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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to let DC 4+6 watch harry potter?

132 replies

Happypenguin2014 · 06/08/2014 09:44

My friend thinks we are. Every night for the past 6 days we've had movie night with munchies and harry potter 1-6. Kids have actually loved it and glued to the TV! I thought they would be scared but nope.

Aibu? I want Us to go harry potter world in a few months lol

OP posts:

curiousgeorgie · 08/08/2014 17:12

Yes, because GTA is exactly the same as Harry Potter. A valid point well made...

ziggiestardust · 08/08/2014 17:12

GTA at 5 or 6?! You sound like a DM article now

ziggiestardust · 08/08/2014 17:15

For God's sake curious don't let your DD watch Bambi before she's 12 or she'll be stabbing kids at her nursery school.

curiousgeorgie · 08/08/2014 17:16

Boy wizard learns swish and flick and plays giant chess at new school....

Gang member drives car into prostitute and steals her money while screaming profanities....

Yeah, I actually can't see a difference. I'll buy it for her first thing!

curiousgeorgie · 08/08/2014 17:16

I fear it's too late for her now Ziggie!!

ziggiestardust · 08/08/2014 17:19

Tell you what curious, do yourself a favour and put a 42in TV and the Playstation in her room. She'll entertain herself all day long while you lean out the window smoking fags and drinking special brew.

curiousgeorgie · 08/08/2014 17:27

Umm... Rtft Ziggie! Clearly I do that already!!

Artandco · 08/08/2014 17:29

But surely being mature isn't the same as being scared. I would say I'm mature, an adult, with house/ job/ kids. Deathly hallows still made me jump in various places!

I would also say my 3 and 4 year olds are much more mature in many ways than others their age. They can have decent conversations with adults, eldest can read National geographic and explain, mature in outlook and feelings. But it's just still wrong to expose them to a film of that scariness, detail, and things they shouldn't understand at that age

curiousgeorgie · 08/08/2014 17:36

In your opinion that's fine. In your opinion they're too young to be 'exposed to things they shouldn't understand'..

But she does and she is and she's a very happy, intelligent child who doesn't have nightmares.

JustAShopGirl · 08/08/2014 17:36

My aunt (the child psychologist) is not wrong IMHO -

my kids watched HP Goblet of fire aged 7 or 8 - with no troubles whatsoever..

but re- watching at age 12 DD2 was horrified at the thought that a girl would have died (because she was not rescued by her own sister) if HP had not intervened. She understood and empathised and cried and had nightmares, no such thoughts even occurred to her aged 7 or 8 where it was just a task....

(talking about the film - not the book, which put it all slightly differently as it was written for children)

curiousgeorgie · 08/08/2014 17:40

She wouldn't have died... They would've finished the task and got her. If you're picking on stuff, that's the oddest thing to pick...

And honestly, a Child Psycologist really things that a 9 year old wouldn't understand The Philosophers Stone??

I find that very hard to believe.

curiousgeorgie · 08/08/2014 17:42

I think a 12 year old having nightmares about Harry Potter 4 is a little bit weird to be honest.

JustAShopGirl · 08/08/2014 18:01

thanks... nice to know my kids are weird.

(not really - but that is because I'm mature enough to be able to see they are quite normal)

How about DD12 crying and needing a big hug when Hermione removes her whole existence from her parents' memories.

(I was not referring to the Philosopher's stone - but the later films)

curiousgeorgie · 08/08/2014 18:03

That bit is very sad, my 3 year old gets that it's sad... You'd have to be made of stone not to cry at that part

PicardyThird · 08/08/2014 18:08

I share RiverTam's bemusement at why some parents seem so very keen to push their children into engaging with particular content so very early; from curiousgeorgie's posts, particularly the nasty aspersions she cast on the intelligence of another poster's child, I am guessing that a large part of the motivation for this behaviour is so parents can feel their children are 'advanced'.

FWIW, I read/watched a lot of things as a teenager (e.g. One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich, Schindler's List) that I know I would find extremely difficult to revisit now because I am more mature, have had my empathy and emotional horizons deepened and widened by having lived and had children and would respond much more acutely to the distressing content of these things. It is no different with children. A 12yo having nightmares over something in Harry Potter suggests a genuine, empathetic response to the situation and its implications.

I wouldn't have dreamt of letting my 6 and 4yos watch the HP films - they are 9 and nearly 7 now and while my 9yo would be OK with the early ones now I see no reason whatsoever to rush -, and tbh I find the idea of a 2 or 3yo watching a full-length feature film a little . That is a lot of screen time/stimuli in one go for a very, very small child, and I can't imagine understanding of a moderately complex plot would be sustained over that period. .

Sallystyle · 08/08/2014 18:09

Because her older siblings were watching it and I wasn't going to stick her in another room when I see nothing wrong with it.

She enjoyed it even if she didn't get it all. She enjoyed it enough to sit through it.

