Leaving a 3yr old for a night out...

[McBear]

Ok help me out.

I have a chance to go out and have a well needed night out with DP to reinvigorate our relationship/just have fun.

We are an hour from home in DPs home town. dD is with his mum. She loves his mum.

We've had an offer to stay at a friends house so I can drink (I never do and it would be great to be able to)

BUT...

I just can't shake the idea that I am being unreasonable in putting a night out above my daughter. She rarely sleeps the night and always wants cuddles. She is happy and safe with her DGma but I can't help feeling guilty. Does it make me a bad parent to do this? This will be my first night away from her.

Your DD will be fine.

Go and enjoy.

I'm sure she will be fine McBear and even if she does get a bit gripey because you are not there it is good for her to know you are not always glued to her side and I'm sure she will have lots of fun with DGma. Enjoy your night :).

Op, don't worry. You aren't a martyr or ridiculous. There's no right or wrong, only what's right for you. It's normal to feel wobbly leaving them for the first time overnight. But if your dd will be fine and you want to go, then iit's absolutely fine.

Dear god woman, you are 2.5 yrs overdue-get out there!

It sounds like she'll be happy with her Grandma so I'd go for it (and I haven't had a night out in over 3 years either and have only just started leaving 2 1/2 year old with my mum during the day so don't think you're being unreasonable on that score - I'd leave her overnight once she is happy by day and feels secure with her grandma though).

It will be fine.

I have yet to leave DD2 (3yo) overnight, but that's because of lack of options. MIL wouldn't be comfortable doing it and my parents live on the other side of the world (although on their recent visit they did out her to bed a few times so we could go out)

We do go out quite a bit though since finding a wonderful babysitter. She started by coming on Sunday afternoons and we'd go to a movie - now she comes evenings too.

It really makes a difference to my state of mind to be able to get out with DH. We're hoping to build up to an overnight with the lovely babysitter soon.

First did it when DS (ff) was four months old (in family emergency) using reliable and trustworthy empty-nester friends. All went well and after then we did it fairly often; as BILs had their children we would take theirs and they ours so it balanced out. I don't remember that DW or I felt guilty - as I say first time was an emergency when we had to go and did not have time to contemplate our navels and feel guilty about it.

Really? I went to Dublin for the weekend with my friends when DD was 8 months old. Im Funky as well as someones mum.

You sound like me!
I left my DS overnight when he was almost 2yrs old as I was maid of honour at my best friends wedding and she had paid for a room for us to stay over so we decided to go for it for it. DS was with his Nana (my Mum) who he adores and was about 20 min drive away. I felt sick in the lead up to it and put Skype on my Mums phone so we could Skype at bedtime
He had a fab time and so did we!
I totally understand your reluctance, I was and still am, the same. But it will do you both good and don't feel guilty, it's a normal thing that most parents do!

Just do it if Grandma is up for it.

My Mum (overseas) ends up with all of my siblings kids in bed with her when they stay, despite their being plenty of beds for them They love it, she loves it.

op you sound lovely

it must be so much harder to leave them when you haven't for 3 whole years

I first left mine when they were 3 months

they're now 8 & 10 and so pissed off with me this week that they're not spending half term with grandma

All your messages are making me feel so much better

I still have no idea.

I have the option to stay atMIL but that could be awkward. Just don't know...

Going to call MIL and speak to DD now

So I just spoke to DD and she said she wants to stay at MILs overnight and see me in the morning.

Looks like this is happening.

Now to think of every eventuality that could ever possibly happen and worry myself sick about it.

Wouldn't have done this without your unanimous support so thank you(I think)

I opened this thread thinking you meant to leave your 3 yr old on her own for the night!!
Go and out and have fun! It's good, nay vital, for everyone to do this occasionally ;your dd, grandma, your dh and you.

What is she still doing up at almost 10pm? No wonder she wants to stay at Grandmas for Mummy then! Bring it on!

Oh and don't forget the clocks go back tonight so you have an extra hour tomorrow morning too

God from the title I thought you were going to leave her alone

Jess threads are just so alien to me!

these

She always stays up late at the weekend. What can I say, we are wreckless parents...

she is three not three days old Go and enjoy yourself

I've had one hours sleep and am severely regretting my decision.

But are you regretting it, whilst snuggled up at your friends house with Grandma dealing with a lively 3yo an hour early :)

Go. Your dd will have a ball being spoilt by granny. You come back refreshed as husband and wife not mummy and daddy. Only surprise its taken three years. Enjoy your one night out. X