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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to be miffed at gift..

63 replies

Squigglypig · 01/08/2014 07:44

Well I probably am. It's our wedding anniversary. Neither of us have ever been great at gifts and we'd said to each other this year not to spend too much as we've just bought ourselves some new furniture.

Anyway his gift this morning to me was a set of writing pencils. I don't mind that, although I don't use them much.

No, the gutting but was when I read on the side "Squiggly Pig Accounts Lady". I hate the word "Lady" as it makes me think of toilets but worse is fact all he can think to get put on is what I do for a living! I am proud of my job but surely he could have found something better than that? We have daft nicknames he could have used. Frankly he could have written Squiggly Pig Is Awesome and that would have been better.

I don't know, it's not like I'm great at buying presents myself but being defined in his eyes as "Accounts Lady" is infinitely depressing.

OP posts:
CoffeeTea103 · 01/08/2014 07:49

Yanbu, maybe he did it as a way of being affectionate and funny? I would be more upset to be given a pack of pencils.

ChippyMinton · 01/08/2014 07:51

surely he meant it as a gentle joke and to take the pencils to use at work where you are the accounts lady?

look in the bright side, he went to the trouble of getting a personalised gift. what did you get him?

PositiveAttitude · 01/08/2014 07:51

But maybe he thought that the pencils would be useful for your job, hence the connection?

ArgyMargy · 01/08/2014 07:54

Is it your "wooden" anniversary ? I can't remember how many years that is but perhaps he was trying to buy you something nice made if wood? I think you are being a bit U.

What did you get for him?

Original poster
Squigglypig · 01/08/2014 07:55

Maybe, I think he knew it was a crap gift before I even opened it but I actually feel a bit offended that he couldn't think of something better to write.

And I have no idea what I'm going to do with 10 pencils. He suggested I took them to work. I rather sharply told him "I don't use pencils at work". Before turning over and staring at wall and sulking like a 5 yr old.

OP posts:
pippistrelle · 01/08/2014 07:59

Yes, the personalised aspect suggests that he put in some time, effort and thought (although maybe not quite enough of the last...) And I expect he thought you'd use them at work rather than at home, so don't feel like it's a sad indictment of your relationship.

Some people just aren't very good at presents. My own DH recognises that I like clothes, so has a track record of buying me things that really aren't my style. (It's my birthday today, and I'm slightly afraid...)

Oh, and happy anniversary, OP.

LindyHemming · 01/08/2014 08:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Squigglypig · 01/08/2014 08:01

Maybe, I think he knew it was a crap gift before I even opened it but I actually feel a bit offended that he couldn't think of something better to write.

And I have no idea what I'm going to do with 10 pencils. He suggested I took them to work. I rather sharply told him "I don't use pencils at work". Before turning over and staring at wall and sulking like a 5 yr old.

OP posts:
Toooldtobearsed · 01/08/2014 08:03

Many a birthday/ anniversary was spoilt in this house in the early days of our marriage because I would try to be imaginative when choosing gifts for DH. He did not appreciate some of them, and let me know. 'Oh, a bike......okay'. I would then be upset that I had got things wrong.
Whether it is a crap present or not, fgs do not sulk. He has tried. It is horrible to be on the other side.
We laugh about it now, but I still remember the stomach dropping moment of realisation.

Ragwort · 01/08/2014 08:04

What did you give him?

Seriously, present giving is a nightmare and my DH & I have long given up exchanging presents - despite being married over 25 years neither of us ever gets it quite right and I am the first to admit that I have never really chosen a 'perfect' gift for him.

chocolatemademefat · 01/08/2014 08:06

My birthday presents usually consist of flowers from a garage forecourt, CD's I already have or a promise to 'buy me something at the weekend' which is then completely forgotten. Despite the fact I make a big deal of everyone else's birthdays!

At least he went to the trouble of a personalised gift......Hmm

Original poster
Squigglypig · 01/08/2014 08:06

Sorry posted twice. Yes perhaps he thought it was for work and I'm being over sensitive. I am being over sensitive/unreasonable but I will be chucking them in bin when I get home.

OP posts:
Ragwort · 01/08/2014 08:06

Tooold - totally agree with what you said, I too remember the tears of disappointment in the early days of marriage (love your user name btw Grin - my sentiments exactly !!!)

ginslinger · 01/08/2014 08:09

Ah, Squiggly I'm sorry that the present wasn't what you wanted but he thought about it, he pushed a thought into action and okay, it ended up being the wrong thing but it was done through love. He loves you, it's your anniversary. Write him a note with one of the pencils.

LindyHemming · 01/08/2014 08:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Toooldtobearsed · 01/08/2014 08:11

Ragwort 'tis the best thing about getting olderGrin.
With 35 years of marriage under my belt (I was a child bride), it is funny to see how little things change.
If only we knew then what we know now eh?

Original poster
Squigglypig · 01/08/2014 08:11

Oh god, sorry I thought I'd posted but yes it's our wooden anniversary and I gave him one of those chopping boards with grooves in that catches the meat juices as it's something he always mentions when we've having a roast. I did say I was just as crap.

OP posts:
PlacidApricots · 01/08/2014 08:12

Why though, is she not allowed to show her displeasure at home, just tell him 'don't buy me pencils, I am a grown up I'm allowed to use pens now you know.'

ChippyMinton · 01/08/2014 08:12

Wooden anniversary - YABU Smile

Missunreasonable · 01/08/2014 08:13

Maybe he doesn't like his gift either and will also put it in the bin.

ginslinger · 01/08/2014 08:13

the pencils are made of wood? a pen wouldn't be.

Missunreasonable · 01/08/2014 08:14

The chopping board is worse. At least he personalised your gift.

scrivette · 01/08/2014 08:14

Ahh that would be a perfect present for me! I think that he tried to do something different, it just didn't quite work!

whereisshe · 01/08/2014 08:14

The way forward is no presents or indeed remembering it's your anniversary. That's what we do, it's very liberating.

Perfectlypurple · 01/08/2014 08:16

As it is your wooden anniversary you are a bit unreasonable although the inscription is crap!

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