My daughter has not been harmed and neither have my other four who watched in when they were all various ages. I don't remember how old they were but they were well under 12 when they watched them as well.

Mind you, I watch horrors with my 15 and 13 year old often too.

They are however, not allowed GTA.

Sallystyle · 08/08/2014 18:25

I find it pretty insulting that so far I have been told I am thick, irresponsible and now I apparently let them watch it because I want to feel they are advanced

I have children with sn's. I have never been a parent who wants to shout from the rooftops how advanced my children are or to try to push them into things so I can claim they are shiny. Not my style.

I simply allowed them to watch it because it was on, their older siblings were watching it or whatever, and I felt they were old enough to enjoy it and not be scared by it. And they were.

No one was harmed. No one was scared. They enjoyed it. Where is the harm?

My children don't scare easily. Hence their love of horror movies.

curiousgeorgie · 08/08/2014 18:29

PicardyThird - I don't allow her to watch because I want to feel she is advanced, she can watch and understand because she is advanced. It's a completely different thing and each parent knows their own child's limits... I know that she doesn't get scared easily, and I knew she would love them.

ziggiestardust · 08/08/2014 18:54

Yes curious! Jesus Christ! You should be entertaining your DD every minute of the day! Haven't you heard about the inherent risks of letting your child watch a WHOLE movie?

Won't someone please think of The Children?

curiousgeorgie · 08/08/2014 19:14

The 3 and 4 year olds I know must all be bloody amazing!! They have all been known to watch entire movies AND follow the plot!

How do the rules work if I take her to the cinema? Am I supposed to leave halfway through? Or just go in before the end? Do I get a special concession for being a supermum?!

Sallystyle · 08/08/2014 19:33

All my three year olds could sit through long movies. Most three year olds I know can.

I don't know how much of the plot they can follow but obviously it is enough to keep them entertained.

gamescompendium · 08/08/2014 19:37

OP YABU, there is no need for children that young to watch a 12 rated film. Even a PG at that age might be unsuitable, according to the ratings, generally a PG is only suitable for children over 8. Films that are rated as PG might be suitable for an 8 year old, but some might not be suitable until a child is 11 (I reckon Coraline is in that category since it scared me stupid!). Even within the U rating there is a difference between films that are particularly aimed at the very young child and those that have only 'mild peril' in them.

Agree with Picardy that some people seem to be 'boasting' about their child watching films with ratings higher than their age. Sounds a bit like my 8 year old nephew who gets to watch 15 rated film, he definitely thinks it makes him more grown up. But, hey, he's a not very mature 8 year old. I have to bite my tongue over that, and not happy about the situation it puts me in when I have to explain why I don't want my kids watching films that are age inappropriate.

I think if little kids don't get scared it's because they don't understand, e.g. DD1 saw an episode of Dr Who when she was about 3 or 4 with The Silence in it, she didn't find it at all scary because she just saw a man in a mask and didn't get the memory loss plotline at all. I think she would now find it very scary. Agree that maturity makes you more likely to react to certain things, I now find films where bad things happen to small children far more disturbing than I did pre-children. I can't listen to 'The Drugs Don't Work' without crying since Dad died. Maturity makes you more likely to find fiction upsetting because you have the life experience to fully understand what is being described.

My kids are terrified of loads of things, DD2 (5) refused to watch Room on the Broom last week because the Dragon is so scary, DS (1) stood in the hallway watching it through the sitting room door.

curiousgeorgie · 08/08/2014 19:52

gamescompendium - you can't put all 3 year olds into the same box as yours though... Mine does understand the plot. It's not boasting, I'm always very open about how behind she is in some areas on here, it's just the truth. She watches Toy Story, Harry Potter, ET, the 'nice' parts of Jurassic Park (fast forwarding certain attacks) and follows the plot perfectly. She can tell you the plot of a film she saw at the cinema months ago... All my friends tell people how amazing her memory is because she'll not only tell you what happened, but who she saw the film with and what she did that day.

Just because your 3 year old can't follow a doctor who plot doesn't mean all 3 year olds can't.

Mine enjoys these films, she's not scared by them and then when we go to the park she plays Jurassic Park, or she runs around with a stick as a wand, or she tells people she had a friend called ET who is a monkey-alien and he loves sweets.

I'm really concerned about some of the 3 year olds you all know! Cotton wool much?!

Altinkum · 08/08/2014 20:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SolomanDaisy · 08/08/2014 20:20

Cotton wool, to not let three year olds watch Harry Potter? I think we must live in different universes. It's just not necessary to expose them to this stuff, why would you want to? My DS is perfectly able to follow a plot. He can do this with the Care Bears movie, he doesn't need to watch Jurassic Park. If he wants to wave a wand, he can watch Ben and Holly. You have years to watch films you enjoy with your child, why risk exposing them to stuff which might damage them?

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