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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

About open windows

58 replies

Ididntseeitsoitdidnthappen · 12/09/2014 13:15

I'm in a standoff situation here. I feel the heat and really suffer if a room is too hot, I've opened the window.

Person next to me is claiming they're cold (yet strangely refuses to put more layers on) and getting irate about said window being open and insisting it's shut

AIBU to think people who suffer in the heat should get priority over window openings as you can always add layers but it's not always practical to take them off

Full expecting to be told IABU here!

OP posts:
LatteLoverLovesLattes · 12/09/2014 13:18

YANBU

I almost always have all the windows and doors open and even in the depths of winter have a few slightly open, I like fresh air! Anyone who doesn't like it is free to layer up or bugger off Grin

Honeezreturn · 12/09/2014 13:19

Yanbu im always hot and like windows open all year round.
Buy them a scarf!

BlackeyedSusan · 12/09/2014 13:19

has she got layers to put on? will she look smart if so.. (I wear layers... tend to look like a lumpy sack of potatoes if too many)

Middleagedmotheroftwo · 12/09/2014 13:20

THis is an ongoing argument between DH and me. I like fresh air. He likes to sit round in a t shirt.

Where are you? Are you in an office type situation, or in your own home?

HouseofEliot · 12/09/2014 13:21

I agree with you but think people like us are in the minority.

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen · 12/09/2014 13:25

I agree with you completely, it's gorgeous today and I've just been to a friend's house and she had every window shut. Now I'm home I have 3 patio doors open, all the windows and it's lovely to feel the fresh air.

PenguinsIsSleepDeprived · 12/09/2014 13:27

Depends, are you in an office, their house or yours?

fairnotfair · 12/09/2014 13:27

YADNBU

RhinestoneCowgirl · 12/09/2014 13:29

YANBU, but I'm the fresh air fiend in our house, DH frets about draughts.

It smells better with the window open too.

(don't get me started about the sauna that is MILs house...)

Charliebitmyfinger · 12/09/2014 13:30

YANBU any air is welcome other than the sweaty foetid air which builds up in an Office. I used to have to go and tidy our Meeting Rooms at work anf if there were women using it they would always open the windows. If there was a huddle of blokes it used to stink afterwards (sweaty socks, stale coffee and ugh pheeew Dunhill aftershave, which I still loathe today). Your colleague could just put on a cardi OR a SLANKET -Grin

Vitalstatistix · 12/09/2014 13:31

I agree with you.

Someone who is too cold can add layers. Someone who is too hot can what? Strip naked? Not really.

If someone can easily solve a problem - eg by putting layers on - but refuses to do so then that's their problem. Why should they get their way when they think their comfort is more important than yours and are not willing to do something that is within their control so that both people can be comfortable?

selfish.

CaptainFracasse · 12/09/2014 13:33

I'm the one who is ah ways very cold. Assuming you don't talk about just right now when the weather isn't that bad, for me if I'm getting cold, adding layers might not be enough. My hands and feet are getting really really cs, regardless of the number of layers I have on. The temperature just has to be around 19~20 otherwise I'm uncomfortable. Especially if I have to stay seated (working on a computer for example)

DoJo · 12/09/2014 13:34

What is the person next to you wearing? Are more layers feasible?

AliceLidl · 12/09/2014 13:36

I can see both sides of this.

Before I was pregnant with DS I felt the cold very badly, since I've had him I suffer from being too hot.

It was awful being cold, and layers only helped with arms and torso. Hands, face, legs and feet were still cold and painful and you can't wear hats and gloves in the office. But now it's awful being too hot, especially when you've stripped off as much as is decent already.

Is she cold or is she draughty? Because it does make a difference, although I know that sounds weird.

Layers do help with being cold but if she's doing something where she needs to move about and feel comfortable doing so, they can get in her way. And as I said, her hands and feet etc might still be cold even if she does put a cardigan on.

And if it's the draught blowing on her that's annoying her rather than how warm or cold that draught is, layers won't help because it's a different kind of uncomfortable annoyance.

But from your side, you can't exactly take much off to help you cool down, so the window or a fan is really your only option.

