to want to electrocute the freshers slightly?

[SuperFox]

Just that really, as I am rudely awoken at 330am by yet another hysterically funny game of trapdoor run I can't help but wonder what the response would be if I rigged up the door knocker with a short sharp shock; only a small one for educational purposes you understand, cause and effect is such an important lesson in life...

One of my neighbours has the joy of working at the university, his years of experience have taught him that "undergrads are all idiots, utterly clueless" (to be muttered wearily).

Anyone else love the start of the academic year and the ensuing pranks as much as I do?

If the postie enquiries, you can blame it on the freshers.

I wonder how many of them realise that if they are only/youngest the DPs are as pleased at the prospect of a few weeks without them as they are at the prospect of a few weeks without DPs?

Now eleven years since we dropped DS at university and I still remember the gleeful journey home.

Not so much fun, I know, for single parents. I am the younger of two and when I married my mother was a widow - remarried a few months later but of course we did not know that at the time - and she told me years after the event that she went home to an empty nest and began a crying jag that lasted three days. And then got a grip, and booked a holiday where she met DSF with whom she was happy for twenty-odd years until she died, so there you go!

3 days of crying! Did the poor woman not have any gin in the house? Thank goodness she got a grip and went on holiday.

alma - my postie thinks I am a bit odd as is, if I blame the freshers for the jizz drip that might traumatise him forever!

My best ever fresher idiocy was watching two spotty boys men on our local laundrette. The first was very carefuly folding and stacking his clothes into the tumble drier whilst telling his earnestly nodding chum that "my mum said if I fold everything when I tumble dry it then it won't need ironing". Imagine the look of horror on his face when he turned it on and everything span around at 1000 rpms .
To this day I can't work out if the gormless boy had misheard his long suffering mother or if she'd deliberatley misled him!

Oh heck! Another one here delivering their eager 18 year old apple of their eye to Uni next weekend so apologies in advance if she knocks on anyone's door and runs away or causes a delay in the supermarket, but she hasn't got form for either, honestly!

As a Biology student I assume she could distinguish okra from a penis but I like to think this is not through personal experience

Hettie, maybe she said, "if you fold it straight out if the dryer" ie when it was still warm...?

"super - tempting as it is, I think they will realize I am as wet behind the ears as they are, really."

LRD - no, they won't!

I couldn't stand 'Freshers' when I was one and due to changing courses I ended up going through the whole nonsence twice.

I was brought up in rural Wales, where no pub or disco gave a fuck about you being 18, I'd got being pissed out my system long before I went to uni.

Oh, pleased do be kind to the Freshers. Think of their poor mummies!

Just seems a shame that on every light hearted thread on MN these days, some poster without the intelligence to realise you can smile and have a laugh together without it being "offensive" has to come along and try to dampen the mood.

Aww, poor hakuylt!

A few years ago DP and I went away to a university city for a long weekend in the Autumn. We'd had a long journey so after we checked into the hotel we decided to go for a walk around town and find a nice pub. As we wandered around, we saw two young men - presumably Freshers - and asked them if they knew of a nice pub in walking distance. Their reply - "we don't know, we're students."

Although, in fairness, they probably hadn't been there long enough to discover all the pubs yet.

I also told the freshers next door which local pub to avoid like the plague.

I will soon be surrounded by that very special breed of fresher, the medical student. They will laugh at the suggestion that anyone might actually be cleverer than them, even when that person is actually teaching them.

One year, a guy put his hand up and told me that he knew all this and why was I wasting their time? My raised eyebrows and a 'I beg your pardon' (amidst giggling course mates) shut him up but honestly, what the fuck was he thinking, arrogant little shit who was actually older than me, wonder if that made a difference?

I work in HE. This morning, a fresher with her dad was standing in the middle of the entrance to the carpark, blocking my way. Then the same fresher plus father was standing right where I was trying to get to to get to my department, oblivious.

Most of them are fine (here, anyway, I've encountered worse). I do recall last year some little boy telling me he had a runny nose and please could he have a tissue

Maid - I reckon that's exactly the kind of medical student that qualifies & is referred to the GMC fairly quickly for being an utterly terrible doctor but has no idea why......

I reckon I can beat that story.

Several years ago, I publicly admonished a girl and reported her to the course director, after enduring a 15 min bus journey where she regaled her gaggle of mates about exactly what she'd done in an anatomy class that morning. It involved "ripping it open because, fuck it, it's dead, right?" and "flinging [body part] at [course mate], hilarious".

She was surprisingly meek when I told exactly how disrespectful she was being, not just to those who have donated to help her education but also to those people on the bus who may have a family member or friend who has donated. Did she think it was in any way appropriate for a medical professional to talk in such a way? How did she feel she was going to progress through this course if she was willing to be so indiscreet in general public where, you've guessed it, one of her future lecturers was sitting a few seats in front of her and taking copious notes to pass on to the relevant people? Your surname please, your friends have already given me your first.

I was absolutely furious, shaking in fact.

(I would say that I probably wasn't quite so coherent and articulate when I was actually in situ, I've just given the idealised version!)

MaidOfStars do you think the course director said anything beyond "next time, keep your voice down?"

do you think the course director said anything beyond "next time, keep your voice down?
No idea. I never heard any follow ups (nor did I ask for any). I suspect a short discussion about the importance of discretion (perhaps even in as a general premise) was required, and I wouldn't have wanted any greater sanctions.

There was simply no reason for that conversation to be taking place on a bus, and certainly not in the tone it was conducted.

Well done on your restraint Maid, I would have struggled not to drag her by the collar to the course director. I too have first hand experience of what disfunctional little gobshites med students can be, is there a direct correlation showing level of shiny new booksmarts versus utter lack of social grace? Weirdly the smarter the adult I know the kinder they turn out to be usually, not sure what is missing with the kidults, some of them seem downright sociopathic.

Oh god, the supermarkets.
Just gave me a flashback.
I left home at 16, worked part time, paid my rent, went to college. No supermarket excitement for me, budget far too tight for that.
2 years later, at uni... surrounded by a gaggle of girls getting excited about going to the supermarket. I can still quote, 25 years later "oh we can choose whatever we want for dinner!"

I'm not sure I've ever felt so isolated.

Sorry that's a bit miserable - but I've just never been able to see freshers as sweet for shopping ineptitude since!

My freshers next door blew it last night. Noisy feckers.

Let's all donate a quid to charity every time we hear the phrase"Oh my god!" Or " I'm , like..." over the next few weeks. Oh, hang on, I'd be bankrupt already.