To be confused about breastfeeding advice...?

[Absofrigginlootly]

Our pfb is due end of October..... I feel pretty determined to BF exclusively for 6 months and then continue alongside weaning for the first year. I know it can be hard to master at first and you have to work though it, I feel I have fairly realistic expectations about BF.....

But I am a bit confused about 2 things....

1. I used to work in HV and saw lots of ladies who complained about how much BF hurt in the early days. I also have friends who have BF who said the first few weeks were quite painful/uncomfortable until everything settled down.

BF session with the midwives yesterday who were ADAMANT that BF only hurts if you have the attachment wrong. They said, yes your breast will be sore when the milk comes in, but your nipples etc shouldn't be sore at all unless you have the attachment wrong.

So can I ask, since I'm not sure which is the right answer.....will it hurt? Is that something I should be prepared for? Or if it hurts (beyond sore, engorged breasts) then that is not 'normal' and I should be seeking out some help to make sure the attachment is correct? What were your experiences??

1. The MW kept saying things like "if you are sore/full/have mastitis etc you can express some milk to help and store it in bottles etc". She must have mentioned it about 6-7 times for different scenarios where expressing into bottles would be helpful.....

Then when I said "so should I buy some bottles and sterlising equipment then for these sorts of situations - as I have no intention of giving expressed milk or FF - so wasn't going to get any of that equipment in 'just in case'?" And she said, "no don't by all that stuff as it could be a waste of money if you don't use it and you'll be too tempered to start giving bottles"

So now I am confused because she kept banging on about all these situs where expressing milk and storing it could be helpful, but then told me not to buy any bottles/sterlising stuff/expressing pumps.....

So what did you do? Did you buy any of these things in advance? Or wait and see? If you did buy things are there any products you specifically recommend?(e.g. Type of pump or bottles?)

Any help/advice/stories of your experiences with starting BF would be great to hear! Thank you in advance :)

I was also told that breastfeeding only hurt if the latch/suck was wrong. For me I was very lucky that after the first 3 days it didn't hurt at all (DD wasn't sucking properly which caused me agony but after seeing the lactation consultant she managed to teach DD the "right" way to suck and pain was gone.)

My friend breast fed for 6 months and said she had pain all the time (and 2 nasty cases of mastitis) but her son was thriving and getting enough milk, so I'm not sure really. I just assumed I was lucky to have an easy time breastfeeding

(This answer is not useful at all, sorry!)

I can only give you my personal experience from bf two babies.

Did it hurt?
Yes, it did in the beginning. Not to the point of bleeding nipples, but my nipples/breasts were tender for the first few weeks, especially when they were engorged. Once the supply/demand sorted itself out it was a lot better. Also, I had DS2 before I stopped bf DS1 and still it hurt a bit as DS2's latch was different.

Mastitis- I did get this once. I hand expressed after reading some advice on Kellymom (very useful resource btw). I did have a breast pump, but neither of mine would take a bottle so only used it a couple of times.

You can get hold of breast pumps fairly quickly if you do need them. If I were to do it again I probably wouldn't bother, but as a new mum having them went some way to making me feel prepared.

Um. No. Bf hurts even if your baby's latch is perfect. It's like learning to play guitar or violin when your fingers are soft and need to get used to the pressure. You go through a couple of weeks while your skin adjusts to the intense sucking, which can be pretty agonising if baby is a boobmonster with a firm suck, thereafter it is like really soft leather - pliable and impermeable. (Unless your kid decides to sharpen their teeth on it later on...)

• yes, let down hurt in the early days, kind of a burning sensation, and several of my friends have said the same. Nipples were fine, latch was fine.

• yes, I did buy bottles and a pump, as I knew that I would be away from the baby for a few hours every now and then, and I went back to work when he was just 4 months old and EBF.

I've breastfed two children and am a peer supporter. IME pretty much every woman who breastfeeds does get some minor pain or discomfort at first simple because your nipples need to toughen up a bit to be able to take some of the hammer. However, it is usually nothing more than a bit of a pinchy feeling or some sore tingling during letdown. If the nipple starts to become traumatised or cut, then the latch probably needs tweaking.

