To report friend to FB for photo of her blacked up?

[Greyhound]

I'm really shocked - cousin of mine has pic of herself on Facebook blacked up. She is white. The picture is of her at a fancy dress party - she has covered her face in dark brown stage make up and is wearing an "Afro" wig and Rastafarian style striped hat.

Her husband is also blacked up.

On stop being so bloody over sensitive dear!

If she's a member if the national front or something like that and has swastickas all over her FB then fine report her but for heavens sake lighten up.

I think some people wander round looking for something to be 'offended' about these days.

So are you saying being a little bit racist is ok, as opposed to very racist?

Or do you think blackface is not racist at all?

The main thing I've noticed about these claims around "speaking for others" is that they're often very selective

If the poster agrees with the point of view then whoever's "spoken for someone else" is wise, compassionate and farsighted - if they don't agree, the post is presumptious, stupid and (all too often) racist

That's the thing about principles: if they're genuine they have to be equally applied to everyone - even when what's being said might not suit - which can sometimes create difficulties

Of course not all black people think the same way on this. As an example,Tyra Banks doesn't appear to, as she has featured blackface on her show more than once. Enough do though, enough to take it seriously.
I don't see why people have got to argue against this, as if they know best. As a white woman I wouldn't really have seen it as racist (probably because white face doesn't, and neither do drag queens as it happens) but now it's been explained to me I accept and understand it is.
I just hasten to add, I've never done it ,either.

I don't think feeling put out about being patronised is on a par with suffering actual racist oppression, which still exists
and
How patronizing to think that a group of people need sticking up for in the first place - it's demeaning and is treating them as if they are victims

This thread is like a scab I keep picking.

The statements above both resonated with me.

My father is black, from a pretty impoverished background. He went on to university in the UK and worked for the Diplomatic Corps. We were brought up all over the world and attended international schools with other people like us; all sorts of different colours, religions and creeds.

I have never felt anything other than privileged. I have travelled, have many friends, a good degree and speak five languages.

I have, in England and Holland, felt very uncomfortable in work and social situations, when people are shushed and bollocked for so-called 'racist' jokes or observations. There's a lot of eye-rolling and head-tilting at me.

Let me tell you, that is the most uncomfortable feeling I have been subjected to. I know there are racists in the world, I'm related to several, both black and white. I can handle that.

I don't want anyone implying or outright telling me I should feel oppressed or belittled or ashamed or embarrassed or anything else.

It is both simple and complex.

Complex because poor white Scots & Iris were also slaves, a point that always gets ignored on these threads, but I cannot ignore it because I'm descended from them. And if you have ever been to some of those pockets where poor white people still still scratch a living, you would be hard pressed to convince them of their so-called privilege.

Simple because I refuse to dwell on the (very real) injustices of the past, perpetrated by people I never met, oppressing people I never met.

I will continue to steadfastly refuse to judge anyone by anything other than their words and actions. I don't find this unsophisticated obsession with skin colour, and the its subsequent inference of attitudes, anything other than racist in and of itself.

I do not speak for anyone other than myself. To do otherwise would be both arrogant and psychic.

Yes, Buffy, that's beautifully put and a good analogy.

I don't want to be anyone's cause.

I have used the phrase moral hard-on here before and sometimes I feel that people are using my skin colour to polish their credentials in a way I find far more sinister than a risqué joke.

otherwise the sexist ones trundle through their lives thinking that they're the norm

I think a few might, but equally, I think that some sexist men have stuck out their chins and deliberately provoke because they will not be harangued about how wrong they are.

My brother-in-law recently rolled his eyes as I was banging on to assorted teenage guys about the evils of Victorian patriarchy (several of them were getting stuck trying to back politely out of the kitchen door...). He said, after the balloon had come down, that he felt it was a very personal attack, even though I was talking about dead men.

It made me think, because of course I wasn't attacking my sons/their mates/my nephews. But he said to them, it might sound as though I was criticising their gender, unprovoked.

I thought I would ask them next time instead of telling them what the correct way is to think.

