Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be annoyed about sister and sil dictating xmas presents already

89 replies

crazylady321 · 16/09/2014 22:17

Still a while off but im sure like alot ive already bought quite a few bits, Ive just seen a status on fb from my sister saying she had bought her kids all their main presents already and has asked people not to buy toys only clothes. I commented and said oh shit already got all four of their presents (all toys), cousin then commented and said she felt the same and only wants clothes for her dcs which is a bummer since already bought her kids aswell. Do I give them or take back shop?
We are on a 5.00 limit for our neices and nephews this year so buying clothes would end up costing more unless only bought 1 tshirt or top or something but would feel like I was been tight, the presents I have bought have been reduced or brand new from ebay so atleast it looks like ive spent a bit.

Sil also annoyed me abit at weekend its her sons 11th birthday and oh had asked what to get him and she said clothes or xbox games again would cost a bit dont mind paying more for birthdays but then she went on about christmas and that her 9 year old dd isnt into toys anymore so to buy her a onesie or something useful and then went on to say hope nobody buys any cheap stationery sets this year which is ironic because I had my eye on a 1d set I keep seeing wont bother now.

Think its useful parents give ideas but wish people would consider some of us are on budgets. And im the total opposite if someone will ask what they want and I cant think of anything ill say stationary or art stuff at least I know it gets used eventually

OP posts:
MrsHathaway · 21/09/2014 10:51

I think that's a good idea, OP. Token gifts for those perfectly capable of buying their own clothes/books/treats.

DB and I agreed last Christmas not to bother at all this year - very liberating.

ChillySundays · 21/09/2014 11:39

Will you adopt me as your sister Mrs Hathaway?!!

We are all capable of buying our own. Even the my DCs and DN are late teens an don't go without.

And yet - every Christmas there is the same old performance.

MrsHathaway · 21/09/2014 15:19

When you're effectively - or in some cases literally - swapping tenners, it becomes absurd.

Doesn't apply to small children who'd have fuck all chance of a new bike otherwise, obvs.

ChillySundays · 21/09/2014 15:55

Mrs Hathaway - how right you are but she likes getting presents!!!

Oakmaiden · 21/09/2014 16:02

They can make requests, you don't have to buy what they asked for.

If you have already bought, then that is that. I am sure the children will like them, even if the parent would have preferred clothes. But then, it is not a gift for the parent, anyway....

DesperatelySeekingSedatives · 21/09/2014 16:55

YANBU hate this attitude towards presents where people tell you what they want you to buy them (or their kids) when you haven't asked.

We tell PIL, my dad and one of my aunts what the DC would like but only once they have asked. Otherwise we say nothing except thank you very much for the present, even if it's something we don't like. it's not that hard!

edamsavestheday · 21/09/2014 17:08

buy books. More fun than many toys and all clothes, take up little room and paperbacks are often far cheaper than other gifts.

ChillySundays · 21/09/2014 17:43

I have found that some of the presents/toys/games my DC were given as children were the most played with. At the time they open the gift I thought what the hell but soon changed my mind.

bebebringingup · 22/09/2014 00:50

I once got forwarded an amazon gift list for a one year old. I ignored it.

CrazyTypeOfIndifference · 22/09/2014 01:24

I don't think it's rude to give suggestions for Xmas, even if not asked for.

My parents always buy my dc a sackload of toys. My dad especially goes nuts on them, and always the most boyish of boys toys imaginable. He had a houseful of daughters, so I totally get that he's enjoying buying cars, trains, helicopters, footballs, doing the 'boy' thing (please don't start debating about gender equality etc...you know what I mean).

BUT...yes, both my ds's enjoy the multiple types of vehicle toys they're bought. But ds1 is a thinker...his number 1 toy that he had last year was a rubix cube. He loves books, puzzles, board games with a 'goal', interactive maps because he finds the world fascinating, his metal detector, his telescope.
Ds2 loves art and creative things. He loves dressing up, loves pretend-play toys such as a toy post office, a supermarket till, his kitchen, doctors set. His aquadraw and spirograph paint thing.

There is nothing more irritating than when year after year, you see your children bought a sackload of stuff that gets looked at once and barely touched again.

alemci · 22/09/2014 14:22

i think the post on fb was rude, wait to be asked not just assume or dictate.

jeanmiguelfangio · 22/09/2014 16:13

That is rude, I budget too and really put thought into the gifts I buy people. I hate when people say oh I just want... I mean its a present not a demand. You can buy gifts for my dd, I dont care where they come from or how much they cost, if there has been thought put into it then thats lovely. I hate the idea that people HAVE to buy presents.
I also find my dd plays with the cheap tack more than the expensive stuff anyway

moxon · 22/09/2014 18:18

I was just last week told by sil to buy her DC their Xmas presents from a very uppity continental European clothing website thank you very much.
...
I won't. They'll be getting books. From the local bookstore. Down the road.

fuzzpig · 22/09/2014 21:12

I too think it's rude to dictate if not asked for ideas.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread