To not want to leave sleeping baby in the car at the park

[Chocolatefudgebrownieicecream]

First post.
We have a 5mth and 2 yr old. We go to a park which has a car park right next to the play park area. Yesterday DH dropped the toddler and me at the park, took the shopping home and returned. When he returned he left the baby sleeping in the car. It was in the shade with the window down a crack. We were about 10-30meters from the car and could see it at all points. Nice area, open space around the car park so you would be able to see anyone approaching. DH thinks I was being daft to go and sit in the car. I felt really uncomfortable with him being there alone though. WIBU? Would you leave your baby alone in the car in these circumstances?

Agree Oblomov - far more children are killed/injured in car accidents than combusting cars/cat attacks/stranger abductions but so many people seem far more concerned about these incredibly rare incidents than the dangers they face every day when they drive their children around.

Totally agree Ragwort.

I actually thought the cat sitting on baby thing was an urban myth, is it actually true? (I am very allergic to cats so they are never in my vicinity)

The cat thing is not an urban myth. Think of where cats like to sleep - they look for nice warm sheltered spots - which is exactly what a baby in a pram is. HOWEVER, they don't roam around a huge area specifically looking for prams/babies - it's just that is a cat should happen to jump up on the pram where a baby was sleeping, the warmest spot is the baby's face.
When my DC were babies (in the 70s) they were always put outside ('in the fresh air'...!) for a nap every day except when the weather was really cold/wet - and a cat-net for the pram was an essential part of every mother's equipment....

"The cat thing is not an urban myth"

Are you sure?

Could you link, please, to some of the recent verified newspaper reports of children suffocated by cats in their cots?

www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1379196/Sleeping-cat-suffocates-baby.html

Found that on a quick google. Not proven though, and is the case of a family pet.

I think the cat thing comes under general sensible supervision of children and animals.

I think the thing with this thread is that the likelihood of any of these things actually happening is not really the point, it's that proper supervision of a baby minimises the risk of anything happening to that baby (minimises, not precludes), either foreseen and probable, or unforeseen and unlikely.

I don't think leaving a baby in a car that distance away whilst distracted with something else constitutes proper supervision. For me personally.

That is one article which is 15 years old

And it also says the cat was next to the baby and they were only "looking into the possibility the cat could have suffocated the baby", the baby could have died of cot death or anything.

I know cats aren't human but I think they are aware enough of other species to not sleep on a baby's face. If nothing else, babies have a reflex to move if their airways are obstructed which would put a cat off unless it was a particularly clueless and/or stubborn cat. I know they sleep in all kinds of uncomfortable looking places, but movement usually gets them moving!

Cat nets always strike me as particularly pointless as they are stretchy and surely the cat's weight would push the net right down onto the baby's face anyway.

We didn't let the cat into the bedroom at night when DS was a baby, but it wasn't something I worried about particularly.

Do kittens often get smothered by cats lying on them, I wonder?

I don't think there is a proven cat case is there, only circumstantial evidence like a cat hair in the cot for example.

I absolutely wouldn't deem it necessary to cover a pram with a cat net outside, are they even any use?

Same here Bertie, took a bit of extra care when they were tiny at the moment the cat is terrified if them both and refuses to even sit in the house when they are awake.

www.thefreelibrary.com/BABY+DEATH%3A+CAT+NOT+TO+BLAME.-a068791407

Actually maternal overlying is one of the highest causes of death in piglets, so I heard. Sorry PigletJohn!

Why the confused face bertie?

I said that was all I could come up with on a quick google, and that it wasn't proven.

I was joining the discussion about whether it was an urban myth out of interest as I've heard the cat thing, I've got no particular opinions on cat safety as I don't own one or give my baby rides home on one

Oh I see - pigletjohn was asking for verified reports and it looked like I was providing one in response.

Too clarify, I did an offhand google out of curiosity I wasn't saying "Here!! HERE IS YOUR EVIDENCE!!'

There is that old wives tale about cats stealing babies breath isn't there, that's horrible, always gave me the shivers.

I would. I leave them both sleeping on in the car outside the house, wind the windows down and do a spot of gardening or hoovering (leaving the front door open). So long as you can see and hear and the ventilation is good I don't see a problem

Aha! Okay :) Sorry! I thought it was in response and I was pointing out it wasn't very good evidence From a quick google it's a fair point to add to the discussion.

I very, very, very nearly left DS in the car earlier when I went to pay for my petrol......but then changed my mind at the last minute

First this gets de-raised with cat stories.
Now it's petrol. I don't agree with taking babies out of cars to pay for petrol. I would go as far as saying that I think it's more dangerous.

No one worried about these things before. Over anxiety at it's very worst.

Nope, any time DD has fallen asleep in the car and we don't want to wake her by taking her out (we don't have a car seat that can be easily removed) either myself or DH stays in the car with her. It's just not something I'd feel comfortable with.

I don't really recognise this anxiety you're talking about oblomov. In the case outlined in the OP if we went to the park as a family we'd just all get out of the car, put baby in buggy and come with. If we really thought the baby needed to sleep one would sit with her until she woke or had a reasonable nap. No anxiety involved. Seems perfectly natural to me.

What are the problems and consequences of being 'over cautious'? Most people who have said they wouldn't leave their babies are obviously driving them around in cars which you've pointed out is more dangerous, so it's not exactly stopping people living their lives is it? Just taking a bit more care in certain instances.

Actually soot I disagree. But my concern is of a bigger nature.
I believe it is damaging.

I have concerns re the parenting of today that its so: over-anxious, over-parenting, competitive, neurotic, and creating a generation of children who are themselves over-protected, unappreciative , un-respecting, almost spoilt brats.

I do believe its unbalanced. And I do believe its damaging.

Feels that now maybe not the time to rant on about the bit between my teeth.