I don't think they'll be in a hurry to be alone with me post-Dickens-costume-drama for some time though!

Surely the point that some people are making is that some things that people are suggesting are racist, are not actually racist. I actually thought Montego was making that point when she used the quotations marks about the 'racist' jokes and that in making more of an issue of these things and drawing more attention to things like skin colour, people are actually being more racist.

I don't want to be anyone's cause.

I have used the phrase moral hard-on here before and sometimes I feel that people are using my skin colour to polish their credentials in a way I find far more sinister than a risqué joke.

Beautifully put, Monte, if only people would take note.

By re-reading Montegomongooses post again:

Here it is:

This thread is like a scab I keep picking.

The statements above both resonated with me.

My father is black, from a pretty impoverished background. He went on to university in the UK and worked for the Diplomatic Corps. We were brought up all over the world and attended international schools with other people like us; all sorts of different colours, religions and creeds.

I have never felt anything other than privileged. I have travelled, have many friends, a good degree and speak five languages.

I have, in England and Holland, felt very uncomfortable in work and social situations, when people are shushed and bollocked for so-called 'racist' jokes or observations. There's a lot of eye-rolling and head-tilting at me.

Let me tell you, that is the most uncomfortable feeling I have been subjected to. I know there are racists in the world, I'm related to several, both black and white. I can handle that.

I don't want anyone implying or outright telling me I should feel oppressed or belittled or ashamed or embarrassed or anything else.

It is both simple and complex.

Complex because poor white Scots & Iris were also slaves, a point that always gets ignored on these threads, but I cannot ignore it because I'm descended from them. And if you have ever been to some of those pockets where poor white people still still scratch a living, you would be hard pressed to convince them of their so-called privilege.

Simple because I refuse to dwell on the (very real) injustices of the past, perpetrated by people I never met, oppressing people I never met.

I will continue to steadfastly refuse to judge anyone by anything other than their words and actions. I don't find this unsophisticated obsession with skin colour, and the its subsequent inference of attitudes, anything other than racist in and of itself.

Nobody's saying anybody should forget injustices done in the past - that would be wrong, nobody is saying it isn't.
But I do believe that a lot of people genuiniely want to move on with their lives and live their lives without having well-meaning people pointing out EVERY little thing that is said.
I don't want anyone implying or outright telling me I should feel oppressed or belittled or ashamed or embarrassed or anything else.

Yanbu

Surely by identifying people who could/should be offended you are singling them out? Seeing them as 'different' and potentially vulnerable or something.

I'm thinking of the scenario Montego mentioned where people start eye rolling and head tilting in her direction. They are identifying her as 'different' to them - someone who could potentially be offended by what they're saying. It's creating division. Surely the point is that we just shouldn't see colour at all?

The eye rolling and head tilting is objectionable because it suggests that, were it not for the presence of the person, the comments would be ok. My experience is that it is much more likely that racist comments will be made when someone of the targeted race is not present. I don't believe that I am being patronizing or having a "hard-on" or doing anything sinister if I speak out.

sweetnessandlite
But I do believe that a lot of people genuiniely want to move on with their lives and live their lives without having well-meaning people pointing out EVERY little thing that is said.

Good for her. But what about the people who are offended?

But anything has the potential to be offensive if there is malicious intent behind it. I don't think it is the action, it is the intent behind it that is the problem. I don't automatically see someone putting make up on to darken their skin as part of a costume offensive because, to me, it's just skin! It's no different to changing your hair colour, putting in coloured contact lenses or wearing glasses to look more like someone else. It's the intent behind it that matters. Are they doing it an attempt to mock or ridicule? Then it's offensive and that would be the case whether they had worn the make up or not.

I also disagree that 'not seeing things' puts responsibility on those who are discriminated against. We are the ones who have to choose to see it as a difference or not.

As was pointed out upthread, intent, malicious or otherwise, is no defence when it comes to equality law.

What I meant was, no-one is trying 'to speak on anyone's' behalf. I would, however, take the views of a minority person regarding minority issues as a great deal more valid than those of a white liberal hand-wringer.