Annoying things you can't properly respond to

[KnackeredMuchly]

People who say "Oh you must be so lucky living so close to your family!"

The only real response to that is "Yes I know!" Because saying "Why? So I can live 5 minutes away from people who do fuck all as opposed to 2 hours away from people who do fuck all?"

/bitter

Anyone else get people saying things that are a bit innocuous but mean you have to bite your tongue?

When I was depressed, the question "How are you?" was the worst, because the only answer I wanted to give was "So miserable I want to die". But of course, I was always "Fine"

I think I need chocolate today!!!!!!!

Just tell 'em you are making sure you don't end up looking like a stick insect

you are so lucky to work outside in this beautiful weather

cleanasawhistle your 'outdoor luckiness' story reminded me ... after I had been made redundant from a job I loved, I ended up taking the most god-awful, shit boring, job as an admin. I was filing a massive pile of documents, when one of the office managers supercilious twat walked passed me and said "are you having fun?"

Oh jeeeeez, yes sure I am, fancy doing a job-swap?

People can be so thick!

I personally like the following response when someone has asked me an incredibly tactless question: "I'm sorry, did you mean to be rude? Because that comment you made was quite rude/thoughtless/asinine/etc."

When I worked for Tossco: "You look cheerful today Disgrace"

"Yeah, it's a side effect of the shitload of drugs I take for my depression*. Underneath, I still think you're all twats".

*The depression was cured by not working for twats.

This happens more often than it should

Meeting new person, some point in conversation mentioning my ds is autistic.

oh your so young that must be really hard for you

No, no it's not easy but we cope really well

well at least with having kids young you can get your life back when there older, you'll still be young you can go back to work etc

Well no we can't actually, my son will probably need high supervision and will have to live with us forever. And actually I have a job you ignorant bitch/bastard cu

I usually end up just smiling and nodding

Also mostly with old people (so can't really snap for it)
He'll grow out of it just wait until he starts school and makes some friends he'll be fine.
Again..

My mum is obsessed with weightloss, and incredibly vane. She regularly says things she thinks are fine. Like right before my wedding: ' I can see you are struggling with your weightloss, so I am losing it for you.'
' Women over 9 stone shouldn't wear heels. They look like pigs dressed as tarts '
' The trouble is with you Gerty, is you could live off lettuce and still gain weight '

Have you slimmed down? Your legs look so slim!
But I'm slim anyway...aren't I?

Dh's uncle, who is usually such a lovely funny man, thinks nothing of trying to pass me in a doorway with his beer gut sticking out and saying 'look at us two fatties stuck in the door way!'

I have 2 children with a very life limiting rare condition (that I gave to them). My DS is less affected by it, but will likely not live past 50, my DD will see 18 only with a miracle. I have already lost one child to this disease.

Sadly, the diagnosis did not come until after my first daughter had passed and my second daughter had been born. There is no treatment or cure - all that can be done is to treat symptoms as they arise.

I can't tell you how often I have heard "aren't you glad it isn't cancer?"

Of course I am - I would never want my children to have something with massive fundraising, a treatment and a potential cure.

"You have no idea how hard it is with 2 kids"

Well, I bet it's a fuck load easier then only having 1 kids because your eldest died.

Bad typing, I'm tired

i have a friend whose dd has a serious heart condition, and has nearly died several times.
She has an uncertain future but is doing well at the moment.
She is, however, tiny. She is nearly 11 but her 8 year old sister towers over her, and she is growing incredibly slowly.

She went back to school this week (Y6 :-)) and one of the mum's at the gate said to her "you're so lucky you don't have to fork out for new uniform and shoes for J every school year. My kids outgrow everything"

slithy while not annoying, per se, how about the question "how many kids do you have?"

It has been almost 14 years since I lost my daughter, and I still can't answer that question "right".

Sinister I had an exbf who used to ask 'what are you thinking?' It used to get on my nerves, as my headspace was being invaded. I think that's why he's an ex :)

My dh asks every day 'what are your plans for tomorrow?' As I'm a sahm, I want to say something like 'take over the world', I plan everything we do for dds, and at the weekend, he'll ask 'what's the plan?' I've just planned 6 days of things to do, why would I plan anything for his day off that he can be bothered to spend with us?

Agree completely exhausted

Depending on the person, I tell them "1 kid at home" if they are someone I'm unlikely to see again, otherwise I make it awkward and say "just DS as DD died 2 years ago". I know I'm a mum of 2 even though I only actively parent 1.

It hurts too much to deny her existence. I'm sorry for your loss

At least the baby is ok
After I had a massive haemorrhage giving birth, almost died and was in hospital alone.
I was hysterical with exhaustion, fear and drugs and just needed someone to give a shit

"I know how you feel, [husband] won't let me have another baby" on being told I would never have kids... yeah, because a decision to use contraception to stop your children having another sibling is exactly the same as being told it could kill you to have any at all, ever!

(turned out the doctors got that wrong, but we didn't know that at the time!)

I think sometimes people don't mean to be tactless. They are just trying to be nice or make conversation. At times people don't don't know what to say in a given situation and make it worse by saying something stupid but then probably regret it. I did this the other day. A lady in work has been off for some time with ME and is now in a wheel chair. She came in to visit and I asked her how she was. As soon as I said it I felt such an idiot as she is in a wheel chair and is obviously not very well at all.

For the fellow sufferers people talking about having 'bitch face' and being told to cheer up.

"Wow you're going to have your hands full, what are you going to do on the school run, how will you cope?"

Currently 34 weeks with DC3 DC1 just started reception, DC2 is 10 months.

I'm anticipating it will be bloody hard but my God does nobody have anything positive to say? Makes me want to go home and cry in to my pillow.

you'll get a double buggy and cope just fine on the school run, of course. what do they expect you to say "oh I was just going to ignore the middle one, be ok to leave him/her at home alone, as long they're in the cot they aren't up to anything are they?!"

congratulations!

I am 41+2 today. THREE people asked me today when dropping DS off at nursery "have you not had the baby yet?".

Yes, I had them yesterday. I've left them at home with a sandwich and a fiver and stuck a melon up my top just to piss you off. Ffs.

Came on to defend those "things that people say" as I say them all the time (and cringe inwardly when I hear myself but short of super-gluing my lips I cannot stop this guff falling out!!)
BUT so many of you have mentioned already and I had to add to it: You've lost weight!!!

I have never ever lost weight (apart from after childbirth) and get this a lot. It implies that I was a heifer as I am not particularly slim anyway/ever and all it does is draw attention to my figure/weight and put my in a bad/self-conscious mood.

Thanks ebwy I've invested in a baby jogger city mini double for the DCs.