As for bottles etc, the advice is not to express until supply is established. For am women this is at about 6 weeks but it is different for everyone.,I'd say my supply wasn't established until at least 10 weeks (2 babies with TT, reflux, colic...) So I really wouldn't bother buying bottles until then if you want to. Most supermarkets sell breast pumps.

Engorgement in the early days is not helped by mechanical expressing. This only increases supply and makesmthe situation worse. It's helped by a tiny bit of hand expressing.

If you do need some bottled or some formula in an emergency then you can get sterilising equipment for EBM or ready-made and sterile bottles of Aptamil from every 24-hour supermarket for short term use (they are very expensive!).

In 4 years of BFing I've never needed a bottle, a pump or a steriliser so I'd just wait and see.

I think that if you have pain at first it can be a sign that latch/positioning is not quite right. Also, just because the baby is gaining weight well and clearly getting lots of milk does not mean the latch is fine. My dd was terribly tongue tied and shredded my nipples but had a strong enough suck that she gained weight really quickly. So if it hurts it's always worth getting things checked - don't just put up with the pain because "it's suppose to hurt".

DD1 - pain was worse than childbirth. It was as if someone was scoring a razor blade down my nipples. They were shredded and when I fed her the other dripped blood onto her sleepsuit. It was like this throughout the feed. Not normal. The cause was a high arched palette on one side and a posterior tongue tie. Insane engorgement that made latching even more of a problem.

DD2 - pain was bearable. More like your nipple being caught in a vice and squeezed. It was only in the first minute of a feed. As time passed, the pain reduced in intensity and length. At 5 weeks, it is now just a brief few seconds. No engorgement. I fed every 2 hours as a minimum until my milk came in by setting the alarm on my phone. I have ended up pumping due to oversupply and forceful letdown.

My mistake with DD1 was just doing the NHS class and watching the NHS DVD. Breastfeeding in a non-bf culture (UK) is really hard and I should have done far more. Second time around I did my bf homework. I am still feeding at 5 weeks with no formula so it's been more successful this time. It's still much harder than I could imagine.

As you say engorgement in the first week or so is painful but not unbearably so especially as your milk supply settles.

I think it is probably true that if the latch is right it won't hurt. The issue is that one feed with a poor latch can cause pain in the nipple and breast afterwards. Once you have that pain the next feed can be painful even if the latch is now fine. I got a blister in my nipple when my DS was several months old. It was after feeding in an awkward position and the latch must have been rubbish. Then every feed after that was painful until it healed which took a few days.

Other commons problems are if the breast is not being drained effectively you can get mastitis which can be painful. Good latch would help but is not a cure all against mastitis. Thrush is another thing that causes pain and can't be helped. And it's worth getting your baby checked for tongue tie as soon as it's born.

So my conclusion it doesn't hurt if you're doing it right but if you've done it wrong even briefly it can take a few days to get back to pain free feeding. It is worth getting your latch checked if this happens and feeding as normal if you can bear it.

Good luck with your baby!

I was told the same. (Along with the gem about needing an extra 1800 calories per day and therefore being bound to lose weight instantly)

I found the initial latching on to be very painful for the first few weeks. Only for a minute though - I think if it continues to be painful for the full feed then that indicates a problem.

I bought bottles etc and a hand pump and was glad of them as ended up expressing exclusively for the first two weeks (DC in nicu). I think it's personal choice. Some people like to be prepared for anything, some people would find it too tempting to just give formula if they have all the kit.

yes, it can hurt, even if latch is fine. There are levels of hurt, obviously

yes, I would get pump/bottles/sterilizer as it can be very handy to get your baby to take a bottle of expressed milk so that, should you need/want to, you can leave him/her with someone else for whatever reason. You can always sell or donate it if it ends up unused. The suggestion is to introduce a bottle between 3 and 6 weeks, otherwise it can be very difficult (we left it late and DD was a bottle-refuser which I found very hard as I couldn't leave her for all that long. Most people I know gave the baby the odd bottle, either of EBM or formula. Except me grrrrrr!

I actually really enjoyed bfing by the way. It's highly unlikely that you'd get more than one of those issues but as you're a HV I just want to say what some of the things that can cause issues are.

