Maid, finding the unfairness offensive is the starting point for change
Hmm, I disagree, although it's probable that we don't have exactly the same idea of what "being offended" constitutes (who does?).
Finding the unfairness unfair and being able to vocalise that appropriately is, IMO, the starting point for change.
Claiming that the unfairness "offends" you is asking for change based on your own personal feelings (and may not, therefore, be shared by others), which I don't feel is a strong starting position for negotiation.
Example (for illustration, not to put words in your mouth):
Me: Job for job, women in my company should be paid the same as men, because that is fair. Anything less sends a message that my company does not value women equally.
You: Job for job, women in my company should be paid the same as men, because that is fair. Anything less sends a message that my company does not value women equally and that is offensive to me.
I don't really see what your final statement about you personally being offended adds to the assertion, if you see what I mean? If anything, I see it as an attempt to manipulate based on how society as a whole is apparently supposed to respond when someone claims to be offended i.e. by capitulating.