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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To serve guests instant coffee

588 replies

Drinkingpimmsinmygarden · 06/07/2014 17:57

DH and I aren't really coffee drinkers (prefer tea)so we just have a jar of instant coffee such as Nescafé. No real ground coffee.

Are we being unreasonable not to have 'proper' coffee in for guests?

OP posts:
OnlyLovers · 09/07/2014 11:05

Jayne, but a lot of people here are up in arms at the perceived 'snobbishness' of people who are really just saying they have a preference for real over instant coffee.

Hardly anyone has said they'd turn their nose up if offered instant coffee. Most people would either opt for something else instead, or do as you do with drinks at a wedding and drink a little bit politely.

I'm just annoyed at the YOU FECKING SNOB WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE AR YOU TOO GOOD FOR INSTANT COFFEE tone of some of the posts on here.

lainiekazan · 09/07/2014 11:08

I'm with you, Jane.

No one makes coffee quite like I do - instant or real. I even have to have it in my mug (yep, that's another tick in the old person box).

Agree re champagne at weddings. I was on a table last year with someone who made an awful fuss about being served champagne for the toast. The waiter hissed, "It's for the toast - you don't have to drink it." Probably rather unprofessional but I felt his pain.

2rebecca · 09/07/2014 11:21

I think the small cafetieres just do 1 mug of coffee and I usually use a rounded tablespoon of ground coffee in them although that varies with the brand and type of coffee, the larger cafetiere does 2-3 mugs and then we have a larger one that says it does 12 cups but that's 4-5 mugs if we have guests.
At work we use filter coffee but my colleagues like it stronger than me so I usually have half a mug of coffee and top up to taste with boiled water.
Stewed filter coffee is horrible though and starts to smell awful.

tiredandsadmum · 09/07/2014 11:22

Love that waiter - fabulous :) Hope he kept his job.

digdeepforanswers · 09/07/2014 11:30

My posh sister once took us out to a nearby cafe for coffee (as visitors to here home)

motheroftwoboys · 09/07/2014 11:48

Day off work. Sitting in the son. This is making me smile. 57 living in the north pretty ordinary sort I would reckon. Love coffee. Hate tea. Have cafetiere, two sizes of stovetop and an Nespresso. Fresh grind machine at work. Wouldn't touch instant yet DH genuinely doesn't care and drinks Tesco version of Gold Blend. Can't imagine ever being offered instant at a friends. Surely, with the huge number of good quality coffee shops opening all the time the norm is now for proper coffee?

FraidyCat · 09/07/2014 11:55

"Coffee" in a dometic context in the UK means instant. Calling the alternative "real" can be insulting and make you sound like a snob. If you were in Italy or the USA that terminology would be acceptable, because there the word "coffee" doesn't mean instant.

Instant coffee is 100% made from coffee beans, it's just a different method of getting from bean to cup. It's as "real" as any other type.

I drink both, but of the three places where I'm most likey to drink coffee, two of them commercial, the instant is considerably nicer than the alternative/s.

I'm off to reevaluate coffee bags, haven't had them in a long time.

OnlyLovers · 09/07/2014 11:58

"Coffee" in a dometic context in the UK means instant.

That's a bit of a blanket assertion, isn't it? This thread seems to indicate that to a lot of people, coffee means real coffee. And you can argue the semantics of 'instant' v 'real' all day long, but common sense suggests that the two terms are just a useful way of distinguishing two types of coffee from one another and using them doesn't necessarily imply a value judgement.

TheWomanTheyCallJayne · 09/07/2014 12:02

I'm amazed by the amount of people who buy coffee (made, from coffee shops) often every day, sometimes more than once.
That would be my food money for the day gone!

2rebecca · 09/07/2014 12:39

I'd recommend the Asda single coffee filters I mentioned earlier over coffee bags. I find I have to squash coffee bags a bit to get the flavour out and often end up bursting them.

2rebecca · 09/07/2014 12:46

The filters have cardboard hooks that balance on the top of your mug. You tear along a dotted line, balance it on your mug, pour water in to the top and let it drain a couple of times and then put the filter in the foil pack it came in and chuck it in the bin or put the filter straight in the compost bin. It's more stable on the top of the mug than it sounds as there's a cardboard strip all the way round.

MrsCakesPremonition · 09/07/2014 13:19

When 77% of coffee bought for home consumption is instant - then yes, instant coffee is absolutely the norm in the UK.