I also was determined to breastfeed for six months and just couldn't because I didn't have enough milk and my DS was tongue tied. It ruins the first months of my time with DS. If I was you I would tell myself that I would like to breastfeed but if it doesn't work for you and/or your child there is nothing wrong with bottle.

I didn't find breastfeeding painful until about 6 months when teeth arrived (ouch!). I got lots of help with the latch though as we had problems getting started, turns out my DD had tongue-tie.
I was given bottles and a pump by a friend so had them in. I never really used the pump at home (but did use hospital pump in hospital until tongue tie sorted). The bottles I used fairly early on as DD was low birth weight and had jaundice so was recommended to top-up with formula until she gained weight.
If you live near shops that sell bottles and pumps then could just wait and see if you need them? Or order online with next day delivery. Think the pump and bottles were both tommee tippee ones, the bottles seemed fine, no idea about the pump. Remember you can express by hand too if you're too full/uncomfortable. For sterilising we just got a cold water steriliser and used with Milton tablets.

TracyBarlow's post has it all I think but I can add my own experience. My nipples were tender in the early days and went up to sore but then I noticed I had a bit of cracking (looked like a graze) and mw helped sort latch and then we were good.

I had some discomfort associated with blocked ducts (hard lumps) but massage in the shower with my nails (moving towards nipple) did help.

Keep an eye on your nipples, I had areas of bright pink that was the start of the cracking, which then turned red. Get some help from a peer supporter or mw as your latch may be wrong. If you experince more pain than tenderness or discomfort then again seek advise as it could be latch or toungue tie or thrush etc.

I used to go to a bfing club/meetup which was basically a load of mums sitting round drinking tea and nattering but there was bfing expert there too. I made some great friends and it helped normalise bfing for me and understand that the niggles i was experincing were the same as others.

I would also recommend kellymom as a great resource.

Good luck!

I bf ds exclusively for 6 months, dropped feeds and stopped at 10.5 months.

BF hurt a LOT in the first 3 months. I was warned off using the nipple shields (i dont know what you call them in english) by my hv. I think she wanted to rule out latch problems first. She checked once for tongue tie. I expressed when there was a tear on my nipple. Afte 6 weeks or so it only hurt for the first few seconds.

This time i will be putting cream on my nipples from 37 weeks. If it continues to hurt i will get a second opinion on tongue tie. I will have the nipple shields ready in the house. We had breast pump and i think 2 bottles in the house. i am a girl guide and i like to be prepared. I think the bit about being tempted to give formula if you have bottles in the house is bollocks. And even if its not, ff wont hurt!

Hello,

I'm usually a lurker but this post struck a cord for me. It drives me MAD how midwives all say that if it hurts you are doing it wrong...

I am currently 3 weeks into BFing my second and am much more confident this time that I'm doing it right. However, it definitely still hurt at the beginning! It doesn't hurt anymore unless he latches badly but I'd say for the first week or two, it hurt every time he latched on (even though he was latching well) - probably not for the whole feed but for longer than the 30 second let down that I was told was normal. It was mainly my nipples hurting rather than anything else but what I did this time was start using nipple cream from the start (as opposed to waiting until they got raw/blistery) and they didn't hurt nearly as much either during or between feeds. I know this isn't a massively helpful thing to say at this point but I think you do learn to distinguish between 'correct' pain and 'bad' pain caused by BFing technique.

Regarding the bottles, sterilising etc I would say that it's not worth buying unless you change your mind. I BF my eldest for 6 months exclusively and the only reason I ever expressed was because I wanted him to have a bottle of expressed milk so if you're not wanting to go down that route, I think the chances of you needing to express for one of the midwife's reasons is small and if you do, you can hand express/think about getting a pump when that happens. I have had a few clogged ducts with both babies but BFing, different positioning, hot showers, combing etc. have sorted the problem before it develops further. That's not to say (obviously) that one of the things she mentions won't happen to you but personally I would cross that bridge when you come to it.

When I was feeding my first, I told myself I would do it until 6 weeks and if it was still painful I would consider stopping then. By the time I got to 6 weeks I wouldn't even have considered stopping - this time at 3 weeks, the initial pain and discomfort has passed already.

HTH, good luck!

