To think it's normal for parents to be more protective of daughters

[cadburykingdom]

I know my parents were more protective of me than my brothers. I'm more protective of DD than DS. All of my friends growing up with siblings reported similar.

I have a friend now who disagrees and says they shouldn't be and it's not normal but I would think it is.

Girls are more vulnurable and go through so much more so it makes sense.

AIBU?

I don't think yabu, but you do know you are posting on mn

I think yabu.

I'm not sure what is meant by "being protective".

I aim to give my DC (both sexes) the support they need for whatever they are going through at that particular time.

I think it stems from a very old fashioned view of women in the past, that they are delicate, vulnerable, and to be protected, they were treated as such. nowadays it is indeed much different. Women are up there with the best of them. They do all sorts of careers, pilots, engineering etc whereas in the past it used to be Nursing or secretarial work.

or housewife and mother.

No. I hate this crap to be honest. Girls are no more delicate than boys.

I think some parents espcially of the older generation still have this view too.

Well yes thelovely we know that, but 50/60 years ago that was the way of thinking.

No, it's not normal. YABU.

I think you should swap protect for control and there you have it.

Societies that see girls as vulnerable reality mean they need controlling and dividing into good girls/bad girls

It's about controlling girls sexuality while condoning boys sowing wild oats etc.

It's total bollocks. All of my dss and dds needed understanding and care.

They need you to teach them to protect themselves

To add protecting then too from going into the big world and grabbing it with both hands.

Don't think so

Your friend needs to get back to 1952.

thats quite shockingly sexist and unfair to your son. And, in fact, your daughter.
And no, it is not at all normal. YABVU.

I guess this explains all the little girls sitting on the sidelines at Saturday football while their brothers play - even when they're toddlers! Little girls are too vulnerable to kick a ball around. Unfortunate.

I'm one of two girls, we were both very sporty and my sister is a scientist, so I never noticed being molly coddled by my parents, which is unusual for my age, I'm 47. My parents always encouraged us in whatever we wanted, gender never came into it. We climbed mountains, swam in rivers, we can do DIY and fix cars.

So... I really noticed when I got involved with dh and his family, his sister is treated completely different to dh, she is pandered to and spoilt, they've paid her mortgage for 10 years, they but her a car every 3 years and they get her a big shop every 2 weeks. Her wages are for holidays. This extends to her dc's who are favoured above dh's.

This'll be why SIL is so pathetic and dh is perfectly capable of looking after himself, but still has feelings of inferiority.

YABU. Im interested in what you mean by vulnerable. Don't you see boys as having emotions to?

Ludways, same with my husband/SIL. My in-laws have been incredibly generous with both of their children (and me), but it is so over the top with my SIL. She had an allowance until she was 37 - and got married.

I think we need a bit more explanation around this comment,

Girls are more vulnerable and go through so much more so it makes sense.

It doesn't make sense to me.

Sorry, went off on a tangent, never set me off about SIL, I can rant for hours, lol!

I have no idea why a girl would've more vulnerable other than the fact she's fallen for the bollocks she's been told all her life, about how weak she is. Pah, women can look after themselves, why the hell not.

Ds is far more sensitive than dd, I worry about him in ways I'd never worry about her. I tell them ever day of their lives how strong and capable they are.

Ooof.

Boots, SIL is married, her dh just sits back and let's them pay. They don't really notice us or our dc's, they actually call her eldest "the favourite" in front of us.

I make them sound awful, they are really nice people, just have this overwhelming feeling of responsibility for SIL.

Depends what you mean by 'protective'. DS has already been bullied twice by groups of girls at his primary school. Fundamentally everyone needs to learn emotional intelligence and have physical adventures. To get in the way of either of those because of sex is the definition of sexist parenting IMO.

good grief Ludways they have created a monster. How stupid

I cannot imagine deciding that any child of mine was less deserving of my attempts to ensure that they are kept safe, defended, supported and cared for purely on the basis of their gender.

I think that's rubbish tbh. I only have boys and I can't think how I could be anymore concerned for their welfare than I am. in would be no different with a girl.

Body, they have, I think they know it too, but think it's too late to back out now.

I've hijacked the thread, sorry! Lol