to sing harmonies in toddler music sessions?

[PrincessPotsie]

Am I turning into one of those annoying mums? I always remember a v annoying dad doing sit ups during 'Row Row Row Your Boat' at a playgroup I once went to. He definitely was BU...

Well said numanoid

Numanoid - For the love of God! It is toddler group song time!

Harmony elsewhere, including the examples you yourself have listed, I haven't noticed anybody complain about.

numanoid I completely agree.

oxygena, so if you're happy with harmonising on those contexts, why not at a toddler group? What is the difference, really?

Are you really asking me the difference between a toddler group song time and music played on the radio?

I think I hope, and with the other examples, the difference is bleddy obvious.

I cannot believe this thread is still chuntering along

oxygenna, yes I'm asking you what the difference is.

Why, in one context are you happy to hear someone harmonise and in the other you are not?

It may be "bleddy obvious" to you but it is not to me. Why would you enjoy listening to harmonies if you heard them through the radio but not in real life? I am genuinely curious.

In that case I believe you're just being disingenuous...

I think it's fairly 'bleddy obvious' to most people Wigglylines that if you harmonise in a toddler group song time you're going to look and sound like a complete plank.

I'm not, honestly.

Why do you think some people think it's nice to hear harmonies on the radio but not in real life?

I'm asking as I am genuinely curious what your answer will be.

Personally I can't think of an answer that makes any real sense, can you?

pigsDOfly that doesn't answer my question.

Th question is why would you enjoy listening to harmonies on the radio but not in real life? (Assuming sung well!)

Nothing wrong with harmonies in real life. Used to sing harmonies when singing with my daughters when they were children, but that was us at home on our own.

In a toddler group with lots of other people and very small children who are probably just about beginning to grasp the idea of a tune it smacks of pretension and 'loud parenting'.

Again, not quite answering my question, but getting nearer. I'm not asking when you would yourself sing harmonies, I was asking when you would enjoy listening to someone else sing harmonies.

If you enjoy it on the radio, why not at toddler group?

What if happened to be at your toddler group and started harmonising, would you enjoy listening to them then? Or do you prefer to have a barrier (like a radio) between you and them to be able to listen to them without feeling embarrassed for/by them?

Thought of you yesterday singsongslummy (great name btw) when I was singing (some harmonies) at playgroup and looked around wondering if any other parents were musicians or singers.

Some really good points NumanoidNancy.

I just don't get, and I am really not being disingenuous, I just don't get why people think it's showing off or loud parenting. It's just a bit of harmonising, and it's not going to distract from children learning or having fun. I honestly don't get why it's not appropriate, it's not like it's not age appropriate.
I am honestly not being disingenuous or goady, I am genuinely interested.

Arya why are you so sure it won't distract? I've seen it before and usually it puts some of the other mums off singing because all of a sudden they're looking at each other like "wha? Are we supposed to be doing that, too?"

Usually by the end of the song the one doing the harmony and maybe one other mum are still singing, the kids are looking at their parents like "why did you stop singing?" and the whole thing unravels.

...and in my experience, the lady doing the harmonising was totally oblivious or didn't care that it stopped others from singing. I appreciate that could just be that individual, though.

Oh, well we have completely different experiences then. The parents at the group I worked at (and also the groups I went to as a parent) weren't distracted by it and just carried on singing, if anything it added something to the session. I am talking about a little bit of subtle harmonising at key points here, not taking over and belting out notes over everyone else. I can see it would be distracting if someone completely took over.

Yes, sorry, my view is probably biased based on my experience of the mum taking over...loudly. In several sessions, too.

Wiggly I think you've actually answered your own question by putting "Assuming it's sung well" - 9 times out of 10 it won't be. The other 1 time it would depend on how loud it was sung - if it overpowered the main melody then it would confuse and make it hard for some children to know what they're supposed to be joining in with.

Different context but relevant: I used to sing in a church choir and one of the other women who was supposed to sing alto actually couldn't because she kept getting distracted by the soprano part and shifting up into that instead. She couldn't read music so couldn't work out what notes she was supposed to sing, when it was countered with a louder part (which, let's face it, sopranos usually are). Toddlers can't read music either, obviously, and are relying on listening to the people around them to work out what to sing - they're going to have troubles if there is one loud voice singing something different.

As to why people don't like listening to harmonies in RL, well I refer you back to your own point. 9 times out of 10 it's not done well, unless in a choir/choral setting.

It feels very showy offy and a bit 'me me me' instead of about the kids singing and having fun.

I would feel the same if a parent pulled out a guitar or tambourine.

Different when done in a professional context like if you are the leader of the music group or on the radio having released an album.

IMO it's an indication of people's own insecurities/embarrassment if they take offence to someone behaving differently.

Baaaaaaa!

Live and let harmonise

Some people are getting really irate at people not agreeing with them that harmonising at a toddler group is a great idea. We've had:

I'm more of the opinion of why the fuck WOULDN'T you want some harmonies added!

Because it sounds nice and is a bit of fun. Why on earth not? How fucking joyless.

Music would be pretty fucking dull if that all started getting frowned upon too. (When no one has actually frowned at other harmonising at all.)

I'm imagining these people angrily harmonising "Wind the fucking bobbin up" at toddler groups.

Wow I run a toddler group and noone's ever tried this one (yet). If any mn come along I dare you to have a go next week....

I'm amazed anyone thinks this is ok/ socially acceptable/ normal...

Oh how I used to cringe when my mum belted out 'oh cooooooome' in O Come All Ye Faithful at Christmas services. I'd forgotten that.

It doesn't matter whether harmonies are nice to hear or sing or whatever - what you wanted to know, OP, was whether you were turning into 'one of those annoying mums', and unfortunately this thread demonstrates that it's more than likely that when you do this at toddlers, people will mainly think you're a twat. I really wouldn't.