Could you have a fan pointed at you but not her? Could you shuffle the desks a bit so she's further away from the window?

And if it is the draught rather than the actual temperature in the room, could you change the air con setting so it's the room that's cool but without the breeze blowing on her?

PenguinsIsSleepDeprived · 12/09/2014 13:38

I agree with Captain too. I feel the cold horribly and a cardie doesn't fix it on a cold day. You can't wear a fleece gloves and a hat at your desk. And even that doesn't fix a cold nose!

Lally112 · 12/09/2014 13:39

a fan? I am assuming you work in an office or somewhere with electricity then?

AliceLidl · 12/09/2014 13:46

Me Lally?

I did work in an office, now I work in a bar, but yes we have electricity. I feel a bit like I'm back in that office right now. They were very interested to know if we had electricity "up North" while I was there. Grin

The OP has a window, so I'm assuming that means she's in a building with electricity as well. It was just a suggestion though.

chesterberry · 12/09/2014 13:52

YABU to think people who feel the heat get automatic priority. As said above it is not always possible to put on more layers - it may not be appropriate to be sat in a coat, hat and gloves in the workplace. People are also limited by how many layers they have brought to work with them.

I think if you are somebody who feels the heat/cold then the first responsibility is to dress in a way which will keep you as warm/cool as possible. If you know you feel the cold and only wear a T-shirt then I have little sympathy for you and if you feel the heat but wear a thick jumper again I have little sympathy.

I had a colleague who was constantly be opening the window at work but she would do so whilst still having a cardigan/jumper on. When suggested she took her cardigan/jumper off she would say she didn't like to expose her shoulders but she always wore a vest top. Why couldn't she wear a T-shirt or a light long-sleeved shirt instead of a vest top and warm cardi?

Of course it also depends on how hot/cold it actually is - opening the window when the office is at 16 degrees is unreasonable as is insisting the window is kept shut when the heat has risen to 23 degrees.

Stratter5 · 12/09/2014 13:52

Sounds like my house, I love open windows and fresh air; everyone else,not so much. XH used to follow me round the house, shutting windows, if I was feeling annoying I'd just circle behind him and open them back up again. Tell her to put a sweater on, stuffy rooms are breeding grounds for bugs and mould.

WooWooOwl · 12/09/2014 14:29

YABVU. Especially because you think that people who get hot should automatically get priority.

In an office or workplace, the majority should decide, not the one person who gets too hot or too cold. It also depends on people's positions in relation to the window, if someone who sits near it wants it closed then it shouldn't be opened on the say so of someone on the other side of a large office.

Layers don't do that much to help unless you expect people to sit there at their desks covered in blankets and wearing arctic coats, which obviously isn't going to happen, and unless you're sitting there in a vest top and shorts, you really have no place to comment on what other people wear.

Vintagejazz · 12/09/2014 14:45

YABU if this is your attitude all year round. Whatever about wanting windows open on nice warm days, people who insist on having windows open for half the day in the middle of December are a PITA.

CaptainFracasse · 12/09/2014 15:44

Btw YABU to think they because you feel the heat you should get priority. Living together in the same place means finding a suitable arrangement for everyone, not one person imposing their wish on the others.

earlycomputers · 12/09/2014 15:55

It makes me laugh when the sun only has to come out for a second / temperature go up by a few degrees in this country and everyone strips off like its boiling hot. This country is cold most of the year round. Like other people have said - I do put on several layers even in mid summer and I even walk around the house with a hot water bottle permanently attached to me. I love it when its warm - hate being cold & miserable.
Most places in the world are way hotter than here - how do you think all these people cope? But I have a ds who is always hot and loves open windows - its annoying but I do respect this and compromise for him.

ShatnersBassoon · 12/09/2014 16:01

Are you at work? I suppose you must be or you'd be able to move somewhere that suits you better.

Were you actually suffering in the heat? It's just a regular, clement Autumn day. You can't have dressed suitably if you found it stiflingly hot today.

ThatBloodyWoman · 12/09/2014 16:03

Yanbu.
Overheated stuffy conditions are, I'm sure, one of my migraine triggers.