To think DH is being selfish?

[startwig1982]

Last night wasn't a great night for any of us. Ds(3) was up twice and dd(11weeks) was up once.
Ds first came in at 2.30am so I told him he had to go back to bed and who did he want to put him in bed? He said mummy so fair enough, I went and settled him back in bed. DH, meanwhile, got up and went to the toilet.
Then ds came in again at 4.30am. This time he wanted daddy so I woke DH up and asked him to put ds back in bed. He did but it took him a lot longer as ds plays him up.
I know asking ds who he wants can be pandering to him but as dd is also in our room and I didn't want her woken, it's easier to do this.

Anyway, fast forward to this morning when we're all awake at a reasonable time, dh says to me 'please could you not wake me up in the middle of the night as I was sleeping heavily and I don't want to be disturbed'. He doesn't work weekends and as far as I can tell he just doesn't want to get up with the children during the night especially as I'm already awake. Is it just me or is he being ur and a bit of an arse ?

Though this probably isn't a huge issue if OP's eldest doesn't normally wake in the night, some of these responses really make my blood boil!

OP is the lighter sleeper therefore must deal with all the night wakings, all week for both children? This caused many an argument with me and my ex. Yes, he was the heavier sleeper but he also used to ignore DD knowing I'd wake up soon. And had the gall to get up for the loo as soon as I was awake and dealing with DD.

Give him one night a week where he does all night wakings and also gets up in the morning. He WILL wake up. If you weren't there, he'd have to. What's happening is he's hearing your DS then consciously recognising that if he doesn't move, you'll have to, then going back to sleep once he knows you're dealing with it.

YANBU. You should take it in turns. If he works during the week and you don't then it's fair enough to let him sleep., but at the weekends you should take turns. He does wake, by the way, he's just choosing to leave it up to you to deal with the children.

Having had a fairly large row discussion about this, DH is going to take ds out this afternoon so dd and I can nap. He's really not that bad but things always seem rubbish when I'm tired! Thank you for all the responses, I feel a bit better about things now than earlier.