Oboes are superior to clarinets in every way.

[FatalCabbage]

When I am global dictator clarinet will simply be phased out with a bonfire.

Why anyone would choose to listen to the nasal whine of a clarinet instead of the heady song of an oboe is completely beyond me. Remove the clarinet section from an orchestra and nobody would notice or care. Remove the oboe and the joy would follow. And nobody would be able to tune up.

Which leads me to my other bugbear... Clarinets never ever sound properly tuned, and they slip even flatter within minutes of tuning.

They sound nasty, their reeds are weird and slimy, and they are frumpy. Mozart can FTFO too. Clarinet concerto = hell on earth.

Who's with me? FWIW trombones are stupid but sound bold, and saxophones at least have the cachet of jazz cool. Clarinets should have gone out of fashion decades ago.

Sorry unweaved, those are awful.
I can appreciate that they are very talented, and am thankful that they are playing something other than Three Blind Mice or London's Burning, but it still hurts my head.

Also agree that flutes sound dreadful too.

YABU. Listen to a decent recording of Mozart's clarinet concerto if you don't believe me.

Oboes are the best...

...though I quite like Dixieland clarinet

. How anyone can't think this is beautiful is beyond me. I love the sound of the oboe but I do play the clarinet (a bit) mainly because when I decided to learn oboes were prohibitively expensive. I am a recorder player though!

Leave off the violas! I've never played another instrument (professional viola player)

It's the most beautiful instrument!

Oboes are nasal and early musikcy. Mozart does sublime things with clarinets, and i say that as a cellist.

Bassoons are weird though.

I love cellos.

Oi! Less of the flute bashing (classically trained flautist here)

Ditch the violin. Nasty shrieky thing. Stupid high notes. And whoever learns them sounds crap for years and years and years.
Plus why oh why do they feel the need to fiddle (ha!) With them all the time? You try to chat and there they are, twanging away mucking about with rosin.

I love the clarinet and am grade 8.
I think we windies should all agree that we are better together and get rid of all strings

Flutes and oboes need a funny disapproved face to play them

Clarinet's rock jazz

Plus, if you're clever you can learn to play the clarinet then play the saxaphone without much trouble

Cat's bum mouth, that's what I meant

Flute rule.

The clarinet is depressing and whiney.

Clarinetists are generally rather dull.

Mozart's Clarinet Concerto is playing in the lift down to hell, to get you used to misery. I will hear no demur. All Mozart is Shit.

Violists are sexy, and other musicians are jealous. However they rightly reserve their full hatred for conductors and drummers (not percussionists, who are frighteningly talented and often sexy).

Recorders are a Thing Of Beauty (beyond thirty Year Four playing Jingle Bells in unison). On my Euromillions list is a full set of Yamaha recorders from bass to sopranino, and a proper soundproof studio to master them in. I've learned several instruments since, but when idly humming or composing I always finger recorder (steady).

I played the harp as a child. It meant I was a shoe in for the school orchestra because it looks pretty, and I had no rival players better than me. BUT it is a Nightmare instrument requiring two grown men to move it around the school on its trolley. Male teachers fled at my approach.

I shall advise my daughter to learn the oboe. Light, portable and one note at a time.

Wasn't jazz flute subject of much ridicule on a Mighty Boosh episode?

THERE

There is something sort of erotic about a cello though.

This is SUCH a niche AIBU. I'm loving it

I like a flute, myself. But I feel generally warm towards woodwind.

Love the oboe - I want 'Sheep may safely graze' on the oboe played at my funeral. And The Shepherd's Farewell has me in tears every Christmas.

I do like early music recorder music - anybody familiar with Red Priest's music? Takes recorder to a whole new level!

Oboe player here. The number of times I have seen the point of clarinets can be counted on the fingers of one hand. The oboe is a ridiculous instrument with its expensive double reeds and endless hissy fits but my goodness it sounds good when played right. Like a souped up violin. But the clarinet is to the saxophone what hot chocolate (the made with water kind) is to Green and Blacks.

I always thought woodwind instruments were called thus because they sounded noises that would be heard in the woods

If anything's to go from an orchestra, it's surely the saxophones. An instrument ending in -phone must be a gadget if not a TOY. They serve absolutely no purpose and are obnoxious.

HOWEVER - oboe is lovely, and French horn can be absolutely divine. As can a recorder! In a different life I'd like to be a professional recorder player.

The Oboe is beautiful as is the Viola. The Clarinet is boring and sounds it too!

Even a xylophone?

But the clarinet is to the saxophone what hot chocolate (the made with water kind) is to Green and Blacks.

Other way round.The clarinet has a soul.