... not to take ds back to school this afternoon?

[greenbananas]

He has had a hospital appointment, was seen unusually quickly, and we have just got back.

As we were leaving the house at 9.45am this morning, I got a phone call from the school, asking why he wasn't in. I told the teachers last week about this appointment, and also mentioned it to the TA yesterday.

I was told that since the appointment was (late) morning, I should bring him in this afternoon, otherwise it would go down as unauthorised absence.

When I told the teacher about the appointment last week, I explained that I thought it would be unnecessarily disruptive to ds into school just for 45 minutes in the morning and an hour in the afternoon, so would be keeping him off all day.

I don't drive, and there is no easy bus route to the hospital from where we live, so we have walked (about 40 minutes each way). Ds is six years old, and quite tired. He's missed lunchtime at school so is currently eating sandwiches.

I suppose I could rush him through his lunch and get him into his uniform - but this seems really unfair on him, especially as weren't expecting to be back so soon and one of his friends is arriving at 2.30 to play with him.

Think I'm just going to take the unauthorised absence on the chin. Dragging him back to school now does not seem very child-centred to me.

However, I do understand why schools have these rules, and the school are normally brilliant about absolutely everything.

I suppose I'm feeling guilty now. .. and also letting of a bit of steam, cos I was looking forward to an extra hour playing with ds and his friend when he would normally still be finishing school.

AIBU?

DD recently had a hospital dental appt at 1400 in a city 30 mins drive away. I told the school, expecting to collect her at lunchtime and was told that I needed to collect her after afternoon registration at 1315, otherwise she would be marked down as an unauthorised absense. When I asked why I was told that the school policy was that dental appts took place at the end of the day only, they wouldn't authorise them otherwise . It was a pain in the arse to collect her at 1315 and get to the appt in an area/hospital I didn't know in time - we made it by the skin of our teeth.

Bloody stupid policy - especially as we'd been waiting 3 months for the appt.

yes, you can quite see where the, 'just call in sick' response comes from when people have experienced the nonsense involved.

Yanbu. I'm shocked at some of the replies on here. He's six, so young for everything to be so formal and strict. My dcs school are lovely and put common sense above targets and formalities - it's a school not a business ffs. My dd had a doctor's appointment on Monday. I told the teacher and then collected dd at 11. The teacher asked me if she'd be back later and I said no. No questions asked. Dd went back in the next day with a note for the school records.

Trouble is with the "just call in sick" response is that it involves the parent lying and the children being made to collude with the lie. Not to mention giving the child the message that lying is ok to get what you want.

In my book, that's never a sane response, no matter how much "nonsense" you feel the school is giving parents, as a result of attendance policies put in place by the government.

Schools threatening unauthorised absence marks are cut off their nose to spite their face. They don't want UAs all over their register.

And if you were to be pursued for that particular absence you would dimly say my child had a hospital appointment at a time that meant he couldn't attend. And nothing, nada, zilch would happen. And the school would look silly.

EveDallas I would have point blank refused to potentially miss a dental hospital appointment for the sake of an afternoon's registration mark. Do they really think all kids can be seen between 3.45 and 5? Perhaps the hospital staff can all play golf all morning and see five patients at a time in the late afternoon. Ridiculous.

Ds has a lot of appointments and I always try to send him into school beforehand and/or afterwards. We often see his classmates at the hospital and they are kept off all day. Apparently I am mean!!

Koala, what I think is sad is that there is a need for these policies in the first place.

Yes, MaryMillington, it was stupid. We are new to the school so I didn't want to rock the boat, but next week DD is having an extraction/minor surgery (genetic tooth issues) under GA. The school actually suggested that she come back in for the afternoon session - I politely told them they were barking to even suggest it

Ds1 ( 6) had a hosp apt this week His apt was at 11.15. he went to school in the morning, I collected him at tenish, went to the hospital and I then dropped him back at just after 12.

No problem.

Admittedly, I was driving, so he didn't have to walk, but I think taking the whole day is a bit cheeky. I had to go back to work, so didn't have the option. I would have loved to keep him home, BUT had I done so I would acknowledge it was a bit cheeky and take any flak from the office on the chin.

right so you weren't walking and he could get back in time to have his lunch at school so basically not in the slightest bit comparable then? if he'd had a forty minute walk there and back and hadn't had lunch yet and had missed lunchtime at school it would be a bit different?

EveDallas that's barking. Especially to insist she is there for registration rather than the actual work! How pointless to keep her there over lunchtime just for that. Stick to "hospital appt" in the letter in future and don't specify times.

Eve your mistake was telling them the exact time of your appointment

greenbananas maybe the absence was unauthorised because you didn't ask in writing or ring the office? Maybe if you write in tomorrow they will change it - if you can be bothered and if you care

I'm pretty sure schools can change it after the fact. I know ours can later the same day and possibly the next day, but we are an independent school so honestly I'm not sure if the rules re registers (which are legal documents after all) are the same or not.

In any case I hope your DS enjoyed his play date

misss that's a completely different situation. Not comparable at all.

YANBU and I'm a teacher.

He's 6 and has had a long walk to the hospital and back and a hospital appointment to get through. Lots of adults wouldn't rush back to work after that tbh and especially not for an hour or so till the end of the day.

My school goes absent if you missed register so I wouldn't bother for the sake of an hour as we are down as absent anyway. However our school does authorise appointments.
Its this sort of situation that makes the fining absences so ridiculous.

misssmapp

Be honest, the main reason you dropped your DC back at school was because you had to go to work.

Not comparable with the OP at all.

YANBU just how much vital education is a six year old going to miss in a couple of hours in the afternoon? Some PE? A story? Artwork? Counting? I'm sure it can be made up quickly, and he got lots of exercise walking both ways.
You do all realise that the school don't give two figs about it really, they just want the percentages for attendance; how could a hospital visit be unauthorised anyway?
Do the same next time I say, and sod 'em.
I'm a teacher, by the way.