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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

To refuse to engage with anyone who uses of instead of have?

404 replies

ExitPursuedByAKoalaBear · 31/08/2014 21:29

That's it.

OP posts:
LRDtheFeministDragon · 31/08/2014 23:01

william - when I get an essay I'll mark it, talk to the student about the issues and try not to be a dick about making them feel small. Why on earth wouldn't I?

I don't need a 'chill pill'. All I am doing is pointing out that this thread is actually quite an upsetting read for some of us. I get that you're not upset and neither are some others. But that doesn't mean it's not real upset.

Justifying yourself by saying you're taking the piss out of people with bad education doesn't make you look any better, either.

longestlurkerever · 31/08/2014 23:08

I agree this is an arsey thread and not funny. Write off people who make mistakes for whatever reason if you must, but don't expect backslapping and applause from me. You just sound horribly snooty and ignorant. There are a million different reasons why received grammar might not come naturally to someone. Laziness is quite low down on the list of possibilities.

Sapat · 31/08/2014 23:11

Yanbu. Poor grammar irritates me. I don't mind typos, quick speak etc but some posts/FB entries/etc really annoy me when they are crawling with very basic grammatical and spelling mistakes and appalling punctuation. Sometimes I barely understand. Then there is bad English that is apparently ok, like our nursery staff keep saying "We was" and it really grates. Can't help but feel it makes people look stupid. Better double check what I have written now...

williaminajetfighter · 31/08/2014 23:29

Ok ok LRD. But remember when correcting work red pen marks 'hurt feelings' and purple or green pen is much more 'gentle'.

LRDtheFeministDragon · 31/08/2014 23:34

That's ok, I mark in pencil. So I can go back and correct the typos. Imagine the trauma of getting your work back with a typo in the corrections? Sad Your blood pressure would never recover.

Oh no, wait, that's just MN threads, and my students have never given a flying fuck ...

Lally112 · 31/08/2014 23:36

WTF does that even mean?? I cant tell if you are being unreasonable or not if I don't understand it in the first place. In what context are we talking?

Oldraver · 01/09/2014 00:23

Lifes too short

PhaedraIsMyName · 01/09/2014 00:31

Gives me an opportunity to link to one of my favourite bands " Could have been, should have been mine"

. Screaming Trees - All I Know:

Cerisier · 01/09/2014 00:40

Trying to return to light-heartedness of original post...

YANBU

I work in an international school and "gotten" is my pet hate.

BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 01/09/2014 00:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

however · 01/09/2014 00:58

I correct my kids when they say it, or write it. I cringe a bit when I see it. But I wouldn't disengage with anyone purely for that reason.

Because that would make me a dick.

BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 01/09/2014 01:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bogeyface · 01/09/2014 01:05

Yes, because it makes you a snob.

Some people can think perfectly well but not write so well. My cousin is the considered to be one of the worlds foremost experts in her field. The treatment of abused children in the west is changing on the back of her work. She has written several set texts.

She cant spell worth a damn. She, like me, was taught to read and write with ITA. She, unlike me, has dyslexia that was not diagnosed until she was almost 40. So while I and my peers learned to spell twice, she learned once and never really moved past that. She can think her way through any problem you care to name but it takes her twice as long to right it down as it would for a 5 year old to do it. She uses of instead of have, but if your child had been sexually abused and didnt know how to articulate their feelings about it or wanted some support in giving evidence, you would want her on your side.

ProfessorVonIgelfeld · 01/09/2014 01:06

What about people talking about 'draws' when they mean 'drawers'? Grrr! Angry

Suzannewithaplan · 01/09/2014 01:13

If I see 'of' rather than 'have' I think 'thicko' and I don't bother to read the post.

Suzannewithaplan · 01/09/2014 01:18

it's just heuristics, a quick way of weeding out the dross

Nancy66 · 01/09/2014 01:24

I don't get the 'draws' v 'drawers' one. surely it's same pronunciation ?

ArsenicyOldFace · 01/09/2014 01:34

What about people talking about 'draws' when they mean 'drawers'? Grrr!

Good if you want cheap furniture.

Searching ebay using mis-spellings is the best way to get a bargain

ProfessorVonIgelfeld · 01/09/2014 01:44

I don't get the 'draws' v 'drawers' one. surely it's same pronunciation ?

Not if you're Scottish, it isn't. And the things in which you store clothes, etc. in a chest of drawers are not 'draws'!

bikermouse1 · 01/09/2014 05:00

Cerisier, the use of 'gotten'' in the U.S.dates back to the language spoken by the Pilgrim Fathers at the time, I think.

An example of a case where language hasn't evolved?

Dolcelatte · 01/09/2014 06:17

YANBU. However, as one depressing previous poster points out, a number of teachers use the phrase, so what hope do their pupils have? Yes, languages evolve, but not always in a good way.

TerribleMother · 01/09/2014 06:19

Yuk. Nasty snobby attitudes on this thread, all dressed up as 'lighthearted'. I'd rather engage with the dross who didn't know the difference between 'would have' and 'would of', than some of the stuck up posters on this thread.

TerribleMother · 01/09/2014 06:22

Oh, and Suzanne, FYI, sentences usually begin with a capital letter, and end with a full stop. Or is that an acceptable 'thicko' error?

SignYourNameInBrownAndFlame · 01/09/2014 06:43

This is always such a contentious issue.

I am a pedant. I have had jobs where proof-reading was an important part of the role so I can't help but notice errors and some of those errors make me wince.

I never correct errors on threads (unless a poster has been sneery about someone else's spelling and grammar and in doing so has made mistakes themselves) because I know it's rude.

However, it is clear that standards are falling and one of the things being lost is the ability to switch between different forms of language in different situations or contexts. That is a useful, and in some walks of life, essential skill. While I am sure that diagnosis rates for dyslexia have increased, I am equally sure that the majority of "would ofs" and the like that I see aren't down to disability, they are down to ignorance - in the true sense, not the pejorative - or laziness. When I see "does it matter if you know what they mean?" I can't help but think that yes, it does matter. We have a beautiful, rich and varied language that allows us to communicate with precision and it is being dumbed down.

I think many of the mistakes being perpetuated are down to social media; people see a word or phrase written down incorrectly that they've only ever heard spoken, assume it must be right and copy it and so it spreads. Quite often someone gets something very slightly wrong e.g. they think they mean word A but they spell it as word B which has a completely different meaning (for example I increasingly see "adverse" and "averse" used interchangeably). Yes, I can understand from the context what is meant, but it is still wrong and in some professional contexts would be judged harshly. Personally I would rather be told (politely) if I were using a word incorrectly because I would prefer not to make the same mistake again, but there doesn't seem to be any way of doing so without coming across as a dick.

Incidentally, many of the people I know with dyslexia - and I work in a university department, one of whose functions is to agree special exam arrangements so I encounter a lot of dyslexic students - are among the most vociferous against sloppy/lazy/kre8iv spelling, because it makes life so much harder for them to recognise the standard or correct form of words.

Bakeoffcakes · 01/09/2014 07:20

Add message | Report | Message poster Suzannewithaplan Mon 01-Sep-14 01:18:06
it's just heuristics, a quick way of weeding out the dross

Fantastic typos, or are you just thick?

I find a quick way of weeding out the twats is to read thread like this.

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