I didn't suffer engorgement pain with either of mine however I did have latch issues particularly with DD1. I think Moxon has it spot on using the guitar soft fingers example, they have to toughen up. Looking back I also believe that as both of mine were tiddlers (around the 6lb mark) their little mouths were always going to struggle to do a great latch with me as a novice guiding them.
DD2 was a walk in the park for my bullet nipples. Quite frankly after what feels like 68 years of breastfeeding I could withstand Chinese torture on them quite easily.

Congratulations on your determination to feed. You could always grab a Tommee Tippee hand pump for a tenner in Adsa if needed. I didn't buy a pump before DD1 as I wasn't sure BF ing would work out for us.

Just want to add to my previous post, and agree with posters here that, yes, while your nipples are getting used to the whole new experience of having a leech attached to it, the pain usually disappears within a minute or so. If it doesn't there is likely a latch issue. (I'm not commenting on pain from engorgement or mastitis, BTW; just in the issue of qnipples needing time to get tougher.)

Just reading this, my boobs hurt. DS2 is five weeks and, just like DS1, I get sever pins and needles when my boobs 'fill'. When engorged my boobs are tender and sore and, occasionally, the initial clampdown of DS2 hurts for a few seconds.

I ended up feeding DS1 for 14 months so it didn't out me off, but sometimes BFing hurts.

I'd buy in a bottle or two. Highly recommend a set like the one I got on sale recently, it was a microwave steriliser (Tommee Tippee) that came with a bottle. You can hire a breast pump from the hospital if needed.

I had to top up feed DS1 and I had nothing in because I had been blissfully unaware that BFing might not go smoothly. Having to buy stuff in in a mad panic just added to a stressful and upsetting time.

Is it just me that had toe curling pain and dreaded every feed? Dd had tongue tie but even by day 5 when she had it cut the damage had been done. Ds didnt have tongue tie but the pain was still excruciating. Not to put a dampener on things but it CAN (not necessarily will) be mind-blowingly painful even if the latch is ok (as it was with ds). Don't feel that it's something that you are doing wrong and don't put too much pressure on yourself.

That said, all 24 hr supermarkets stock bottles and sterilisers.

Yes it hurt, both times., despite DD1 being hopeless at BFing and DD2 being a pro, from day one.

I wouldn't bother buying anything as expressing is impossible.

I didn't get on terribly well with BF and stopped at 3 months. I found it painful and not (for me) a natural thing. I also disliked the idea that I would be the only one who could feed my baby. I was very happy to express / mix feed so that DH and various eager grandparents who have a turn and let me sleep / rest / go out etc. For me that was the real thing more than the physical discomfort, I didn't want to be always within shouting distance of my gorgeous much loved babies 24/7. I need headspace and physical space. If that means putting my needs above the babys', well, then I guess I did. There is a huge amount of advice put there and none of it is ever objective on this subject. I would recommend waiting til baby is born and just taking it one day at a time. Shops are open 24/7 now. If you find you actually do need a bottle at 3am you can go out and get one (as DH did on about night 4)

Thank you for your very useful replies.....it appears there is quite a variety of experiences out there!

For those of you that did invest in bottles, pumps etc....how did you decide which ones to buy?! Was it just a case of grabbing what was nearest to hand? recommendations of a friend? Or did you do a bit of research first? (If so, where?)....I just feel very out of my depth as far as bottles etc go and I suppose I'm happy(ish) to wait and see if I need the stuff first before buying it (as I live in a fairly big city) BUT don't want to be in the midst of some kind of latching/feeding crisis and have to rush out (send DH out!) to buy stuff without knowing what to get as I think that would add to the stress of the situation even more! I'd quite like to know in advance what I would buy and where from should the situation arise (but then I'm a bit of a control freak!)

Btw, I'm not a HV....I was a community nurse within the HV team, so I generally didn't get involved with babies/families until the 6-12 week checks or much later (development checks, toddler advice etc) so feel a bit at sea when it comes to the 'early days' stuff. Plus I left that job 4 years ago so feel I have forgotten everything!

I had a baby who had a good latch from day one but it still bloody hurt! A midwife said to me it is like a new pair of shoes, hurts like the hell the first time you wear them and after each wear it gets more comfortable. I would say each wear of the shoes is a week in breast feeding terms ;)