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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it's rude to comment on someone's choice of name like this?

241 replies

ThatWasMean · 01/10/2014 14:33

I don't know if it's just pregnancy hormones that are making me feel this way so I may well be being unresonable and probably quite silly but I thought I'd ask anyway.

I'm expecting a baby girl and me and DH have already picked the name out for her. It's not a common name and in fact has never been a popular name in the UK, however it was fairly popular in the US at one point. Even though it's unusual I wouldn't say it was unheard of and it's certainly not weird or out there by any stretch of the imagination.

However there have been a couple of occasions where we've told people what we're going to name her and they've just outright said "that's a horrible name!" Shock.

I get that it's their opinion and everybody has names they don't like. There are lots of names I don't like however I realise that other people do like them and I would never dream of telling someone that I think it's an awful name if that's what they were going to name their baby. I would just smile politely and nod.

I should add we haven't had all negative comments, there have been lots of lovely reactions too but I was just surprised that people felt the need to tell us they think it's horrible after we tell them that's what we're naming her.

Would you tell someone if you thought their chosen name was horrible?

OP posts:
PumpkinsMummy · 01/10/2014 21:35

That's lovely. I wouldn't consider it strange at all, very pretty. You obviously just know some weird douchebags OP.

CheckpointCharlie · 01/10/2014 21:36

Its lovely. Nice sound to it.

enriquetheringbearinglizard · 01/10/2014 21:38

enrique, I have an (unusual) three letter name and I always spell it and it is rarely taken down correctly - I sometimes get mail/email with not a single letter of my name being correct. I answer to almost anything

It's a case of having to really isn't it Pasifique Wink although how people can find such simple spellings so challenging is totally beyond me.

Anyway, am still surprised that a name like Dana has been the subject of unkind comments to the OP.

Rainbunny · 01/10/2014 21:38

I love Dana, it's pretty. I like the potential nickname version too - "Danny" that someone posted above. For some reason I think it's quite cute when a girl has a male sounding nickname.

TortillasAndChocolate · 01/10/2014 21:40

Dana is a gorgeous name. So much so that I'm now putting it on my girls list - I'm not pregnant, in fact I'm single but hey, you never know what's round the corner Grin

I think it's horrible to turn your nose up at someone's choice of baby name - you will never be able to please everyone. There will always be someone who doesn't like the name you choose.

PacificDogwood · 01/10/2014 21:41
Grin
OraProNobis · 01/10/2014 21:48

Dana said the English was i.e Darner or Dana said the US way i.e. Dayna?

I think it's a pretty name either way.

evelynj · 01/10/2014 21:58

Oh God, Dana? Are you fucking serious, that's awful!

Just kidding, I love it-the only connection I can think of is Dana that did the Eurovision. It's a beautiful name. I wouldn't have been so keen on Gretchen mind you-I think because it sounds a bit like wretched.

PacificDogwood · 01/10/2014 22:08

I wouldn't have been so keen on Gretchen mind you-I think because it sounds a bit like wretched.

That's maybe because Gretchen is not a real name, but a German NN for Margaret. Which is not a hugely fashionable name just now either.

Dana is much nicer Grin

loveableshoulder · 01/10/2014 22:08

I like it a lot.

though I keep thinking: there is no Dana only Zool

mindthegap79 · 01/10/2014 22:14

It's a nice name, I like it.

Of course those people were rude twazzocks. However maybe the lesson is not to tell people the baby's name until they're born. People are very unlikely to say anything rude when introduced to cute, gorgeous baby Dana.

wildfig · 01/10/2014 22:48

I can't believe you cracked and revealed the name before I someone could guess Father Todd Unctious. Or Father Hiroshima Twinkle. Sad

NeedsAsockamnesty · 01/10/2014 22:52

Almost every single name ever used will prompt a negative reaction at some time from someone. From totally regular top 10's up to unusual never been in the top 5000's.

It's just one of those things. The only response to any negative comment about any name you choose is "go fuck yourself you rude festering bastard,you have no say about my baby's name"

It's liberating

YouWithTheFace · 01/10/2014 22:58

I'm terribly judgy but Dana is really nice!

PixieofCatan · 01/10/2014 23:06

I had a feeling it'd be Dana. There was somebody on baby names the other day talking about the name. My little sister is a Dana, you'll get confusion over pronunciation but apart from that it's fine as a name. I'd assume Darna when spelt Dana, I had a friend named Dayna at school too. A bit Hmm over "trashy and odd looking" though...

Original poster
ThatWasMean · 01/10/2014 23:25

Sorry Pixie that's just how I feel Blush. Like I said I did consider spelling it that way so it wouldn't be mispronounced but I just can't get past the fact I don't like that spelling.

Oddly enough though, it's actually been talked about in baby names right now (just checked) except the OP has actually spelt it Dayna.

I take it your sister is a dar-na though. Does she have trouble with people being unsure which pronunciation to go for?

OP posts:
Original poster
ThatWasMean · 01/10/2014 23:29

PacificDogwood this friend in particular has a habit of wanting to make her opinion known even if it does upset people. She's also a gobshite who never learned to stfu. She also has an odd dislike of anything out of the ordinary so maybe that's why she dislikes it so much.

Apart from that though she's a nice person.

OP posts:
Kittykatmacbill · 01/10/2014 23:29

Never tell anyone the name until you have baby! It's just one of those rules :-)

CheerfulYank · 01/10/2014 23:36

Oh, I like Dana!

I got all sorts of comments when I named DD (she's one.) Her name is Margaret. Mostly called Maggie. :) My mom's best friend literally gasped and said "can't you talk them out of it?!" Hmm

But Margaret she is and ever more will be. :)

Coughle · 01/10/2014 23:46

Huh? Dana is a perfectly inoffensive name. Quite lovely too.

The only reason I could think for people making fun of it is if your surname is Day. Even then it's kinda cool!

hoobypickypicky · 01/10/2014 23:51

YANBU. Apart from anything else what effect does a parent's choice of name have on anyone but the child? None, so why be rude and disparage it?!

I thought it might be Dana as soon as I read your OP. :) It's a fine name. I like it a lot.

I knew a Dana in my teenage years - this one was American and male. It worked as well for him as it does a girl.

Original poster
ThatWasMean · 01/10/2014 23:54

Oh really hoobypickypicky? What gave it away? I guess I'm just bad at hiding stuff (even though I'm sure I would have cracked eventually anyway Blush)

OP posts:
hoobypickypicky · 01/10/2014 23:58

It was nothing you said, just a mad guess on my part. I'm not that clever, I just got lucky!

Sorry, I'm not able to offer you next weeks winning lottery numbers either. Grin

NigellaAwesome · 02/10/2014 00:12

Never tell anyone the name you are thinking of beforehand.

So much more difficult for people to be rude when it is a fait accomplis.

NigellaAwesome · 02/10/2014 00:20

Oh, just caught the update. Dana is nice (so long as your surname isn't Kebab ).

I'm not a massive fan of names with Y in them, such as Kylie, Kaylie, Hayley, Baylie, Jayde, Traycey - you get the idea. Much better to go with the proper spelling.