Neighbour and police

[Clairesafatgirlsname]

This is more of a what would you do/say?
A couple of weeks ago, my neighbour popped round (I don't know why) I was at work and DC were with my friend at her house. For some reason, and because no body answered the door, he assumed my children were alone and called the police. I had a visit from a PCSO about 10 minutes after getting home. This weekend I'm looking after a friends dog, she's been out in the garden so I suppose he's seen her. He came round yesterday and when he rang the bell, the dog began to bark, I put her in her cage, to answer the door, which took about 10-12 seconds but when I got to the door, there was no one there. The children, who were in the living room said 'that was the man from next door' so I went over and he told me he had come round to see if we had a new dog and say hello, he heard the children and because no one answered, he called the police. Would you have called the police in this situation? I don't think he was being unreasonable, but this all happened in a couple of minutes, I'm a bit worried about going to work this week in case he calls them again for whatever reason and I'm not home to deal with it. I should also mention, I told his wife last week that I'd have a dog in the house this weekend. WWYD?

OP plse report both to the police and to your military family support, I would also speak to his wife.
My DP is military and recently returned from a dusty place, for the first 4 weeks I swear he could hear an ant crawl across the ground, he was hyper alert and processing things in a worst case senario, tbh I think it was a form of PTSD. he is fine now but choose to go to military debriefs and get pissed with the lads Honestly this man needs help and you need to enjoy your home report him
It is not the easy thing to do but it is right for your DC to know they are ok to go out, to make noise and not expect police or MP's to arrive at the door

Thank you all so much for your advice, lots of things I hadn't thought of and didn't know. I will go to welfare in the morning and have written everything down. Thanks to all your helpful words, I won't feel silly doing it!
Canyou, that's awful, I'm glad your dp is better now.

Ring 101 and explain that your crazy neighbour keeps calling the police on you. I would go round there and tell him to get a new hobby. What a twat.

I do wonder if hes got a mental issue/hearing voices type thing - I had a flatmate who used to go on about next doors noise and their malicious behaviour for a few months before other hallucinations kicked in and it became apparent she was paranoid, hearing voices and having delusions of persecution. None of the rest of us had ever heard any issues with noise next door, and had been calming her down/smoothing over her odd behaviour to the neighbours for months before we realised she had probably been hallucinating. It was great to go and speak to them and apologise/explain when we finally got her help.

And very strange not answering the door on his time frame - you could have been in the shower/not dressed/have mobility issues/be changing a child/on an important phone call - a million reasons why you couldnt be there instantly: seems odd behaviour, unrealistic expectations

Can I clarify, the first time he called around you're children were at your home, being looked after by your friend who undrstandably didn't answer the door or was there no one home because you were at work and your children were at your friend's house? Sorry, I got hung up on that detail, it confused me. Either way his actions are strange. Is this neighbour elderly by any chance?

RTFT Rainbunny

Third- Sorry, for some reason only the first twenty posts were showing, I can now see the whole thread. Thanks for your patience.

Yes to welfare, they can put the Army side of life into motion.

My DH has PTSD from his Army career, hyper vigilance, paranoia, being on high alert all the time are all symptoms.

Canyou I'm really really glad your DH got better. It's actually pretty common and completely understandable for people to struggle with hyper vigilance and other PTSD markers for a number of weeks s when they return, That's why they run the debriefing sessions. The vast majority return to normal within weeks as they readjust to day to day life. It is when that doesn't happen that it becomes PTSD.

My dh also went to all the debriefs after his tours, went out with the lads, did the usual he always did after tour. He had always been ok -until his eleventh op tour, he did everything as before but he couldn't return to normal. That's when it stopped being 'difficulty readjusting to normal life' and became 'PTSD'. I am so so glad your dh is fine again, I'm sure those weeks were incredibly difficult for you both.

Sorry for the hijack OP. Welfare can contact his Welfare, they also have powers to address this under the terms of his licence to occupy and through his chain of command. Whilst the Police can only address criminal issues, the Army have another mountain of regs they can use. Keep 101 in the loop but my first port of call would be Welfare.

He sounds a knob. I lived next door to an ex warrant officer who had major mental health and alcohol problems. It wasn't nice, and could have escalated quite easily except for the fact that he (conveniently for me) died. This knob was nice to my face, and to that of my DH but to everyone else he was saying the most vile things and he seemed to have fabricated a whole new life for me which was (to others initially) very plausible. Luckily though, even someone who did not like me in the slightest realised that there was no way I would do what he was suggesting I was doing and I'd be lying if I didn't say it was a relief when he died. Get welfare involved and on side, it's not nice esp if your DH is away. Weirdly my NDNK thought it important that I visit him before he died. No idea what that was about, I was too busy getting on with my v happy life.

Sorry Claire, forgot to say no you're NBU.