To feel sad to not inherit anything from my f?

[queenceleste]

I don't want to identify myself but to put it simply, my f remarried a few times and always said when that he died that he and his wife would leave everything to each other. When the second one died, they would split their estate between their respective children.

He died first, she died next, very sad and painful for all the children. She died at the beginning of the year in another country and we have heard nothing about her (once their) will and who the executors are and who benefits.

I assume that means we are no longer beneficiaries. That is her prerogative of course but it does feel sad to be left out.

I can't go into details but there is enough left for it to matter, it's not like there's nothing left.

I would like to just let it go and move on but part of me thinks, they agreed equality and then she changed it to just mean her children.

A friend of mine once told me that this almost always happens, that the step parent redirects property to her own children. That is her right of course but it does feel harsh if you're one of the ones left out.

I'm interested in hearing what other people's experiences have been in this area of step families and wills. I wish them all well, I'm only feeling a bit sad about it.

YANBU. When my GF died, he left the lot to his second wife and she made my mother and aunt out to be selfish and greedy for asking for some things (nothing valuable) which had belonged to their mother because 'they'd get it in the end'. Of course they didn't get a thing once she died.

It really hurt both of them, firstly to be made out to be greedy (which DM wasn't and DAunt isn't) and secondly to have bits and pieces of sentimental value either chucked, passed on to people who had no connection to them, or sold for a few quid.

Left... Yes, maybe so, but it very often seems to be a woman who puts the boot in to surviving relatives.

Nothing at all stopping any inheriting widow from 'making things right' if only they chose to do so.

My DF was very specific when he died (25 yrs ago today... I was 16).

He left the house to me on the condition my DSM could live there as long as she wanted. On sale of the house, I would get the value of the house as of 1989 and 0.4 of the accrued profit and if my DSM was still alive she would get 0.6 of the accrued profit.

If she had passed away her share would go to my two DSB. I chose to split into equal shares in end last yr to reflect the work my DSM had put into the house before she passed away.

We could do this as my DF left clear instructions which were fair to all.

I need to say. My DF had inherited the house from my DM 3 yrs before and he had been married less than a year when he died

maurice- that sounds as it should be!

my best friend lost her dad recently and assumed that he would leave his estate to his wife. was pleasantly suprised to find that actually, a third of the house will come to her when wife dies or moves.

she was very touched that he had gone to that trouble when they had had a difficult relationship

op yanbu

mumwithanipad your story almost made me cry. It's not the money, although it might be momentos. But it's the sense of being left out. It can take you right back to being a powerless child again, can't it?