To think some words don't belong in informal conversation

[Thrif]

There are certain words that, whilst technically correct, make a person sound completely up themselves when used out loud.

Whom is the worst. Whilst is another

If I consciously chose to stop using the word whom out loud, wouldn't that be rather patronising to whomever I was talking to? it would be like I was thinking they were too fick to understand me.

Oh... la, de, da!

I suppose it has it's place, sparechange... But to the best of my recollection the classroom had two doors and the lady who'd swallowed a dictionary had followed her four year old through the wrong one
She was very easily discombobulated...

Connected to the me/I issue... There is a woman at work who never uses the word "me" in conversation, it's always "myself" . I suspect that she thinks it draws attention to her, making her sound 'posh' and 'educated', whereas really all she is doing is highlighting her ignorance of correct speech...

I adore the words 'salubrious' and 'insalubrious'. There's an actual, real street in Swansea called Salubrious Passage... Brilliant

Tad is formal language? Since when? Thence, yes (although I'd call it deliberately old-fashioned) and salubrious, yes, but not tad.

Gone are "a little", "slightly", "a bit"; it's all tads nowadays. Often when you see it in print it is, as in Mrs Harkess's use, alongside some more educated diction.
www.theguardian.com/g2/story/0,3604,822140,00.html

Don't start on the reaching out stuff. I have to go to a management seminar tomorrow about 'managing' and it will be wall to wall with that kind of thing. I'm going to be playing Bollocks Bingo as it is...

Of course they belong, if the person speaking them wants to use them. What is with all the criticism of people who speak properly? Is it old fashioned inverse snobbery? Or an insecurity on the part of the one criticising, that their own language skills are sub-par?

Verily, thou art correct.

yy about the police speak thing! My uncle does that and I can't understand a word he says!
also I say "me and my DP went to town", "me and x are going for a drink", none of that "x and I/me" crap.

I had to look up 'phatic communication'. .

Thank you for the me and I explanations.
What about the putting yourself last bit though? 'The present is from me and Bob' sounds more natural than 'Bob and me'.

everyday's a school day on mn

YABU.

Inverted snobbery is for idiots, and as a person who's experienced this attitude for others, I can see no justification for deciding someone else is "up themselves" for being what and who they are.

It is actually the perpetrator of the "inverted snobbery" who wishes to control the terms of communication, and sees their own values and tastes as more important than other people's freedom to express themselves.

it's due to idiotic attitudes like this that the english language is shrinking. Words are dying at a much higher rate than new ones are appearing. It appears anyone with a rich lexicon is now "up-themselves" and pretentious and wankers etc.
It's a bizarre, nonsensical attitude.

Monsters I think it's correct to put Bob first just out of general politeness.

I may be wrong though.

I disagree with the OP but this is a fabulous thread!

I'm from the generation (explained on another MN thread a while ago) that was not expressly taught grammar and so some of the clarifications here are really helpful.

I rather think Thrif, that your post says more about you than it does others. I am not in the least bit 'up myself' (other mumsnetters have met me). I do however speak well, in both formal and less formal situations. Perhaps you feel it's intimidatory?

SanFairy Reported your post.

I was in a shoe shop with DD a few weeks ago and there were a couple of DCs playing up a bit. Their mother (I presume) have them a death stare and told them to "Desist immediately!" I think I might adopt it myself - just sounds more authorative than "Stop it right now!"

I love the use of non common words my old boss would have a word a week he would try to work into client conversations (egregious was one I remember). Poor man is in prison now I do wonder if he is increasing his co prisoners vocabularies.

Also like police speak because it is hilarious.

What I can't stand is the "myself" brigade thinking they sound professional but actually sounding badly educated

discombobulated isn't posh or formal! It's silly, deliberately poking fun at yourself (or oneself if you prefer more formal speech).

wtf dawndonna?

its a pretty well recognised aspect of aspergers/autism. half my family talk like that. but yeah, guess its better that people just think they are 'up themselves' hey?!?

I think Dawndonna leapt to the conclusion that you were being prejudiced against people with Aspergers. Sadly.