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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To want my usually lovely friend to stop harrassing me about Forever Living

228 replies

Pestopastaagain · 14/07/2014 17:24

She has recently got involved with Forever Living. We used to be in touch every month or so via email, text or fb (We live opposite ends of the country) but since she has got involved with this it's every single day more or less. She sends chatty messages but always drops in 'Have you thought about it some more' 'They are really good products' etc. Another mutual friend told me she has also been emailing her the same thing, again and again and again. Mutual friend and I have both already told her we're not interested in becoming part of it but we wish her luck and hope it works out.

What has happened to our usually sane and lovely friend? It's impossible to have a conversation with her without Forever Living being mentioned repeatedly. It's like she has been taken over by a cult or something the way she keeps going on about it.

I looked into the company and it seems to be a MLM company. Some of the articles I have read make it seem like a very fine line between that and a pyramid scheme. A lot of people also saying they made no or very little money trying to sell inferior products at an inflated price.

She's not made any money yet but is playing a well off future down to them. Is she kidding herself, has anyone here been selling these products and made any money doing it?

OP posts:
Perfectlypurple · 15/07/2014 15:46

My point still remains that these products play on people's desperation. As soon as they go back to normal food the weight goes back on. It is better to address the issues behind the weight gain instead of kidding people it is a quick fix.

fridgepants · 15/07/2014 18:08

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the user's request.

TakeMeUpTheNorthMountain · 15/07/2014 18:52

I hate them and the way they turn people who sign up into vultures desperate for sales

As someone whohas had to forcibly eject them from nearly every arthritis support meet in the last year, I would say tell her fuck off

Aloe Vera does not fucking cure arthritis.

PerpendicularVincenzo · 15/07/2014 19:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsJossNaylor · 15/07/2014 19:14

A friend of mine who flogs the aloe Vera is currently doing the Clean 9 and posting bikini pix of herself online each day, to prove her "weight loss."

Only problem is, she's taking them from increasingly flattering angles and clearly breathing in.

If the stuff doesn't work for the obsessives who sell it (who do have the weight to lose, I should add) I don't hold out much hope for the rest of us.

specialsubject · 15/07/2014 20:21

I usually work on the basis that anything that needs to be advertised isn't much good. The more advertising and heavy sales needed, the worse the product.

examples: miracle skin creams (none have any effect on wrinkles), diet products (none work, eating less and moving more works).

anyone got any examples to disprove this?

pluCaChange · 15/07/2014 20:35

It does, however, surprise me that people who do not work in MLM are seen as better informed about it than someone who does.

As I said, it's perfectly reasonable for potential/ targeted/ non clients to have an opinion on how they are marketed to, and perverse pricing of products. That is what many people in this discussion are experts on, being marketed to.

carlywurly · 15/07/2014 20:37

Yanbu - I have a couple of friends who have turned into utter herbal life and body by vi Facebook bores.

I know I've lost 2 stone and toned up without any shakes or meal replacement crap. The exercise I've done - weights, running and Pilates has been free. The food has been healthy and varied.

My way feels sustainable - nothing about a shake diet does. It is all highly suspect and the level of evangelism the sellers display gives me the creeps.

maggiethemagpie · 15/07/2014 20:38

I had this with Herbalife, I did the diet and lost some weight, they then tried to pressurise me into becoming a distributor and harassing everyone I knew. They said I had to put out messages on facebook and could only post messages that were consistent with my new lifestyle. Bollocks to that, I stopped the diet at that point and ran a mile.

Halalhaminnit · 15/07/2014 21:33

It may well be legal and above board. But these MLMs suck the soul out of people. They work by essentially brainwashing all of their participants into believing that if only they work long and hard at it they too can have financial freedom. Participants and led to believe that they are building their own "business" when really they are just making the people at the top even richer. They will give you fancy names and titles and participants are encouraged strongly to surround themselves with positive people and directed to the whole weird psycho-babble personal development industry - so you end up forking out even more money to buy the self help/positive thinking merchandise that you need to keep you brain washed into thinking you are the next success story.

When you first sign up you are encouraged to sign up all your family and friends and build your team.

