AIBU to find these fb posts a bit racist?

[choochootrain1]

I have so many friends who seem to think its fine to share "black is beautiful" type posts (for the record I don't disagree and my family is mixed) however as a Caucasian woman can you imagine it going down ok if I posted a pic of a blonde haired blue eyed child with "white and proud of it"?

I'm not actually going to do anything about it, or confront anyone - it just upsets me a bit that id be shot down as a racist white supremacist for the same type of posts

I pass an 'African and Caribbean nursery school' on the way to work. Don't know what to think of that one.

My son is mixed race, could I take him there?

There's something deeply wrong with anyone who would feel spiteful about someone else having self-esteem and pride in themself, particularly if the dominant culture told them constantly that there's nothing to be proud about.

You don't have to post a picture saying "white is beautiful" the media bombards people with it daily for you.

Yes, it is good to have "black is beautiful" because as it stands white is default, we don't have much black representation. Currently, in America we still are having black girls being discriminated against because of their hair and being threatened with dress code violation because their natural hair is too poofy and frizzy and dreads or cornrows are unacceptable. As a society we are still trying to squeeze dark people into white boxes to make them "acceptable".

American companies are actually doing a better job of putting dark people on products. Even as much as 10 years ago if you walked into the diaper isle it would be all white babies on the boxes. Now there's a pretty good mix. But we still have a ways to go. Ideally when someone says "I saw a man today" any colored man will pop up in their mental image, but as it stands it's a white man and until that changes it's good to point out other races exist and they're just as awesome and beautiful as white people.

It's only 'superficial crap' if you're lucky enough to not have to think about your race in anything more than a superficial way.

Body hair removal might be superficial crap but it is also an example of how women conform to a standard set by someone other than themselves.

but aren't we just keeping racism alive by allowing double standards to be so acceptable?
What you have posted about is not racist. It's about asserting that there are possibilities other than the white theory of beauty. Think about the super models you are aware of, now name those who are anything other than white. Not many are there?
There is no such thing as a bit racist. It either is or it isn't. In this case it really isn't.

I guess I'm a product of the "all are equal even pink with green spots" generation, none of my relatives have ever implied anything was better re skin colour.

White people have the luxury of never having to think about race. You will never be targeted because of your race, you will never feel inferior because of your race, your race will never even be a topic of conversation because you will never have to fight for an identity, and you will never be told that your race isn't the standard beauty.

So you don't really have the right to say that you are the product of "all are equal" when you're at the top of the food chain so to speak.

Glad I could help Choochoo. .

It's a personal bugbear of mine. That we judge our beauty on the unrealistic standards of others. My mum is/was a beautiful woman - slim, large eyes, completely gorgeous in the face. But she never thought she was attractive because she was compared to her fairer SILs. She would wear makeup about 3 or 4 shades lighter to change her colouring.

I didn't know that past. Which products?

See squeaky... Growing up as the only "white" girl in a church of hundreds of black people until recent years I have actually been the minority and had to fight for an identity, esp when I chose to marry someone and had a few people accuse me of "stealing their men" it's not a very fair assumption is it?

I know exactly what it's like to be mocked for being different, just nobody called it racism when they did it to me.

SqueakySqueak You will never be targeted because of your race,

I got lost driving around in Bristol a few years ago. So I pulled down the window and asked a passer by for directions. I got slapped in the face and told to fuck off you white bitch...

Racism works all ways.

The whole notion about skin-deep beauty is, of course, superficial.

And someone posting something about how 'black is beautiful' smacks of low self-esteem more than anything else. Why else would they feel like they have to affirm this on a social media site? It's not like these silly memes are going to achieve significant cultural change. In fact, they're rather a target for mockery in the wider sphere - they can be likened to all those other FB affirmations reads her DM's posts for examples "I LEARNED THE HARD WAY THAT I CANNOT ALWAYS COUNT ON OTHERS..." "never take a pissed off woman for granted because she will fuck your world up..." "a smile costs nothing, but gives much, it enriches those who receive..." what a load of insecure rubbish.

Maybe it's a case of feeling like societally you're not allowed to say 'I'm white and I feel beautiful', whilst others are allowed to link their skin colour to their feeling of beauty. I get that it's not equal in that regard.

However, you won't get far in a conversation with that topic because it sounds, sadly, like something a racist person would say.

it's not a very fair assumption is it?

Yep. Still is.

Sorry you got discriminated against, but it wasn't racist. Racism is when a person gets to define another race. You got bullied, which isn't fun but it wasn't racism or "reverse racism".

At large you could still turn on the TV and see people that looked like you being represented. You could still go to the store and see people like you being represented. I'm not going to go on, you get it.

It's like a man talking about being abused. That doesn't make him a second class citizen, it means he just had an unfortunate set of circumstances.

Not to be harsh, but as a white person you are still considered default and the ideal standard. You living in a black community doesn't change that, nor does it give you the right to say what minorities can or cannot do. If anything it should give you empathy for what they are going through at large. If you think it was bad in just a little community, how do you think they feel in a society at large saying that about them.

You could just plug your ears and ignore it. Go to a different town to get a break. They don't get that luxury.

Hpw is it not racist if Someone assaults you whilst making direct reference to your skin colour? !

choochoo while no one should behave badly to you because of your race, you have to accept that you are of the privileged class - it's not the same. you will have been on the receiving end of countless privileges based on the colour of your skin

Racism works all ways.

No it doesn't. For the same reason sexism doesn't.

You cannot be sexist towards a man because men define the rules and still define where woman can go.

You were discriminated against. That's not racism. Racism is a systematic oppression that you will never have to feel.

^See squeaky... Growing up as the only "white" girl in a church of hundreds of black people until recent years I have actually been the minority and had to fight for an identity, esp when I chose to marry someone and had a few people accuse me of "stealing their men" it's not a very fair assumption is it?

I know exactly what it's like to be mocked for being different, just nobody called it racism when they did it to me.^

I get where you're coming from Choochoo.
When it's the other way around people choose to ignore it.
Its double standards.

what squeaky said

I find this sort of thinking strange. It's like you think black people are incapable of being just as bigotted and twatty as white people. Of course they are. The reason being, we're all the same.

sorry, i meant the post before. i think someone can be racist or sexist towards another person in the privileged group, but it's different because it's not institutionalised, it's not coming from a position of power, and it's far more likely to be a one-off case of discrimination rather than an endless pattern

Oh and it is perfectly possible to be sexist towards men. I give you the 'So simple, a man can do it' adverts from back in the day.

But does that mean it's ok in that case, Petula?

I find this sort of thinking strange. It's like you think black people are incapable of being just as bigotted and twatty as white people. Of course they are. The reason being, we're all the same.

I agree. It's ridiculous.
I also find it ridiculous in the extreme, to see posts such as 'Black is Beautiful'.
No they're not all beautiful. Some are ugly, some are plain, some are beautiful.
Same as any race.
And to say otherwise is being patronising, because you are implying that they don't exist as individuals.

I find this sort of thinking strange. It's like you think black people are incapable of being just as bigotted and twatty as white people. Of course they are.

Well yeah, everyone is capable of being an asshole.

But as Petula said, it's not a systematic thing. Women saying men are stupid doesn't stop them from getting jobs, equal pay, or even equal chances at promotions. When men say women are stupid or bad at something we have a majority of women unable to break into STEM fields.

That's the difference.

I felt very bullied at a previous workplace which had older black women running it.

They would all stick together and be quite rude to me even though I was friendly and respectful of everyone.

They used to say 'us black people have to stick together' and stuff like that. Was horrible to feel so excluded because of my colour.