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Original poster

Or is this shitty of my friends? FB related [title edited by HQ]

84 replies

GaryShitpeas · 19/10/2014 17:24

Have two really close (or so I thought) friends I have known them both since school separately but I introduced them to eachother about a year ago.

We often socialise as a threesome and we have dc the same age

I messaged them both a few days ago to ask if they wanted to come round mine for a few drinks as had some other friends coming as well. One said no (fair enough) but the other didn't reply although could see she'd seen the message. I also sent another, separate message asking if they fancied a meet up in half term

Both didn't reply. Although again, could see it had been seen

Well today I then see on FB publicly, on one of their statuses, arranging to meet up in half term just the two of them Sad . Yet neither of them replied to my message. Btw they both live on FB on their phones so wouldn't have been an oversight.

I just feel snubbed. And I can't say anything as will appear needy. And Perhaps I am being needy. but just feel shit and like I'm back at school. I'm 34 Fgs I shouldn't care! Confused

OP posts:
alemci · 19/10/2014 18:51

yes that's really horrible. It always seems to be the 2's company, 3's a crowd mentality which I don't necessarily agree with but you know what I am trying to say.

Just give them a wide berth, they are being rude and pathetic.

sourdrawers · 19/10/2014 19:03

send them a message OP. Just say 'hi etc, didn't you get my message?'

Original poster
GaryShitpeas · 19/10/2014 19:05

Sorry babbit I was posting quick on my phone i should have been more clear, I've known them both since I was at school, but only one actually WENT to my school iyswim.

Ps love your name My dd has a toy called babbit Smile

OP posts:
NoArmaniNoPunani · 19/10/2014 19:07

They are either both twats in which case you're well shot of the pair of them. Or one is a twat and the other will realise that in a few months and come crawling back to you when she's done the same thing to her

Original poster
GaryShitpeas · 19/10/2014 19:08

I don't want to do that sour drawers as fear will look needy Blush

Which I think is exactly what I'm being tbh Confused

OP posts:
Original poster
GaryShitpeas · 20/10/2014 09:25

Oh joy this morning the two of them are tagging eachother in statuses about their fun plans for today. Lovely

Ffs ConfusedSad

OP posts:
NickiFury · 20/10/2014 09:27

Dickheads. Ignore.

CeliaFate · 20/10/2014 09:27

Like their post, so they know you'll have seen it and move on. It's easier said than done, but they're not really friends, or at least not as close as you thought.
What they've done is shitty. You don't need it.

Thebodyloveschocolateandwine · 20/10/2014 09:34

Rise above it op. Things change and friendships evolve so hold your head up high, keep off fb and don't do Ny silly gestures like blocking them or confronting them.

All this 'wendy' rubbish is so childish.

There are always better friends to be made out there.

NoArmaniNoPunani · 20/10/2014 09:35

Block the pair of them

Idefix · 20/10/2014 09:41

From experience I would delete and block from fb. This won't make you feel loads better but will give a clear message to them. It will also stop you from having your nose rubbed in their great friendship every time you go on. From experience I doubt that they will be your friends again (would you want them?) don't ignore them when you see them, bright cheerful hellos are good, I personally never give anymore than this even if they ask.

It gets easier.

MsMsMsNOTMRS · 20/10/2014 10:06

Block them, move on. In any relationship, platonic or romantic, you deserve to spent time with people who WANT to spend time with you. Their loss.

WerkSupp · 20/10/2014 10:10

Block them both. Ignore any further texts or calls. If you see them in person, just be polite and cheerful (and brief). If they mention anything, cheerfully reply how life moves on and how busy it is.

Ludways · 20/10/2014 10:25

I agree with SophiaPetrillo (excellent name btw!). Friendships change, move with the changes and you'll be much happier. They're meeting once without you and you're already hurt. If you cut everyone out of your life for one instance you'll be very lonely.

whois · 20/10/2014 10:31

This sort of thing is why I never introduce my friends to one another now, as people just act in a shitty way.

What? That's so sad. If you believe that than they probably aren't real friends. You should actually like and trust your friends!

pictish · 20/10/2014 10:32

Aw OP - listen...here's my advice. A new friendship can be a bit like a new relationship in that both parties just want to spend time together. It's all exciting and fun when you meet someone you click with, and they feel the same.
I don't think any of this is necessarily designed to hurt or exclude you, but in effect that's what is happening.

If I were you I'd do nothing. Sit back and let them gorge on each other, as is their wont. Eventually the novelty will wear off, and things should settle back down where you are all on an equal footing once more.

lisucbgiberiocnha · 20/10/2014 10:33

Friends don't exclude friends. So I would really wonder if they are your friends? Can you go ahead and make other plans for the hols. Stop following them on FB. Concentrate on others.

pictish · 20/10/2014 10:34

Friends don't exclude friends? Bit dramatic. If I make arrangements with a friend of mine, it doesn't occur to me to invite every mutual friend we have in common, in case they feel excluded.

Original poster
GaryShitpeas · 20/10/2014 10:41

I completely agree Pictish

I understand friendships evolve and change over time, it's only natural, and I honestly don't mind when Friends meet up without me

It's just a bit hurtful that they've ignored my messages then I have seen their Facebook plans

But have now unfollowed Grin

OP posts:
lisucbgiberiocnha · 20/10/2014 11:05

No I don't invite every friend to everything but if a friend asks to come along/meet up, I would ensure i was inclusive. It would be hurtful otherwise

Well done for unfollowing. Keep an open mind and let them do some of the running now.

CherryDolphin · 20/10/2014 11:16

Ignore them. If they want to be like this then let them. Have they not got back to you at all since?

BackforGood · 20/10/2014 11:19

What Sophia said, on P1, and then TheBody and a couple of others have said on this page.

I can't believe how childish some of the replies are on this thread.

2 people are allowed to meet up without permission from another you know. Friendships change and evolve and move on and - in my world anyway - can be flexible.

Wishfulmakeupping · 20/10/2014 11:21

It's so hard but I think you've handled it really well OP. Rise above it, act normal dont let them see they've got to you with their playground antics.
Go and have fun with other friends.
I know it sucks- I've been let down by a friend this week and been feeling crap because of it but you can't make others behave how you would like them to sometimes people are shit :(
Hope you're ok

Aherdofmims · 20/10/2014 11:22

You will have to ignore them. It is shitty but for some reason people can just be like this.

Wishfulmakeupping · 20/10/2014 11:23

Agree that friends should be able to meet up without invite all their mutual friends but they've quite clearly been ignoring OP common manners would surely mean a quick reply saying we're already busy but hopefully meet up soon rather than just blanking her?

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