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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel I almost have to apologise for being veggie...

409 replies

Loopylala7 · 11/10/2014 22:12

We were invited out tonight with a big group, but I couldn't go due to no babysitter. Anyway DH casually mentions that, well there was nothing on the menu for me anyway. This is following a holiday where being a vegetarian was considered weird, so had to survive on junk food.

These are just a few of my recent experiences. TBH I feel lucky if I go to a restaurant and have two dishes to choose from. Am I being unreasonable to think this is unreasonable?

OP posts:
SuburbanRhonda · 12/10/2014 20:50

Yes, definitely "more research needed". I eat anything, as long as it's not animal derived. I don't have any foods I avoid, although of course I have preferences. And that's my experience of vegetarians generally; my anecdotal evidence is about as useful as yours duhghl.

Alwayswiththechords · 12/10/2014 20:54

chipping i went to claridge's about 5 years ago, but I think Gordon Ramsay no longer has the restaurant there.

duhgldiuhfdsli · 12/10/2014 20:55

Which is weird because my experience of adult meat eaters is they are stuck in such a fucking rut

I'm fifty. I'd guess that of those years I've spent roughly ten as a vegetarian of varying degrees of precision and a couple as a vegan. I say that these days I probably eat meat or fish a couple of times a week, maybe three, although it's a bit variable (more in the winter, less in the summer), the rest of the time being mostly pulse based. I've spent enough time in Japan, in particular, to eat almost anything from the sea, too. I can't think of any foodstuff I won't eat, although I did once have a meal in Portugal consisting of nothing but blood sausages that rather defeated me. Could you give me some advice on broadening my diet?

SuburbanRhonda · 12/10/2014 20:56

That Gordon Ramsay story really puzzles me because he's the biggest vegetarian-hater of them all.

SuburbanRhonda · 12/10/2014 20:57

Become vegetarian, duh Grin

fascicle · 12/10/2014 20:59

ChippingInLatteLover
Sometimes I phone ahead, but it always turns into a drama and makes me the centre of attention which I hate. So I put up with the boring single option on the menu. It shouldn't have to be this way.

Firstly, I think it's very naive for a vegan to go to France without planning the logistics of finding vegan food there. It is getting easier to get vegetarian/vegan options abroad, but it will be a struggle if you research it beforehand.

I also think it's short-sighted to feel embarrassed about phoning ahead to a restaurant and then feeling dissatisfied about the lack of choice on the menu. You don't have to become the centre of attention by making a phone call. Some chefs enjoy the challenge of making something vegetarian and creative and providing advance warning gives them the chance to buy in ingredients they might not otherwise have. If they feel there's more interest in vegetarian food it might influence what they put on the menu in future. On the other hand, if you settle for something you don't really want from a menu, you might choose not go back to the restaurant and they might be none the wiser about their less than satisfactory vegetarian options.

OneStepCloser · 12/10/2014 21:00

hmm, my experience of Vegetarians (myself included) is of people who are really quite adventurous with their cooking (Im a passionate cook, guess thats why Risotto and Tom Pasta dont do it for me) and their palates, I also know meat eaters who are incredibly fussy, I also know people who eat the same thing every single week, or wont try anything new at all. Scientifically my results are meaningless.

ChippingInLatteLover · 12/10/2014 21:08

RufusTheReindeer Sun 12-Oct-14 20:42:27
Which is weird because my experience of adult meat eaters is they are stuck in such a fucking rut with their likes and dislikes that they wouldn't recognise gourmet if it smacked them over the head

Just so funny how everybody's experiences of life are so different

Go figure!!

^^ This

thenightsky · 12/10/2014 21:09

I'm in Brighton next weekend. Flat sitting for a relative in Kemptown. Anywhere veggie in walking distance? Smile

ChippingInLatteLover · 12/10/2014 21:10

But do you really think that the entire UK restaurant industry is leaving money on the table?

Yes.

ChippingInLatteLover · 12/10/2014 21:14

It would also be interesting to find out how many veggies are wide-ranging gourmets who eat anything

Wide ranging gourmet here, if it's vegetarian (no egg) I'll eat it. I'll even tolerate a little egg in something as long as it's not the main part of it. And none of the vegetarians I know are fussy eaters, unlike many of the meat eaters I know.

