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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be a it taken aback that one of dd's teachers has an apparent past in the adult film industry?

91 replies

saffronwblue · 02/09/2014 10:41

DD is 12 and this man is one of the English teachers. Everyone loves him. He is well known at the school for having an interest in film and running the film club. It is a widely held belief among the older girls that he directed a number of porn films. There is a director with his name and appropriate looking dates listed on the IMDB website with credits of dodgy looking movies. Private Anglican girls school.
If this is true and it is indeed him, WIBU to raise it with the principal? Or, as my DC insist, is it not relevant to his teaching ability? There is no whisper of anything untoward in his behaviour at school.

OP posts:
Original poster
saffronwblue · 02/09/2014 12:02

Yes, it may well be a silly rumour based on what comes up first on google. It was just DD earnestly telling me that he runs the film club because he has a background in adult film, that made me think it might be true. I have not mentioned it to anyone other than DH who also raised an eyebrow.
I think I always assume teachers have squeaky clean pasts.

OP posts:
CoolCat2014 · 02/09/2014 12:08

I have a very unusual name, google it and you find an American Artist who is very into new age and occult stuff.

I'm an artist but Christian, so very not into new age stuff, and would have issues if anyone mistook her for me.

Careful what you google.

ChickenMe · 02/09/2014 12:29

Leave him alone. He's not broken the law. Yes porn is not my cup of tea either but teachers are people too and are entitled to a private life. And he wasn't a teacher at that point anyway.
Also, the name of this director could be a stage name.

MasqueradeWaltzer · 02/09/2014 12:30

Yes, porn director's name is HIGHLY likely to be a stage name. In fact, if you were an adult film director with any thought of perhaps working with children in the future, would you really use your own name for the film directing?

I think it's a coincidence.

Blueandwhitelover · 02/09/2014 12:32

I spell my first name in an slightly less than usual way and used to be known by an uncommon surname (I was the only one with that name on fb at one time :-) ). I googled myself once and amongst other things found a Playboy centrefold with the same name and spelling. I'm a TA.
Twas not me.

DancingDinosaur · 02/09/2014 12:36

Does it make any difference to his role as a teacher?

DownByTheRiverside · 02/09/2014 12:36

'I think I always assume teachers have squeaky clean pasts.'

Because we choose our vocations as infants? Like nuns and the like? Hmm

'It was just DD earnestly telling me that he runs the film club because he has a background in adult film, that made me think it might be true. '

Really? She's 12!
What sort of accurate and detailed research do you think she's undertaken to verify her sources?

Cereal0ffender · 02/09/2014 12:38

I wouldn't want my dd anywhere near a porno director but this is probs just a rumour

LividofLondon · 02/09/2014 12:39

Leave him alone, for all the reasons already mentioned.

lougle · 02/09/2014 12:39

The key for me is the word 'past'. Not an issue.

AryaOfHouseSnark · 02/09/2014 12:50

I am pretty sure most people working in the adult film industry don't use their real names for exactly this reason. Unless Ben Dover is actually called Ben DoverHmm
I think it's a pretty common rumour, I remember the young good looking teacher from my middle school being a supposed porn star, he had a 6 inch cock if I remember correctly. We didn't know if that was big, small or normal back then, but it was bit rude so we had a bit of a giggle about it.

LiviaDruscillaAugusta · 02/09/2014 12:54

When I was at school there was a rumour that one of our teachers was a stripper.

PP are right - people in the sex industry tend not to use their own names. And even if it were him, why would he pose any more threat to any of his pupils than any other teacher?

MarchEliza · 02/09/2014 12:57

Hmm. I went to an all-girls grammar school in the countryside and I remember several stories about various teachers - their torrid affairs and one or two certainly had a porn past.

All totally unfounded, all totally made-up. Lots of fun for us girls to gossip about but any parents that went running to the Head about it would have looked rather stupid I think...

Bulbasaur · 02/09/2014 13:00

If this is true and it is indeed him, WIBU to raise it with the principal?

Off what? A google search and say so of a 12 year old? Hmm

We had a teacher that used to be a sniper in the army, we turned that to being he used to be a hitman. He never had a kid step out of line in his class, lol.

FraidyCat · 02/09/2014 13:01

If he's a good teacher I wouldn't want to risk losing him, so I wouldn't mention it in case it was true, and the head didn't know.

EatShitDerek · 02/09/2014 13:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DeWee · 02/09/2014 13:10

He could have the rumour simply because someone else has googled his name and it has come up with the director chappy with the same name. I woudl imagine googling your teachers' names probably has the same appeal as looking your teachers names up in the phone book as I remember people doing at school.

Unless I had concern about his teching or child/pupil relationships I would not be doing anything.

TheBogQueen · 02/09/2014 13:13

So you are participating in teenage gossip based on the daft that this teacher us running a film club and someone has seen a 'director' of a porn film ( which is probably a pseudonym -look it up - anyway)

FGS

Grow up

scouseontheinside · 02/09/2014 13:18

I think it is very likely that this is teenagers getting carried away with themselves. Unless he has an extremely unusual name, you need to check your facts or you will end up looking a fool.

But as others have said, if incorrect this still needs to be brought to attention to stop such defamatory comments being spread.

ABlandAndDeadlyCourtesy · 02/09/2014 13:23

Agree with DeWe - the rumours started because someone googled his name.

Jackie0 · 02/09/2014 13:31

Even if it was him, so what?
It isn't illegal & it's none of your business.
What outcome do you want ?
You want him sacked ?

FrenchJunebug · 02/09/2014 14:11

YABVU and run the risk to cost someone his job. IF he did work in the porn industry, it's legal, poss not threat to children, says nothing about his teaching ability and is none of your business!

Jux · 02/09/2014 14:26

Let's say it was him. Isn't it better that he is out of that industry and being a good teacher instead? (Assuming he's good.)

If it were him, what would the effect of you talking to the head about it? The head would have to act upon it and then the cat is truly out of the bag and probably there would be a number of parents complaining and bingo! Another teacher gives up. And what would he do then? Probably go back to what he knows. And so more lovely films get made, instead of more generations of children having a good teacher.

That's worst case scenario.

I think there is more good to lose by your doing anything, so I would leave it.

Lweji · 02/09/2014 14:31

I have a fairly uncommon name and there are a few of me in the world.

Unless you have specific concerns about his behaviour, I'd leave it. If anything, you might want to warn him about the gossip, so that he can deal with it if he wants to.

realitygone · 02/09/2014 14:35

Ffs...

This stuff really annoys me, chinese whispers which end up damaging a persons reputation / career.

If he did direct a few adult movies, so what unless he is using his teaching position to recruit the next stars please just keep it to yourself

if he is doing nothing wrong, has a teaching degree and that is an old chapter in his life you stand to destroy his career based on some hysteria.