To not be surprised that divorce rates are so high when I see how some friends treat their husbands??

[PisforPeter]

Just having huge arguments over petty issues, being anal about the childrens routines, making DH sleep in spare room for duration of oregnancy & first 8 months of baby's life too.
Do folk need to chill out a bit or am I being too harsh??
I just find a team approach works better for me??

[AnyFucker]

arethereanyleftatall fret not

joy and I do agree sometimes. I don't think we have ever "met in the middle" though

[TheRealAmandaClarke]

Well quite AF

[Ragwort]

I do think a lot of couples seem to get married without much thought/preparation - people seem more obsessed about the wedding day rather than discussing dull but practical issues like attitudes to finance/children/housework etc.

(DH and I have always slept separately and recently celebrated our 25th anniversary ).

[IamSlave]

I think there is lots of divorce because people can and also there seems to be little trust these days...

no one on here anyway wants to share their money, so why bother?

[PisforPeter]

I might work in marriage guidance, I might not, I could be a bin woman or the fricking PM but I do think that some people on here need to lighten up.
I might name change tomorrow but before that I'm going to have a damn good curry & a bottle of red with DH & heaven forbid we may even have sex later.
I suppose I should be ashamed of that & consider myself a Stepford Wife.
Laters

[CaptChaos]

Have fun name changing.

Glad that you don't work in Marriage Guidance. Someone with your attitudes would be downright dangerous.

[missymayhemsmum]

We-ell when I divorced my husband in my mid 20s I thought it was because he was an irresponsible piss-artist. Now I can see it was because he was a depressed irresponsible piss artist and I was a screaming control freak-both of use reacting to too little sleep, not enough space and too little money!

[MrsRambo]

I think the OP is a man. A man called Peter who isn't best pleased with his wife at the moment. It's one of those reverse threadies.

[settingsitting]

She is a woman on her other thread.

[PosingInManilla]

Worra knobhead.

[ThatBloodyWoman]

Crashed and burned, op.

Crashed and burned,

[7Days]

you think thats why you should be ashamed?


you poor little fool

[angryangryyoungwoman]

You are being sexist rather than unreasonable. But you know that, right?

[TucsonGirl]

I know some women who treat their husbands very badly, like children in many ways. Or just see them as a sourcce of money. But I don't think it's that prevalent. I know far more women that just marry idiots and I don't understand for the life of me what they are thinking.

[Pumpkinpositive]

PisforPeter, you sound like my auntie.

You wouldn't happen to have a psychology degree and live ... elsewhere, would you?

But then, if you are my auntie, you'd be onto husband no 2.

[thecakeisalieagain]

I must watch out for signs of divorce then. My poor dh has to sleep in the spare room as I favour our 13 week old dc3 for company. We barely any intimacy at the moment. The house is far messier than usual. He has to cook dinner and put our older 2 kids to bed some nights.

I know I'm being so unreasonable letting him get a good nights sleep while I bf and co-sleep with the baby. Also expecting him to be a grown up about the temporary chaos and lack of sex. Not forgetting making him parent his own kids. Bad wife!

I will await the divorce papers and try 'working as a team' next time by giving him bj's on request and subjecting us both to horrendous sleep deprivation so we might share a bed. Thanks so much for your enlightening advice.

[KeepOnPloddingOn]

What the hell is a 'starter' wedding! ?

[TheRealAmandaClarke]

Don't you think by 13 weeks you should have got back to normal?
At least you've been warned, you might have time to set things straight -phew!


Congratulations on your baby. scrummy.

[TheRealAmandaClarke]

Its like an appetiser, to warm you up for the main event.

[SaVred]

It is not an appetiser. It is a repulser. Makes u realise what is really important. First marriages often attempts to conform , please others , appear happy.

A second marriage has a better chance of being about compatability

[LittlePeaPod]

There is an actual online dictionary definition for a Starter Wedding

Definition - a first marriage that lasts under five years and produces no children, where divorce is expected to "trade up" to someone better.

dictionary.reference.com/browse/starter+marriage

ha ha ha ha ha

[Ratbagcatbag]

Well I'm double evil and dh has only just figured it out.

Dd still doesn't sleep through so we take turns doing get ups (and co sleeping after about 4am). He's only just realised that the rota that I completely frigged in my favour means when it's his get ups, dss is at his mums so I helpfully go get 8 hours uninterrupted bliss sleep, but on my get ups dss is generally here so he ends up being woken and occasionally helps me on my resettles. Shit, ill be getting divorced shortly.

[thecakeisalieagain]

Thanks TheRealAmandaClarke she is an absolutely scrummy baby. Although as you say things should be back to normal by now I suspect dd is manipulating me and I'm making a rod for my own back or some such nonsense...

[TheRealAmandaClarke]

At three months I was still in n mummy fog- baby brain heaven. Yummy yum.

[poppytripll]

Yabu op. Glad you have a perfect marriage, but I think you sound far too naive smug to provide insight on where the rest of us are going wrong.