I'm not talking about any one of these MLMs in particular, but most have the same basic MO and I know someone who was and still is completely sucked into it. It is very cult like - very scary. Once someone is in their clutches it's very difficult to get them back. Maybe, because they don't want to admit that they failed (after harassing everyone they ever met!) or because they truly believe that if they just try that bit harder they will "make it". Quite sad really.

AllHailTheBigPurpleOne · 15/07/2014 21:38

Sympathies op. Nothing worse than being targeted by a mate.
I've recently lost a friend to Arbonne. She kept going on
And on and on about everyone needing products and how it definitely WASN'T a pyramid scheme, and £1500,
And the chance to get a white Mercedes, and £1500 and becoming a something or other manager and £1500 before giving me some baby bath that cost £20 and smelled like Matey.

It was all she ever put on Facebook. Arbonne Arbonne Arbonne.

I stopped answering her calls.

maggiethemagpie · 15/07/2014 21:39

I do agree there was a cult like feeling to the herbalife people I knew. One actually told me that joining herbalife was like falling in love.
I think that says it all really.

Agree that a lot of the time they do not want to admit they've been hoodwinked, so it is easier to keep the delusion going.

7Days · 15/07/2014 21:48

Do they actually try to tell you what to post on your own FB, maggie ?that's shocking! But explains a lot

AgaPanthers · 15/07/2014 21:57

Apparently the thing is 'fake it till you make it'. In other words, you have to act like you are rich, and spend loads of money and boast about earnings and holidays and such like, even if it isn't true (because, they say, if you do that it will come true). That's how you sucker others in.

Halalhaminnit · 15/07/2014 22:13

You can normally tell if any of your friends and family members or partner have been suckered into it- lots of motivational fb status's, a cd of zig zigler (sp?) on pretty much all the time, on iPod or in the car. Espousing the virtues of The Secret to anyone who will listen. Best one is when people you've known for ages give you a wide berth cos your friend/partner/family member has been boring the tits off them about whatever it is they are trying to flog!

fuzzpig · 16/07/2014 18:15

YANBU it's really dull and annoying. I still give the woman who kept cornering me about her business (Mona Vie - something drink related) a wide berth.

Aleksandra034 · 17/07/2014 20:29

I have been tending to two poorly children so have only now seen some of the new posts on this thread.

In the interest of fairness to the topic discussed, I want to clear up a couple of points. Again I repeat I am absolutely not promoting my own business on here, in fact an online forum would be the last place I'd ever look for clients or, God forbid, team members. My response is purely because it's not nice to leave a thread full of incorrect or incomplete information.

It is NOT TRUE that in a reputable network marketing company you simply get paid for "signing somebody up" into the business. Absolutely not the case. Anyone making an assumption that the person who is speaking to them is unable to make any sales, and is therefore looking for other people to just sign up, is making an incorrect and illogical assumption. Every penny paid, through commissions, royalties or bonuses, is based on real achieved sales (by all parties relevant). No sales, no pay (and the levels are not low, either). Please do not spread incorrect rumours.

AgaPanthers challenged me when I called our company a reputable company. Here is why I say it is so: Herbalife is a 7 BILLION dollar company, the biggest nutrition company on the planet, quoted on the New York stock exchange, the official nutrition sponsor to David Beckham, Christiano Ronaldo, a whole host of Olympic gold winners etc. Its scientific board consists of 100% medical doctors, including a Nobel Prize winner, Dr Louis Ignarro. They have been thriving for over 30 years and will undoubtedly continue to thrive for many more, despite AgaPanthers' opinion of them (but you can't be popular with everyone).

Recently, an investigation has been started against them by the FTC in America. This is the result of a report produced in Dec 2012 by a man called Bill Ackman, an American billionaire hedge fund manager, in which he criticised some of the alleged business practices in Herbalife. Bill Ackman has publicly placed a 1 billion dollar stock market bet against Herbalife (something called a "short") which means that if he manages to drive their shares to zero, he will earn an unimaginable amount of money. Still, in 2013, Herbalife's shares went up by 140%, despite Ackman's relentless lobbying against it, which includes numerous Internet websites which claim to 'tell truth about Herbalife' and other such, and which on close reading make a full disclosure of being run by Pershing Capital (the company he is the CEO of). In 2013, Herbalife share prices have fallen some 30% so far, still leaving them way ahead. Market estimates of his loss so far, in this battle, range from 200-500 million dollars. Needless to say, he will be applying as much pressure on the company and the FTC as he can.

