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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to want somewhere to live that feels friendly, and a bit free?

45 replies

SparkyLark · 07/11/2014 17:15

I live somewhere lovely nature-wise, but rather cold and unfriendly in other ways.

Anyone move somewhere 'friendly', and did it make a difference?

OP posts:
ClawHandsIfYouBelieveInFreaks · 07/11/2014 20:17

I live in a friendly area. Small Cheshire village. It's got a mix of incomes and a nice community feel to it. Rural but close to city too.

TinklyLittleLaugh · 07/11/2014 22:18

I live in a very uncliquey Lancashire village; proper community spirit, reasonably priced houses, great schools. We moved here from the nearby town 8 years ago and everyone was very welcoming. I wish we hadn't spent 9 years in that town.

wobblyweebles · 08/11/2014 00:34

Yes, where I live is very friendly. It's called America Grin

generaltilney · 08/11/2014 00:43

I live in a city that is notoriously unfriendly apparently, but I live in a small collection of streets that to me is very friendly (though I've never lived outside the south of England so probably have low standards in that regard...) I have made more proper friends here than ever before or am likely to again. It has revolutionised my life.

HicDraconis · 08/11/2014 01:01

I live in rural NZ. It's very friendly, lovely scenery, free outdoors feel. I'd never move back to the UK now.

butterfliesinmytummy · 08/11/2014 01:19

Yup, America here too, land of the free and very friendly.

Thewrongmans · 08/11/2014 01:41

Whereabouts in America? The northeast isn't friendly...or the Midwest... And the rest is very very false and superficially friendly. East London, however, is very friendly.

Notmeagain1 · 08/11/2014 01:52

Im in America too. A littl rural town in North Carolina. An hour to the Blue Ridge Parkway and 3 hrs to the coast. Love it. Just have to be able to say "hey" and "y'all" to fit in. People actually wave to say "hey" and are not meaning "fuck off" (mostly). Grin

MrsTerrorPratchett · 08/11/2014 01:59

Liverpool was lovely and friendly. Milan wasn't. London is, oddly. West coast of Canada isn't, also oddly.

Nandocushion · 08/11/2014 02:05

America here too. I have only lived in three cities in my life, and the other two were in Canada and England. This is far and away the friendliest place I've ever lived, and the most genuine. Which makes up for a lot of the other stuff Smile.

wobblyweebles · 08/11/2014 02:23

Whereabouts in America? The northeast isn't friendly...or the Midwest... And the rest is very very false and superficially friendly

yawn

wobblyweebles · 08/11/2014 02:24

BTW, I live in the northeast and I used to live in the midwest. Have also lived on the west coast.

WhereDoAllTheCalculatorsGo · 08/11/2014 02:38

I'm in Florida. Very friendly :)

nooka · 08/11/2014 02:40

West coast Canada here, both beautiful and friendly. I think that the beauty helps with the friendliness, as most people live here because they want to. Also it's such a young province that few places have the concept of 'incomers' my town just celebrated 200 years, but has more than doubled in a generation so most people have come from somewhere else. Many have immigrants a generation of two back so again a shared experience.

It makes a huge difference, it's a very relaxed place. But I'd say that's probably true of lots of places.

CheerfulYank · 08/11/2014 02:46

How very dare you! :o I've lived in the American Midwest my entire life and we are as friendly as a dog to someone with a pork chop in his pocket.

butterfliesinmytummy · 08/11/2014 04:02

Love your turn of phrase Yank.

I'm in Texas, we are super friendly y'all, you can't pass someone in the street in my neighborhood without a greeting. Used to live in Asia (for nearly 10 years) and found it to be very unfriendly.

Thewrongmans · 08/11/2014 04:02

Friendly if it is all you have known. I didn't think so.

Thewrongmans · 08/11/2014 04:04

Good analogy cheerfulyank! Friendly if you can get something from it Grin

JanetSnakehole · 08/11/2014 04:15

I live in the friendliest city in America. Conde Nast said it was, so it must be true Grin

HoundoftheBaskervilles · 08/11/2014 04:19

I think there's 'types' of friendly, I'm originally from the north of England & from a city that is known for being friendly, & having lived in many other places, it's true, it's a very friendly city, really, truly, friendly, as in you could go out for an evening and make some friends that you'll contact & see again, a genuinely warm & open place.

I've also lived in other places that are perceived as being friendly but actually aren't, people may be superficially friendly but have no intention of following up on all the blather.

And where I live now is very beautiful but very cliquey, if you are judged & found wanting? Then fuck you very much, all very nicely, of course.

FWIW, we lived in Ohio for two years in the 70's and had nothing but good and friendly experiences (although they had some strange ideas about the English).

nooka · 08/11/2014 04:24

I'm originally a Londoner and I found New Yorkers very friendly when we lived there, and people from New Jersey were very welcoming when we lived there for a bit too. We have a good friend from Minneapolis and if we ever considered moving back to the US then that would be a place we'd think about. Actually I don't think Londoners are that unfriendly either.

Lots of friendly places in the world really. The difference is I think that some places are quite stressful to live in, and stressful places lead to people having less time for passing chatting. Where we live now no one is hurried and so people talk tend to each other in situations where they would otherwise be rushing on. This can be a bit annoying at times! Today I had only a few minutes to deposit a cheque and could have done without every customer in front of me having a nice chat with the cashier (although usually I'd do the same).

HoundoftheBaskervilles · 08/11/2014 04:50

Having lived in London Nooka, I think Londoners are pretty friendly, as are native New Yorkers probably, I think the problem with major cities is that people move there to show that 'They Mean Business' and so have to be in perpetually irritated motion in order to demonstrate that, and if the boy from Stoke who's ekeing a living as a runner and living in a shite-hole on the periphery can demonstrate his superior ability with an Oyster Card whilst mocking the tourists, well, he's going to take what he can to earn his urban stripes, isn't he?

Original poster
SparkyLark · 08/11/2014 09:03

Interesting about the States, which I've always been very attracted to, I've always got the friendly impression from television too. Never been there thought Sad..

I watch Judge Judy sometimes and though I am Shock at some of the stories - its often Jerry Springer with a legal twist - I am also sometimes equally shocked about how often people take in strangers, bail them out, lend them money, etc etc. Where I live if you were in trouble, you'd be lucky to get a frosty smile. If you have money, its probably different, I suspect people would suddenly have more time Hmm.

There are some good people where I live, of course, I live in the South of England. But sometimes I feel like I'm freezing for lack of warmth. I lived in London and, of course, it is a friendly place in many ways, but fast-moving and stressful and hard to relax in, which kinda mitigates.

Any other places in UK. There must be other places than Liverpool?

OP posts:
pandarific · 08/11/2014 09:21

Ireland?

HoundoftheBaskervilles · 08/11/2014 09:24

Ohh, no, not Ireland, I lived there for four years, if you're English & you want somewhere 'friendly & free', that wouldn't be the place, lovely though it is.