AIBU to force DS into a pull up every night

[MrsSocks]

DS is 3 and a half and has been dry in the day since turning 2. We had a spell after turning 3 where he went a month or two of being dry at night and so didn't wear anything other than pjs. Now he's gone back to wetting every night. I've tried lifting him when we go to bed but he still ends up wet by morning. The problem is he HATES pull ups and nappies to the point where he is screaming when we try to put them on at night. He gets in a real state about it and even when we manage to fight one on him he takes it off again. We have waterproof sheets and the disposable pads in place to protect the mattress but it is still a massive disruption to everyone when he wets and we have to put dry sheets on and change pjs. Plus then getting him back to sleep is a nightmare. Is there any alternatives to the pull ups/nappies? Has no one invented a nice Spider-man absorbant onesie yet?? Am I being unreasonable is expect him to wear something he truly hates (says they hurt but I don't know how true that is. I buy him the age 4-7 pj pants so they r plenty big enough!)

I don't know of any alternatives to pull-ups, but one tip I read on here was double-sheeting the bed. 2 lots of waterproof sheets, pads and/or regular sheets. That way, if he has an accident you can take the top layer off, and you are left with a dry, made bed.

3 and a half is still very young though, so it does sound like he is just not old enough yet. Being dry at night is hormonal, so not something that you can train a child to do.

I'm sure you've tried every type of bribery to get him in pull ups. Would a completely different brand and design fool him?

I lift my DD...she'd hate to wear a pull up. But she's older than your son...so I'm not sure. Could you take him for a walking sleep wee? I do this nightly at 10.00pm and the bed is always dry in the morning.

Or what about cloth training pants?

There are cloth ones here, some info here, and some more here

We use adhesive absorbent pads called "Dry like me" (bit like a sanitary towel) for ds2 who is 4, has been toilet trained for ages but is not reliably dry at night. Available in the baby aisle with the nappies. Combined with lifting him before we go bed.

I used to teach an 8 year old bed wetter. He had no carbonated drinks, only milk or water. I don't think he was allowed to drink up to an hour before bed. It worked. Obviously I realise that is quite different to a 3 year old. Some drinks act as a diuretic. I would insist on the pull ups at night as it is better than waking up soaking wet and cold. How about a reward chart for putting them on?

Thanks everyone. Lol obfus

Yes we've tried different makes and designs. It doesn't bother me that he still wets as he's so young. I would just like to find an solution to it that suits everyone. I don't really want to make my son miserable and distraught every night by forcing a pull up on him. I do try lifting at night. He wees every time and sometime it's successful and he's dry by morning but more often than not he's weed again by the early hrs. He doesn't drink before bed so don't know where he finds it all!

browneyesblue great idea. Thanks for the links. I think a cloth pull ups maybe the only answer prepares dragons den pitch for absorbant onesies

bakingtins do they stick to underwear/pjs? Do they stay in place ok?

spanky good idea with the reward chart. Worth a try for sure

Can you sneak a nappy/pullup onto him when he's already asleep?

Double or triple making the bed is a brilliant as you can just whip the wet bedclothes off and it's nice and dry underneath. I just slept mine in underpants then it just a quick pants change.

If he has been dry it might be worth taking a urine sample to the do tors to see if he could have a bladder infection.

We used cloth night pants on ours and presented them as 'big girls pants just in case' - it worked.

Lifting makes no difference - we did it, but it's a pain because you can't do it at the same time every night as their bodies will adjust to that so you end up with no sleep pattern at all. With hindsight, I wouldn't have bothered.

I used to wait until dd was asleep and sneakily slip a pull up on her. Maybe do that for less stress all round?

I second purplepoodle's tip to double or even triple layer the bed. It makes it so much easier.

And FWIW, I was told to ditch the lifting.

By lifting you are encouraging the child to urinate while half asleep whereas you actually want the child to make sure he or she is wide awake and on the toilet before they wee!

Once we ditched the lifting and used the triple layer bed to make change overs swift and easy and hassle free for all concerned, DS was fully dry within a few weeks (from memory, it was quite a few years ago )

I think this is another one of those tricky parenting situations where the adage "this too shall pass" is very relevant. Hang in there.

I heard lifting was bad but DD hates a plastic sheet so much...she's a sweaty little thing and at 6 she'd be mortified at a pullup.

I do sometimes wonder if I just stopped lifting her, would she stay dry...I might try it.

Can someone explain what lifting is please?

liberal I think people are referring to toiletting children in there sleep just before the adults go to bed: it can help children stay dry all night.

when you lift them whilst theyre still asleep and put them on the toilet.
My kids went ballistic when that was tried with them, im against it as it set my weeing patterns at night as a kid and I have always had to get up at least once a night to wee.

biggest advice here is to increase the amount he is drinking in the day ++ and try and get him to wait a few minutes each time he needs a wee (give his brain/bladder time to recognise when it is full and allow the bladder to be stretched) also no juice from 2hrs before bed, only water.

my ds's in pullups till 7, tried this routine on ds2 who was showing no signs of being ready(soaked pullup every morning) and it worked within 2 weeks!! he was drinking at least a litre of water during school day and as much as I could get down his neck whilst at home! no accidents ever since.

MrsWinniebago, plastic sheets are not what they used to be (heck, I sound ancient!)
Decent quality ones don't rustle and increase sweating, not in my limited experience anyway. DS was and still is a very sweaty young man and he would never had coped with 2 or 3 on this bed if they been like that.

We also use the pads - DryLikeMe. They are just like sanitary pads and stick to the underwear. I usually use 2 at night- works a treat x

I have a nearly 7 year old who still can't manage more than 5 dry nights in a row.

I was told by ERICs charity, GP and health visitor not to lift. Done everything else she just can't do it, she is a very deep sleeper. All said heavily praise dry nights and calmly ignore wet nights. Start getting x many dry nights then small reward then start working on getting x many together hence how we have got to 5 but can't get further.

We have the bed double sheeted.

Every so often I get her to wear pull-ups eg. If we are away in a hotel or someone else's house and for periods of time at home. But for several years I have sold it to her as I need a break from all the washing and she would be doing me a big favour by doing it. She isn't keen but ok with doing it for short periods of time. I know the understanding is different as I have 2 younger ones but could this work?

It is a very frustrating process.

My 3yo ds also point blank refuses to put on the pull up at night - I simply put it on him when he is fast asleep...

Lifting and not waking the DC 'trains' them to sleep -pee.

They need to be woken up enough to know they are peeing. Otherwise the brain creates a dream where you are on the loo (when you're not ).

With predictable results.

Ah, thanks. Lifting my sleeping 3 year old onto the toilet and back into bed would never work for me, my back would break!

Mine's nowhere near ready for trying dry nights yet, she's dry in the day though, that was hard enough!