Not to allow DS (12) to sleep out in the woods without an adult?

[MoveAlongNow]

I'm not am I?

DS built a 'den' in the woods today with a tarp covering it. Filled it with blankets and pillows and made a bed. I left him and his friend to it until 8.30 and then made them come in. He is furious and very upset not to have been allowed to sleep out in it.

This den is about a 10 minute walk from my house, up a steep hill, over boulders and slippy muddy bits. DS has asthma and keratoconus which has left him with very limited night vision. Just - no. Not gonna happen.

DP thinks I am being unreasonable and over protective, and that I should have left them as they would have come in if they got cold or scared. I don't even care if I am being ridiculous, I'm not prepared to sit with that much anxiety all night. But was ibu to be scared to leave him out? Is my anxiety unreasonable or normal? Would you have said yes?

DS is fuming/sulking/ trying his best to make me feel bad. I do feel bad. But not as bad as I would have if he was sleeping in the woods tonight!

If you were to leave your 12 year old and his friend alone in your house overnight whilst you partied, worked a night shift or stayed with a friend (be it only 10 minutes away) and "something went wrong" I think a lot of people would take a dim view at your having left them. A man made den in the woods has to be a greater risk. I wouldn't do it.

Eva50 we can't make parenting decisions on "what if" something went wrong and "what if" people judged me.

My dc have all done this - but in a managed way, with the Scouts.

Every year, the Leaders need to go to people in the night, who have been scared by a fox or a badger appearing in their shelter, or, when the weather turns and they discover their shelter isn't as good as they thought it was, or who have just become either ill or scared. There's no way of guessing which ones need an adult in the night.

Without that back up, I wouldn't let him just stay out there, no.

Scouts are the best bet and when they get to Ventures stage they can camp on their own with leaders to call on in emergency.