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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

'Why isn't my child Mary' syndrome

378 replies

Pud2 · 05/07/2014 14:41

AIBU to get irritated by parents who complain to the school when their DC doesn't get a good part in a production?

OP posts:
MammaTJ · 05/07/2014 14:47

It depends. If the Chair of the PTAs DD always gets the main part, it is the only speaking role and everyone else is just scenery, then it is annoying. If there are loads of smaller parts, with one line each I don't know how the hell my DC's school does it, then YANBU.

Heels99 · 05/07/2014 14:48

But does anyone actually do that? I think it is a myth. Nobody is bothered at our school.mary is usually a non speaking part and given to a shyer child

awsomer · 05/07/2014 14:48

How old are the DC in question?
As a Primary teacher I can assure you that most of the time parts are not allocated based on any kind of acting skill. It's much more a case of: X has a louder voice, Y could do with the confidence boost, Z is a bit taller than some so could be the 'adult' role, etc.

tunnocksteacake · 05/07/2014 14:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

frames · 05/07/2014 14:51

All school governors including parent ones get front row seats at productions. The rest of us can't see a thing.

honeybeeridiculous · 05/07/2014 14:51

It can be annoying. When my son was in infant school there was a boy who always had the main part in Christmas productions aswell as any other shows put on the rest of the year. His mum was a teacher at the same school Hmm he's in prison now but that's a different story

awsomer · 05/07/2014 14:51

Although saying that I do remember being devastated as a child when the part of Ariel (the Little Mermaid) went to a child whose mum offered to sew and donate all the mermaid costumes. Being given the role of Ariel's sister was a very poor second!

Stratter5 · 05/07/2014 14:51

I was Mary every year, apart from 2 stints as the Angel Gabriel.

The joys of being blonde and angelic looking.

thecageisfull · 05/07/2014 14:52

In dds class a teachers child has had the main part in every play they've done so far. She does do drama and dance outside of school but it is still shitty for the other kids.

SetPhasersTaeMalkie · 05/07/2014 15:10

I was a bit like you stratter5. ( is that you stratters? )

I usually got the main part in school plays and shows. DS has had a pretty similar experience. I'm not on the PTA or any other kind of school committee.

I think we both have loud voices and big smiles otherwise I don't know.

SconeRhymesWithGone · 05/07/2014 15:13

Mary was blonde?

Sicaq · 05/07/2014 15:14

As an aside, why did Mary always go to a blue eyed blonde? Mary would have been dark haired and olive skinned (not at ALL bitter, me. Nope. Cough)

blueballoon79 · 05/07/2014 15:18

I always used to wonder why Mary was always played by blonde children. She'd have been a brunette!

Chippednailvarnish · 05/07/2014 15:23

As the proud mother of sheep no 5 and pig no 6, I really don't care!

When the Dc's are bothered, I might be. YANBU.

mercifulgibbon · 05/07/2014 15:24

I like your style tunnocks Grin

Tommy · 05/07/2014 15:24

there ARE parents like that and I'm always amazed at the cheek - maybe that's why they get their way as the teachers are Shock

SarahAndFuck · 05/07/2014 15:29

I called my DS Joseph as well tunnock, and the buggers still won't give him the leading role.

Half the work done for them already! What more do the want!? They can't say I wasn't thinking ahead for them. [anger] Grin

Last year though, he was 'Best and Most Important King' and gave the best gift and looked the most handsome. And we still have plenty of time for world domination the leading role. He doesn't even leave foundation stage for another two weeks Grin

ComposHat · 05/07/2014 15:37

Yes and poor little Herod and Balthazar seem to get typecast too.

whyamisoupsetoveragown · 05/07/2014 15:40

It's July Confused

MuttonCadet · 05/07/2014 15:42

Yes, I was the blonde haired, blued eyed, nice speaking voiced Mary in the first 3 years of primary.

Never really thought about whether it was fair or not, (clearly it's not Blush).

Goldmandra · 05/07/2014 15:50

There was a governor's child in my DD1's year who got the biggest part in everything. Everybody was painfully aware and it didn't help that he was also an unpleasant and disruptive child.

When my DD2 went through the same school she was picked for most things and others never got a look in. She was a very good loud speaker but I'm sure she wasn't the only one who could have done it. It felt very unfair and I felt very uncomfortable about it.

I really don't know why schools do this. Why should one child get all the opportunities just because they are the best speaker, etc?

I probably should be grateful that one of my DDs was the chosen one but I'd rather she'd had fewer chances and DD1 had had a couple more.

oxygenna · 05/07/2014 15:54

I was always the bloody narrator, or the Angel Gabriel. Nice speaking voice, apparently.

None of us wanted to be Mary, you had to hold Joseph's arm and didn't get to say much

limitedperiodonly · 05/07/2014 15:54

I was Mary. I have brown hair. I'd like to say it was my acting that won me the part but I was the Head's pet Blush.

I wasn't given any lines but I improvised and every time someone came to view Tiny Tears the Baby Jesus I stretched out my arm in a regal beckoning gesture and said: 'I bid you enter'.

I'm beginning to realise why so many of my classmates hated me.

oxygenna · 05/07/2014 15:56

Good point, whyami. It's July, beginning of. And I've been drawn into a Christmas thread without realising.

Tuts

limitedperiodonly · 05/07/2014 15:59

There's no closed season on bearing a grudge.

I'd have liked to have been the narrator btw but that was the Head's job. On balance, that was a wise choice. I was hated enough already.