Always he's probably moved on then. That is really weird to be a GR thing though, as someone else said, he's pretty anti normally!? Maybe he figured there was good money in it Wink

Janethegirl · 12/10/2014 21:19

Ultimately if I'm feeding friends, they have 2 choices, eat it or don't. I am getting very pissed off with ones that eat this or ones that eat that. My cooking, my choice! You don't like it, don't come!!

Janethegirl · 12/10/2014 21:20

And I always let them know what's on the menu Grin

EmbarrassedPossessed · 12/10/2014 21:22

When I declared myself vegetarian as a teenager, I had to promise my parents that I would try everything veggie that I was offered, as I couldn't just eat peas, carrots and potatoes. I took it seriously and actively widened the range of things I would eat. As an adult, I'm always thinking about having a varied and interesting diet, particularly when pregnant given the extra restrictions that places on you.

RufusTheReindeer · 12/10/2014 21:22

duh

Sorry, was talking of my experiences of meat eaters...

Not about you and your eating habits, but well done on making it about you

ChippingInLatteLover · 12/10/2014 21:23

fascicle Firstly, I think it's very naive for a vegan to go to France without planning the logistics of finding vegan food there. It is getting easier to get vegetarian/vegan options abroad, but it will be a struggle if you research it beforehand

Hmm Whatever. I travelled a lot (not so much these days unfortunately) for months at a time, I never quite knew where I'd end up next and didn't have any real way of finding out which restaurants would and wouldn't serve something in advance. I travelled I didn't book a poncy week in Gite. You call it naive, I call it living.

I also think it's short-sighted to feel embarrassed about phoning ahead to a restaurant and then feeling dissatisfied about the lack of choice on the menu. You don't have to become the centre of attention by making a phone call. Some chefs enjoy the challenge of making something vegetarian and creative and providing advance warning gives them the chance to buy in ingredients they might not otherwise have. If they feel there's more interest in vegetarian food it might influence what they put on the menu in future. On the other hand, if you settle for something you don't really want from a menu, you might choose not go back to the restaurant and they might be none the wiser about their less than satisfactory vegetarian options

No, the phone call doesn't make you the centre of attention Hmm but the fecking waiting staff certainly do. It's not short sighted it's simply a desire to choose something off of a menu like everyone else. It's vegetarian not some weird eating issue that no one else has ever heard of.

I got out with friends to socialise, with family and friends to celebrate, I just want something nice on the menu, not to have all of this fuss.

RufusTheReindeer · 12/10/2014 22:12

chipping

Not vegan but when we went travelling 17 years or so ago we had a short stay in a very small (half an hour to walk round) island

My first dinner there was sweet potato with cabbage cooked in milk, breakfast was the same, lunch was the same, dinner was the same, breakfast was the same...by lunch on the 2nd day they had run out of sweet potato Grin

We were there for another day!!

Rae25 · 12/10/2014 22:23

Why? If you don't like pizza, do you think your local pizza place is obligated to nip around the corner and get the ingredients for a Coq au Vin?

Erm no but that's because pizza is a type of food and if I didn't like it I wouldn't go to a pizza place, however vegetarian options are available in all of the main types of cuisine ( italian, English, Chinese, Indian, Mexican ect) so it's not unreasonable to expect a restaurant to have the capabilities to produce a decent vegetarian options without having to nip round the corner for ingredients

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 12/10/2014 22:31

itsallgoing are you in Brighton?

Nope. Glasgow Shock

muminthecity · 12/10/2014 22:31

I just saw [http://www.buzzfeed.com/jessicamisener/awkward-moments-every-vegetarian-understands#13db7bv this]] and thought of this thread. Very appropriate! Grin

muminthecity · 12/10/2014 22:32

Oops, I meant this

ChippingInLatteLover · 12/10/2014 22:34

[rufus]

I did some work in Spain, we were put up in a lovely 5 star hotel, but it was miles from civilisation (

RufusTheReindeer · 12/10/2014 22:38

chipping

Got to love that alcohol, it probably pickled your insides so you could make it home in time!!!

They had vegetable paella in some of the more touristy areas of Spain...different Hmm

But good of them to make an effort!!

ChippingInLatteLover · 12/10/2014 22:39

itsall Glasgow is fab :)

mum that's brilliant, I'd like number 15 on a tshirt!! Number one makes me want to shout loudly and often. I am vegetarian, not illiterate.

Rae25 · 12/10/2014 22:40

Seems pretty basic to me chipping :)