To think DH should learn to do plaits.

[loveableshoulder]

When dd1 and I told DH he was getting a masterclass in plaiting hair for bed, he shrugged and said 'whatever'. He clearly doesn't want to. I suspect this is more because I told him I refuse to be responsible for keeping hair tangle-free for the next ten years.

Aibu to expect this? Is he bu to be a pissed off that I refuse to be in sole charge of something that makes life so much easier, especially for me? All the more so, since he does her bedtime every other night? And we have a younger dd too?

as I showed him he stressed how easy it all looked, the arse

If my dd1 doesn't sleep with plaits in, her hair looks like a lions mane in the morning. It is so knotted and tangled without the plaits that we don't forget anymore.

She also has to sleep in a sleep bonnet like this

She wears the hat and the plaits on sleepovers and school camp.

We have tangle teezers, Mason Pearson brushes, Moroccan oil, coconut oil, detangler spray, the lot. She still needs the plaits.

Her hair is only slightly past her shoulders.

My other dds hair looks the same, but it does not behave the same. She just needs a squirt of water and a brush and it's all fine.

It is a revelation that people would go through all that palaver and not simply cut it short!

Gah! This is my bug bear with dh. He will not brush dds hair. I have shown him several times, but it's left up to me. He doesn't need to tie it up, but put a brush through their hair.

When I was in hospital last year, and I broke my leg, when I was awaiting surgery, he brought dds in every day with a hair brush, so I could do their hair...how generous of him

Tell him that if Peter Quill from Guardians of the Galaxy can take pride in plaiting hair, then so should he...

Yanbu

I remember my dad doing my hair when I was little, with varied success. He did get very good at blow drying and doing a neat ponytail. Never graduated to plaits though my mum didn't either!

Plaits? Seriously?

As long as he can make sure your child's hair looks smart and tidy I think he should be ok. Or maybe I'm being too lenient on DH!

Mrssomerhalderx perhaps you should read the OP more carefully. The OP wants her DH to plait the DD's hair for BED because otherwise it's horrifically tangled in the morning and there are tears. So making it look neat and tidy is irrelevant.

I would never dream of cutting someone's hair short if they didn't want it. It's a huge part of identity and even though they're only children, imagine having your appearance forcibly changed to something you hate.

They'll learn as they get older how to do it themselves but a quick 5 minute demo for your husband on how to do a basic plait for now.

My dad used to plait mine. In fact when he brushed and plaited my hair he was so much gentler than my mum who'd rip half my hair slight exaggeration he needs to learn. In fact he was better at washing and fringe cutting too. My mum cut me once! I much preferred dad doing it.

Do we know that child wants it long? I would have thought that children too young to plait their own wouldn't want the fuss of hair washing, brushing, standing still while plaiting etc. you could at least give them experience of nice short hair so that they know the options.
It seems madness to go through it all if one doesn't have time and the other doesn't have the inclination. I haven't got girls but I wouldn't be fussing and plaiting before bed.

^Delphiniumsblue
It is a revelation that people would go through all that palaver and not simply cut it short!^

I manage. I do other things that I don't have to do as well. Like make cakes when I could buy them. Climb hills so I can look at the view instead of looking on google. I love palaver!

My hair is short and I have to get it cut every five weeks whereas dd only has hers cut four times a year. It's her choice that she has it shoulder length. It's her hair after all.

DD is 4.7, and definitely has an opinion on the length of her hair. She'd be heartbroken if we insisted she got it cut!

Helping her keep her hair how she wants it and also presentable is just one of those jobs as a parent and I see it as no different to helping her dress if she wants to wear something she can't quite manage on her own yet, or getting down toys she can't reach.

DD1 had plaits for bed before she decided she wanted it cut shorter, they made a world of difference in the morning when brushed out with a tangle teaser!
DH does plaits as well as anyone else, it's a 2 minute or less job that barely requires thinking about.
YANBU, I'm not entirely sure why it's such an issue for him.

I'm aghast at the number of people saying they don't know how to do plaits, as if it's something really difficult. Are we thinking about different plaits here?

Excepting people with co-ordination issues or physical disabilities, who can't do a three-way plait? It's a sight easier than knitting, crochet, loom-bands or a Lego kit.

YANBU. Even my DS2 can plait hair and he's 4 so its not like your DH not capable.

If it's a basic plait yanbu. Waterfall plaits, inverted plaits across head, fishtails, french and the like are very slightly trickier.

I was asking if OP's child wanted long hair. If they do then you have to try and manage it. Do we know if the DD actually has a preference? Has she been asked if she wants it short?

If I suggested to my DH that I conduct a master class in hair management for any of our muliti-race children, he would weep with laughter.

As would the children.

Can you post a picture of the Wild Hair; my imagination is fired and I may have been unreasonable in my response.

The words 'mountain' and 'molehill' are playing in my mind.

Dh has been practicing plaiting our dons hair this evening. #saturdayfamilyfun

Sons not dons

Not read whole thread but I saw the title and was reminded of my dear departed DF.

When DM went into hospital to have my little sister, my dad was in charge of me and my long, bum length hair.

It was a standing joke in the family that I spent 10 days looking oriental due my AS dad plaiting my hair so tightly and precisely that I couldn't move my face at all

DD and I both have long hair and always plait for bed for this reason.

DH can do a reasonable plait if required (although when she was younger if I needed to go to work early and she was being slow getting ready, the 'threat' of me just leaving and her having to go to nursery/school with Dad hair ususally got her moving : )

Curiosly iirc on Little House on the Prairie the kids had hair plaited during the day but brushed out and left loose for bed...?