7 yo DD told by teacher she had to share her towel with another girl - AIBU to be unhappy about this?

[VelvetEmbers]

Y3 have just started swimming, and this week it's every afternoon.

Last night DD's towel was so sopping wet it looked like she'd thrown it in the pool. She told me she'd "had to share with Anna" (not her real name). Apparently Anna only had a small towel so the teacher told DD she had to share her larger towel.

Wouldn't have been quite so bad had she dried first and handed it over, but apparently they "both dried together".

Sharing towels is an absolute no-no as far as I'm concerned, for hygiene reasons, but I've been on MN for many years and I know some of my views are odd. I also realise that what a 7 yo reports as the truth can be a different version to that of the teacher. BUT assuming this is what happened, WWYD?

I'm not opposed to towel sharing with people I know well, but it should be voluntary not imposed. There was this in the news just this week, so it seems there is more than just a theoretical risk of speading nasties even if it is small.

Wouldn't bother me at all, assuming that "Anna" is not some unhygienic lump who never washes herself.

If that is the worst or muckiest thing your child ever does or shares then you will be lucky!!!

I'd hope that Anna has gone home and told her mum that her towel was too small, and she had to share, and that her mum will send her with a bigger one next week.

As a one-off, it wouldn't bother me too much, but if it was a regular occurrence, I would ask the teacher to either ask Anna's mum to send her with a bigger towel or to take a spare with her.

I would find it a bit rank, but as someone else said, there are plenty of rank things children do and this is also kind. So I would try not to be too put out about it. But, assuming things went just as your DD reported, I think the teacher was very wrong to insist she share.

For a start, children are as entitled to their foibles as adults, and if your daughter found the idea rank she should be entitled to say "no". More importantly though, your daughter or Anna might have had a medical problem that would make sharing towels inadvisable. And being told you have to share towels by someone in authority is not a situation which makes admitting that easy. The teacher should have asked Anna if she could share a towel and then ask for volunteers from the class. Failing that, wringing out the swimming costume and using that for the worst of it, then the tiny towel, paper towel or a hand dryer to get to a state where clothes can be pulled on would have sufficed. So I would have a word with the teacher to find out her version of events and, if appropriate, let her know you find it unacceotable. Maybe offer to donate an old towel of your own so they can always have a spare.

Given my quite extensive experience of primary schools, I'd say sharing a swimming towel is one of the more hygenic things the children get up to.

Not washing hands after going to the toilet, picking noses, hands down pants, etc, then all holding hands and hugging each other. Chewing the ends of shared pencils, eating food which has been dropped on the playground or classroom floor, sneezing and coughing over each other, putting on someone else's clothes after PE. The list of undesirable activities is endless.

Honestly, it's a wonder any of them survive to start secondary school

Given the amount of germs primary children share by touching, hugging and failing to cover their mouth when sneezing etc it would never have crossed my mind to moan at a teacher as they shared a towel after swimming.

Who would want to be a teacher if every aspect of what goes on in school is criticised.

You've got to hand it to op's dd, her story sounds almost believe able

I'm amazed by the reactions to this - I honestly don't see it as any big deal at all.

And as for not sharing towels with family members; I must be a dirty cow because it wouldn't bother me at all if my husband and I used the same towel. I just grab the driest one from the rail. Neither of us is ever ill and we don't have any horrible diseases.

I took my small grandson swimming last week and dried him using my towel as he had dropped his on the wet floor and it was soaking (in all likelihood what may have happened to your daughter's towel). I can't believe anyone thinks I shouldn't have.

Honestly, I can't believe that anyone would worry about this!

Ergh!! To sharing towels, dont even with DH.
Consequences of actions for Anna and her mum. Check your swim kit. It wouldnt have seriously harmed her to dry with a small towel as much as passing a skin infection. Yes i can see if its 2 of your own kids, you know theyd spread stuff anyway
But the article linked about rugby players - why on earth would they share razers??

Yanbu.

It is the easiest way to spread ringworm (fungal infection).

yanbu, towel sharing is rank.

schools usually bring a few spares, do they not?

YABU

Kids do all sorts of things that are far more rank than sharing a towel after they've been swimming (and cleaned).

Scabies. Impetigo.

So not on.

(nurse who knows of care homes who use towels on multiple residents. One skin infection and it get grim)

My dd goes swimming with the school - her towel is barely damp when she comes home, I'm not sure how drying 2 would make it sopping.

It really wouldn't bother me, but I share towels, have never given it a moments thought. Me and the kids share them, I shared towels with my sister, parents etc.

I would wonder why your dd had to share when the other child had a towel already (if it was too small then the teAcher should have had a word with her parent after).
But the sharing wouldn't bother me as such.

When you non-towel sharers go to your friends houses, how do you dry your hands if you go to the loo?

I would NOT be happy about that but would check with the teacher first. Our primary school checked kit before they went swimming and would have given the girl a more appropriately sixpzed one from the spares.

I can be a bit OTT about stuff like that tho'. Here, everyone has their own towel and head towel (if needed), flannel and separate swimming towel.

I would guess Anna forgot hers, was standing there dripping wet and the teacher, wondering what in the hell to do, and said "find someone to share."

I somehow restrained myself from complaining about anything whatsoever at my kids' school until my eldest was in a critical year, sitting exams (I bitched a lot to my husband at night about things that irritated me). At this later point, the few mistakes they made were critical and compromised his results. I felt that my complaints actually carried weight.

I'm amazed by the reactions to this - I honestly don't see it as any big deal at all.

Isn't it nice how we're all different?

thelovelyboots Anna didn't forget her towel, it was just too small.

As I said upthread my DS (and DD caught it too actually) had molluscum contagiosum when younger. The GP said the easiest way of catching it is by sharing towels/flannels (this was after DD had caught it). DS has scars all up his legs and on his arms from it. The spots were starting to creep up his neck before they finally disappeared after 2 years. So, personally, I'd like to avoid him getting it again if possible and he knows not to share his towels with anyone, just in case.

ofcourse it wasnt too small

unless the 7 year old is the size of an elephant and she brought a flannel

even a hand towel would be adequate to dry a 7 year old

I'm just repeating what the OP said sanfairy, in reply to thelovelyboots saying she'd forgotten the towel. I completely agree with you, no towel should be too small to dry a 7 year old

As another poster mentioned upthread, molloscum is not a nice skin condition, and can easily be spread with towels. DD1 has had it, and now DD2 has it. Their school used to have a shared cloth towel (the one that pulls down on a dispenser and I think goes around and around, so your should all get your own bit, only they jam and everyone uses the same bit). I do not know how the school got away with it, especially as Ofsted do indeed specify that children should have separate towels.

Molloscum scars and is embarrassing. DD1 has small pits on her legs, face and back from them.

I would be unhappy with anyone sharing towels, and most especially with DD2 right now, as it would be very likely I that she would infect another child.

If you do decide to go in and speak to the teacher may I suggest you go and ask what actually happened rather than making a big fuss to start with. It may be exactly as your daughter has said, but it may not. Children do make things up/forget/get the wrong end of the stick...The teacher may have seen poor Anna (who may well have had nothing larger than a face cloth, we don't know) shivering and asked if anyone would let her borrow their towel. She may have asked your DD to share, meaning when she had finished but your DD decided to dry at the same time ....who knows...