FFSFFS · 09/07/2014 16:05

I like instant but I also like real coffee. I use either a one cup percolator or an insulated 4 cup percolator (both from John Lewis). It's almost as quick as instant. I also use one of those automatic milk frothers that heats the milk if I am doing cappuchinos or want a milky coffee.

I don't have any coffee angst Smile

To serve guests instant coffee
SignYourName · 09/07/2014 16:15

I still don't get why there is this "snob" idea when real coffee is drunk by everyone where instant isn't popular

It's not having a preference which makes someone a snob, it is being dismissive, rude or insulting about someone else's preference or insinuating that it is inferior to theirs. Some people - not the majority, by any means - have done exactly that on this thread, by using the words and phrases I quoted upthread. Then other people have come along and assumed incorrectly that they are being called a snob for simply having a preference.

MrsShortFuse2 · 09/07/2014 16:47

You can't lump all instant coffees together though. Nestlé Alta Rica or Espresso is very good and close to the real thing whereas some instant brands especially non-gold varieties are horrible.

2rebecca · 09/07/2014 18:31

I do think instant coffee is inferior to ground coffee. The people who drink it aren't inferior to the people who drink ground coffee but pretending that it isn't an inferior product is like saying orange juice made from concentrate isn't inferior to orange juice made from squeezed oranges. Some things are better than other things.

I accept there may be some nice instants I haven't tried.

OnlyLovers · 09/07/2014 18:39

As a bit of an aside, what exactly IS instant espresso and is it actually like real coffee? How do you use it?

And I've only just noticed –Instant tea? what's that?!?!

Mintyy · 09/07/2014 18:41

I think instant coffee is inferior to ground coffee, but I still drink it (and prefer it to no coffee) and understand that lots of other people drink it.

I think, generally, Spanish wine is inferior to French wine.

I think margarine is hugely inferior to butter.

I think white bread is inferior to wholemeal bread (most of the time).

Doesn't mean I can't get my head round other people eating or enjoying those things.

blubirdy · 09/07/2014 19:24

"Coffee" in a dometic context in the UK means instant. Calling the alternative "real" can be insulting and make you sound like a snob. If you were in Italy or the USA that terminology would be acceptable, because there the word "coffee" doesn't mean instant.

Language evolves. When my granddad was a child to be gay was to be happy. As is obvious from this thread, the word "coffee" is at this moment in time in the UK going through its transition phase from in the past it meant instant, now it's a bit of a muddle, in a decade or so the standard meaning of coffee in the UK will be "proper" "real" or if you'd rather "non-instant". If you find that insulting, then you had better find a way to make language static.

blubirdy · 09/07/2014 19:26

Instant coffee is 100% made from coffee beans, it's just a different method of getting from bean to cup. It's as "real" as any other type.

yes, indeed, definitely, instant coffee is as much real coffee as SMASH instant mashed potatoes are (were?) real potatoes.

Flipflops7 · 09/07/2014 19:47

SignYourName, I'm the one who should be banging my head as we went over all the rudeness and terminology arguments yesterday. People are only saying these things because this is an AIBU thread on MN. They are not voicing snobbish sentiments .

Claybury · 09/07/2014 21:02

Like my mother I have a small jar of instant coffee in the cupboard for tradesmen ( very MN surely...)- I wouldn't dream of offering it to friends.

I helped my SIL ( who I am not close to ) choose a coffee machine because she likes the coffee at my house so much. We always make the effort to make guests a good coffee. So I was really unimpressed when she made me instant coffee at her house because ' it is quicker '. The effort is apparently only worthwhile for certain guests , not me.

FFSFFS · 09/07/2014 21:08

MrsShortFuse2
You can't lump all instant coffees together though. Nestlé Alta Rica or Espresso is very good and close to the real thing whereas some instant brands especially non-gold varieties are horrible

This is So true I drink Nestle Expresso instant coffee. I love it and think its a much nicer cup of coffee than that served in some of the big chain coffee shops. It's nothing like some of the 'cheaper' brands. I wait until there is a special offer and stock up.

To serve guests instant coffee
OnlyLovers · 09/07/2014 21:11

Claybury, so essentially your SIL treats you the way you treat 'tradesmen' - as a lesser class of visitor.

One might say that was karma in action.

mommy2ash · 09/07/2014 21:23

i don't know a single person who owns a coffee machine and in any house i have ever visited if you are asked if you want coffee it is instant. i thought maybe i was out of the loop a bit and asked a few friends and they had the same experience as me. i guess ireland hasn't quite caught up yet lol