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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be a bit pee'ed off SIL chosen same middle name for her son as me.

83 replies

Steelojames · 21/08/2014 12:43

Out of all the names in the world, sister in law has chosen the same middle name for her son that I have.
I know I do not own the name, but come on???
Brother claims he didn't know but he did. Haven't made a scene and only told my mother I was slightly annoyed.
Am I being unreasonable??

OP posts:
SconeRhymesWithGone · 21/08/2014 16:34

My brother and I have daughters with the same first name. Everyone has always been fine with it.

wigglesrock · 21/08/2014 16:36

Lots of my cousins have the same middle name after grandparents. My friend and her sister both gave their daughters the same middle name after their mum. Happens all the time, I have 3 cousins with the same first name and two of them have the same surname (called after their grandfather).

BestIsWest · 21/08/2014 16:46

YABU. I have the same middle name as my cousin as does DS. No one cares.

Eva50 · 21/08/2014 16:48

I gave my ds one of his cousins middle names as his first name. I don't know what my dsis and bil thought as they never mentioned it and I never asked. It was my Dad's name. I wouldn't have used it if it had been my nephew first name.

You are right to let it go.

ODearMe · 21/08/2014 16:48

YABU!
You would hate me, I chose the same first name as a relative who lives at other side of the country who has same surname. We hardly ever see them though Grin

areyoubeingserviced · 21/08/2014 16:58

Yabu

Notso · 21/08/2014 17:04

I think it's odd to use the sane first name as a family member but not middle name.

I gave DD the same middle name as DSIS.

aubreye · 21/08/2014 17:08

yabu. SIL chose the middle name that is my DS's first name. I don't mind. It's just a name.

IShallCallYouSquishy · 21/08/2014 17:08

YABU. DS middle name is the same as DNephews first name. Neither of us care and DN loves that he and his cousin have the same.

scarletoconnor · 21/08/2014 17:09

Yabu sorry Smile
My sister gave her dc my child's middle name as her first name.
She said she would have never thought of the name herself but she loved it when she heard ir. I didn't mind Grin

I just tried to think of all my nieces and nephews middle names and don't know most of them so maybe they just forgot.

IShallCallYouSquishy · 21/08/2014 17:10

aubreye are you my SIL?? Wink

littlewhitebag · 21/08/2014 17:44

I chose my nieces middle name as my DD's first name, although we spelled it differently. They like the fact they share a name in common.

Kewcumber · 21/08/2014 17:54

I'd feel quite flattered if someone used DS's first name as a middle name. (OR vice versa though VERY unlikely with DS's middle name) because sometimes you like a name but can;t possibly use it because you know someone horrible with that name, well its the opposite of that...

PepeLePew · 21/08/2014 17:57

I'm sure enough people have said YABU by one for it to be clear, but thought I'd add that I have a six day old niece who has a middle name, which I've been told, but I have no recollection of what it is. That's how little it matters. I'm not convinced I know my sister's middle name, come to think of it.

Chennai · 21/08/2014 18:11

I don't think it's a problem at all - our own children have the same middle name!

But I'd say you're being more unreasonable to blame your SIL when it was your brother's idea...

PickleSarnie · 21/08/2014 18:20

YABU. My son and my sisters son both have the same middle name. And our cousins son has it as a first name. It's our late grandfather's name and we all have just as much right to use it as each other.

WineWineWine · 21/08/2014 18:45

Our son's will grow up to be close, so I will just let it go.
That's big of you Hmm

whootwhoot · 21/08/2014 19:19

Take it as a complement...you picked a good name! They are cousins, they will probably love that they have a middle name in common when they are growing up.

1sneezecakesmum · 21/08/2014 19:22
Biscuit
Xmasbaby11 · 21/08/2014 19:28

Yabu. Who even remembers middle names?

TheRealAmandaClarke · 21/08/2014 19:35

How do you know your db pushed for this name?
Why would you be pissed off at your sil given it was your db choice?
Why be annoyed when you don't even know its significance for them?
How ate you going to "let it go" when you are "fuming"

I do get that babies/ names/ anything to do with babies can make us a bit.... Unhinged. But i cant imagine why this would annoy you so much without a massive drip feed accompanying issues.

ilovesooty · 21/08/2014 20:00

Can't believe anyone seriously bothers about anything like this.

PhaedraIsMyName · 21/08/2014 21:24

Our sons will grow up to be close, so I will just let it go

How do you know that?

Aside from that I can't begin to imagine why you are making a fuss. I have no idea what the middle names of any of my son's male cousins are. It's entirely possible my brother's son might have the same middle name as my son. I can't remember.

What a fuss about nothing.

Delphiniumsblue · 21/08/2014 21:26

We gave our son the same middle name as his cousin- I can't see the problem.

HaroldLloyd · 21/08/2014 21:29

No I don't see the issue, my DS first name is the same as one of his cousins middle names.

I actually think it's a nice thing. I can understand first names as it would just get a bit confusing but middle names no.