Was DH unreasonable, or not?

[Misfitless]

I'm going to stick to the bare facts...

We had a pest control person in our house. My DH and I were talking with him. He mentioned that he had had a call out about fleas earlier in the week (a flea infestation, I assume.)

I said "Oh, our dog's got fleas," to which my DH said "No she hasn't. Why are you making up stories?"

Your thoughts, please.

"I'm sorry if what I said upset you...I didn't mean to upset you."

The implication of this comment being

"It was perfectly acceptable for me to accuse you of making up stories as if you were a naughty three year old and I could never have reasonably predicted that this would upset you. Therefore, I am not sorry that I said it, I am just sorry that you were upset by it."

He clearly believes that he is your superior.

posters are not "missing the point" (on the whole)

it's been pretty comprehensively cleared up now that he was a prick for talking to her like that

there is just the matter of the pest control person's presence in the house to resolve and we can all get on with our day

I am sure that the reasons for the presence of the Pest Control Person may shed some light why the DH would have said such a thing (although not the wording - he was a prick for that).

I don't think we will find out though.

"I'm sorry if what I said upset you...I didn't mean to upset you."

I know that on the face of it, that seems like a completely reasonable response, but if you were in the room I'm sure you'd understand.

Sounds totally adequate to me.

Of course, self flagellation and hari kiri would be the preferred options but make a terrible mess of the carpet, I find.

Is your husband rather protective of the dog, OP? Is the dog his baby?

Please come back OP! I want to hear about the sexy pest control man!

And why you haven't flea treated your dog.

YABU for using Frontline. It's not as effective anymore (check with the vets - they'll agree). Move to stronghold or advantage as they'll deal with the problem better.

YANBU with regards to the way he spoke to you. It doesn't matter if it was in front if someone else. Either you're his wife and therefore his partner/equal or you need to have a big conversation, prefers long with someone refereeing I he truly has a problem with you having differing opinions.

But where was Sharon?

Hi everyone,

Sorry, haven't been able to get online since my last post. I wasn't intentionally ignoring anyone.

OK - the pest control man was here because next door had been having problems with rats, and we were trying to take necessary precautions to prevent having the same problem.

At the time, through the red mist, I was assuming that everyone would think I was especially scuzzy - dog with fleas and potential rat problems, but with hindsight, I think that people were more interested in whether or not DH had reason to feel insecure about the pest control man, perhaps? .

DH has acknowledged that he was a total arse for speaking to me like that. It did drag up a whole load of stuff from in excess of 10 years ago, that I hadn't felt for a long, long time, which is why I was so livid with him, and very reluctant to accept his apology.

Dog and rest of the family are all fine... no rats, fleas or further knobhead comments from DH to report!