Was I being unreasonable to check that this child was Ok

[PiperRose]

So first I'll come clean and I say I work in Child Protection, which I know will have coloured my judgement on this.

Right. So it's a lovely afternoon and I'm sitting in my living room with the patio doors open. At the side of the house there is a field with a public footpath running down it. I'm happily MNetting and I hear a child screaming, sobbing and shrieking for mummy. I take a look out and see a man with said child who is around 2 over his shoulder marching down the footpath and out if sight. I settle back on my chair putting this down to terrible two's, but something is niggling and the child is still screaming.

So I get up and walk to the the top of the path and see the child is sitting on a step, still screaming and the man has come down to his eye-level and is trying to reason with him. I turn away, relieved that everything is ok and hear the man tell me to 'mind my own business' . I stop and almost say something but think it's better to just leave it.

Now I'm sitting and quite literally fuming over it.

Ok I've said it before and I'll say it again. Yes if the adult had been female I still would have felt the need to check.

I'd have done exactly the same op. Yanbu.

I don't think there's any need to fume over it.

When you're disciplining a child, it's bloody hard work sometimes and having someone watching, however good their intentions, is very distracting.

Also, people are prone to judging and tutting at such stuff. If the child is a regular tantrummer, Dad has probably experienced this before, hence his reaction.

Wouldn't give it a second thought tbh.

Of course you were right to check. Safeguarding is everyone's business, as of course you already know.

There will always be arsey folk in the world, and many people do get defensive about their parenting when they are dealing with a tantrum.

You were still right to check. Also, you may have been able to help if the bloke had been more receptive.

One of my favourite memories of tantrums is when ds1 threw a howler of an epic tantrum, lasting at least 40 minutes, by the checkout in a big toy shop. I had his 2 week old little brother in a sling. Loads of other mums helped me, by sitting with me, carrying my shopping, telling me I was doing a great job of being calm etc. Without their support, I would probably have ended up in bits.

You know, there was a case in American in the early 1990s when a man was walking out a performance of Honey I Shrunk the Kids with a screaming child over his shoulder. The police were called and thank god they were - the man had already raped and murdered THREE boys.

Yes it's rare - but honestly, seriously, how can you NOT check? With stakes like that? Wouldn't you get in your knees and thank any God you might believe in if someone spared YOUR child?