To not want toy guns

[yesiamwhoyouthinkiam]

I know I will get a lot of 'boys will use sticks as guns, it's just what they do' responses but I wondered if there were any other parents here who have successfully managed to at least keep toy guns out of their houses?

My DS (almost 4) has already started making shooting actions, talking about 'good shot' and mentioned 'killing monsters with guns' which I know he has picked up from nursery and my DHs tendency to let him watch slightly unsuitable cartoons (scooby doo, super ted).

I have tried explaining that guns are just not nice things to have but clearly it's all just a game to DS.

Was quite aghast at his similar aged cousin threatening to shoot my DS this week.

Anyone been able to successfully keep guns away from their kids (boys I suppose) even after they have started school?

I'll go back and read them again!

YANBU. My boys are 7 and 4. No outright ban on guns (although I did confiscate plastic knives as that seemed a bit too realistic) but we've more or less managed without. They've had the odd magazine toy and Nerfs last Christmas that they've used a few times but are not mad about. They prefer hand to hand combat.

I am all grown up,and a girl,and very pacifist by inclination.
I grew up loving books about the war,and made myself a toy machine gun out of bits of wood when I was 10 - actually I did quite a good job,I remember it with pleasure even now!

Ok,I may not be normal..., but I'm not violent,neither are my DC - very strong "use words,not hitting "(or guns...) ethos here.

So I think it isn't the toy,it is what you believe about it.If you bring your DC up to believe violence doesn't solve problems,they aren't going to rush out and shoot people.If you teach them that force is a good way to resolve issues,they might whether they have played with guns or not.
(I think that may be oversimplifying a complex issue,but its the best I can manage at the moment!)

Migsy1 unlikely. Heard of drones?

Maybe, life. But I personally just cant stand guns (by which I mean hand guns or machine guns eg: weapons designed to kill people) or what they stand for. As for shoot em up video games, Im afraid I disagree completely with Scottish mummy on this one. When he is 18 and has his own money then I cant stop him buying them but until then ,not under my roof I'm afraid, TBH I have stopped him going to friends when I know they are going to play COD or black OPUS the grafics are horrible.

Littleomar Don't soldiers use guns these days? Fighting is a grown up occupation just like being a Policeman or Fireman.

Saying you dont like CoD graphics,cintent is fair enough.CoD doesn't cause violence

I'm with you on the video games bit,StillWishihadabs. I don't think graphic onscreen violence is entertainment - my issue with it is that it puts the images in your mind,whether they were there originally or not,which I don't think is the case for small children racing around shooting at their friends.The images in my brain were of heroism and adventure,not death.

Having read back a bit I think my attitude would be different if I lived somewhere where gun crime was a present reality - it isn't where I live at the moment.

DS is a teen,but so far his friends are into Minecraft and other non-violent games.But if I do have to argue about access to 18 rated stuff before he is 18 I will!

Ill cross the video game debacle when theyre older.they're still wee

But my kids have guns,swords,dress up.my little pony and barbie are popular
As is the tablet for movies,games and cbeebies

Well I have those images in my head when I see a gun (a hand gun not a rifle) as I have seen and resuscitated victims of gun crime. So for me the image of a realistic looking weapon is horrible. As I said I am not mad on swords either (although never actually seen anyone with a sword wound).

Yes they have supersoakers and call them that as do I. They are not guns in any meaningful way the intention is clearly to each other wet !

Just do what you feel comfortable with.

I understand the discomfort about guns and weapons as toys, it feels uncomfortable even more do with do many wars going on and horrendous killings in the news every day (Ukraine and Russia, Israel and the Palestines, Syria, Iraq to name a few)

How can shooting and killing be a kids' game with real wars going on.

Despite that, my boys have nerf guns, water pistols and even an air rifle.

Is that some kind of cognitive dissonance?

Trying to think about it a bit more deeply, I think fighting and war are part of what we humans are about. Sadly. And play fighting is therefore also part if our dna.

Playing is an important part of growing up, it is not just "fun", it prepares children for adult life.

It appears all children, with some exceptions, have a love of "winning", of running faster, of shooting/hitting/aiming/fighting, as well as the need to get on in a team.

We recognise the team player thing as a key to human survival. We are more uncomfortable with our children's love of shooting/fighting. Most boys seem to like wrestling or martial arts too.

I am not sure you or I can fight these hard wired needs. I respect people who do though!

So what will you do OP? I "gave in" when they turned 5/6.

The pro toy guns lobby seems to be addressing a different point to the anti toy guns lobby.

I don't think anyone has said that playing with guns makes them violent, or likely to be armed robbers or anything, have they? And I do not know whether violent video games have any effect on children.

I just do not want toy guns or violent video games in my house. And I don't see why I should have them. I think small children playing killing games is distasteful and unnecessary. I am pretty sure the testosterone surge theory has been discredited. And I am assuming that whoever said they need to be prepared for a possible future war was being ironic.

You need to sort out your terminology.theres no pro-gun lobby,there no anti-gun lobby regards toy guns
Its somewhat provocative to use those terms in discussion about toys

Sorry, didn't mean to be provocative. Just shorthand for people who don't have a problem with toy guns and people who do have a problem with toy guns.

the "pro-toy-gun" lobby just see toy guns as toys,

the anti- lobby sees them as- well, I don't know really... perhaps that is why one side does not understand the other.

lethal weapons maybe, or replicas of lethal weapons ? I wouldn't find a toy machete (sp) cool either.

I asked before,but nobody answered- how would you feel about your child playing with a toy IED?

Toy land mine? Depth charge?

"Those of us whose children are older are just suggesting you pick your battles"
My children are older too. This was the battle I picked.

they don't make those things as toys - they are modern warfare items. neither I, nor my children would know how the heck to role play with those sorts of items, nor would they be of much play value.

though I must admit when we played with my brother's submarine in the bath we did use rubber ducky as a pretend depth charge - complete with pretty realistic sonar sounds....

and I turned out normal... honest....

I had a lot of toy guns as a kid - lots that lit up and made noises etc. When I was about 10 my dad got out his air rifle and bought an air pistol which was more manageable for me. When I joined the Cadet Force at school I joined the shooting team and captained it for a while.

As an adult I do have guns, and have won several national prizes for my marksmanship.

I haven't gone on any murderous rampages yet though.

modern warfare items you mean for in the hood,hanging with nursery massive.
yea you need tooled up with modern warfare as a child.its a jungle out there
Have a word,Mass produced plastic tat doesnt constitute modern warfare items

eh? I haven't seen any toy IEDs or landmines plastic or otherwise - so yep - real-world modern warfare items... I don't understand.

I had toy guns, as did my brother. When we were about 5 and 8 we we were found playing cops and robbers with a live, loaded (legal) handgun that belonged to a relative. We didn't have toy guns after that. Our parents seeing one of us pointing a real gun at the other was a scary moment.

My children don't have toy guns other than a couple of tiny squirty water pistols that came in party bags. DS asked for a nerf gun recently. I said no because I don't see the need to provide a toy that encourages children to play at shooting one another. If other parents want to let their children play with guns, fine.

I honestly don't think it harms children to play make believe with toy guns. I would not buy any myself for my child, but wouldn't be worried if someone gave her one. My brother and I had a lot of fun tearing about the woods with toy wooden rifles that my grandad made us. My brother was obsessed with all t things military and would buy replica pistols on holiday (we once had endure a long wait returning from Spain because the metal pistol he had bought was a bit too realistic!). He is and has always been pretty gentle and now has no interest in military things. I think it's a phase and with most boys it passes before they hit their teens and does no harm.