tombola and you have to rummage for something. The first thing u touch u take.
Everyone makes an effort to buy something that's not cheap tat

sunflower49 · 15/11/2014 02:50

I'd do it. I am jaded about secret Santa. I've only done it twice, at two separate work places.

First one, new guy, agreed to it but then when I was the only person who didn't have a gift he said he had forgotten and would bring it in tomorrow, then he was off, then it was after the xmas holidays and forgotten about.

Second time, same sort of thing apart from he wasn't new and didn't say he'd forgotten, just said he 'didn't have time'.
CBA with it, now! (Bitter and twisted, moi)

Lovely idea Secret Santa, but only if everyone involved actually GETS involved!

ilovesooty · 15/11/2014 07:35

The secret santa is the only present I get anyway so I wouldn't have much fun if I engineered it to get what I'd bought. I spend a lot of time choosing for someone else and as we know each other pretty well there isn't a lot of tat. For example my recipient last year got a nice pair of earrings and the one before who travels a lot got luggage cube organisers and she seemed thrilled with them.

ilovesooty · 15/11/2014 07:40

I should add thatthey eweren't random earrings - she had lost one earlier in the year and I managed to find a replacement match.

scarlettsmummy2 · 15/11/2014 07:44

We aren't doing secret Santa this year thank god! We are just giving a donation to the local food bank instead. I think it's a much better idea to be honest.

BendyMum15 · 15/11/2014 07:56

One year my husband (then fiance) and I worked in the same place and I picked out his name and then discovered that he had picked out mine. Can't remember what it was though.

InMySpareTime · 15/11/2014 08:05

Sunflower, in your situation I would have probably thrown a terribly uncharitable hissy fit and stolen "didn't have time" guy's gift so I had something! If he CBA to join the secret Santa he shouldn't get the benefit either Depends what the gift he got was though

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