Investigation does not equal guilt. Investigation, on the contrary, is an excellent opportunity to clear your name and Herbalife have welcomed the investigation, for exactly those reasons. In fact, Ackman's own first company Gotham was investigated for trading practices in 2003 so he should know all about that.

As the CEO of Herbalife said, this is a temporary distraction.

Many of you have complained about the actions of a distributor you've come across. If you come across someone who you believe is making "outrageous health claims" for their product, report them to the company. They should not be doing that and their licence should be withdrawn. If it's a friend whose behaviour is annoying you, surely you could try giving them some benefit of the doubt? They are trying to change their life for better. Why not support them, or at least wish them well???? If you really are their friend. Or the least you could do, is be honest with them, not just bitch about them on an online forum (sorry, OP, I don't mean you). I'm sure they will be mortified to hear they have upset you. I'm sure they will try to amend their behaviour. No one wants to make enemies on purpose.

Our company does not advocate any particular rate of weight loss, certainly not 2-3 kg per week. If you know someone who is making this claim, warn them that it's against NHS guidelines and most likely against their own company's policy to say that. They could lose their licence over that.

If you don't like the idea of shakes, no problem. Find something else, which works for you. There are so many things out there.

If you don't like when your friend puts on Facebook about how nice it is to work from a park on a sunny day, don't follow their posts.

If you have come across one or even several people who are in network marketing, who have annoyed you, it's understandable that you are annoyed but there is no need to tarnish an entire industry, which comprises lots of different companies with literally millions of distributors (almost 2 million just in Herbalife), with the same brush.

maggiethemagpie · 17/07/2014 20:36

7Days they did actually tell someone off for posting on fb that they'd been to the pub and got pissed as it was 'inconsistent with herbalife'. This was on his own personal facebook page. They wanted us to text friends, put updates on fb, all in the name of 'the cause'. I think maybe their strategy was to get people to either convert their friends or lose them, then they'd have to buy into the cult as they wouldn't have any of their old friends left!

7Days · 17/07/2014 20:40

That is pretty cult like.

londonrach · 17/07/2014 20:43

Very dangerous...

Rokenswife · 17/07/2014 20:56

The 'fake it till you make it' thing rings bells with me. Someone I know who does FL is constantly posting pics of 'my office' and 'my life plan' and always goes on about the various holidays she's going on (they never seem to happen).

Oh and when I posted on FB about my goldfish being at death's door, she commented that some aloe Vera gel in its water would cure it - I still burst into giggles randomly about that one.

Aleksandra034 · 17/07/2014 21:00

maggiethemagpie LOL :-)

Who is 'they' you're referring to? I assume you're talking about the famous Herbalife Mafia, yes?

I don't know if you know this - and I don't mean to scare you - but they actually search the Internet for exactly your type of post, and then they come to your house at night and eat you alive! But you will of course be given the opportunity to convert to the cult first (if you don't mind drinking blood?)...

MerdeAlor · 17/07/2014 21:07

If you don't like when your friend puts on Facebook about how nice it is to work from a park on a sunny day, don't follow their posts

How odd that you write that Aleksandra that was the exact post from my FL friend today on FB, saying how nice it was to work from the park. Coincidence? Hmm

You haven't addressed our worries about people being brainwashed by these things. Don't you understand? We are saying they are disturbing to witness.

maggiethemagpie · 17/07/2014 21:25

Aleksandra - I thought they don't eat anything apart from HL bars and shakes? So I'm safe.

I'm talking about a particular HL wellness centre group of people. I won't say where they are located.

Not sure how you can actually disprove what I was told if you weren't there.....

TiredFeet · 18/07/2014 02:44

aleksandra if your claims about the hedge fund chap are correct then actually it doesn't help your case at all. He won't have staked that much money on a whim, they rely on vast amounts of research before making decisions