to think it's rude to begin a sentence with the word "Actually"

[weneedtotalkaboutmusic]

and even more so if that sentence is any kind of advice or lecture or correction on the subject of manners.

I first read this in an Enid Blyton book (Malory Towers?) as a child. It seemed right then and it seems right now.

I agree, it sounds so condescending.

YANBU

It's rude.

I don't agree. I think it's fine in the right circumstances.

who will be the first to use the word in their post?

You think that's bad?

My husband starts his sentences with "Listen..."

Makes my blood boil.

I have become very sarcastic in my replies

what are the right circumstances though Bowlersarm?

Actually, I think you're talking crap.

"Now don't take this the wrong way, but..."

Actually is a great word.

Nowt wrong with that sentence

Actually, when I come to think of it, I have seen a penis beaker before...

The actually wasn't offensive there!

Ok in the right circumstances I'd say - it doesn't have to be condescending.

Actually, I think you'l' find you are wrong' = rude.

Actually, no don't do it that way, I've made a mistake' = fine.

'Listen.....' is rude, I know a certain person who says that, he also starts sentences with 'can I just say.....' and you know it's going to be something unbelievably arrogant and/or pompous.

Actually I will have a glass of wine since you are having one.

I frequently use 'actually' when discussing ideas for lessons with colleagues , meaning 'oh I've remembered/thought we could...'

Do you want to meet at the pub at 6pm?
Actually, I've got to call in on my elderly mum first, can we make it half past?

Is that rude?

Actually, I've changed my mind

Acksherly ossifer, I ham not zhrunk and dishorderley.

My husband starts his sentences with "Listen..."

he isnt Tony Bliar is he?

Actually, it has never occured to me to be offnsive

My friend does Actually followed by my name.

IT MAKES ME SO ANGRY.

and breathe.

slithy

Actually I am not sure Enid Blyton should be taken as an expert.

OP, language is fluid. Go with it.

'Actually, thinking about it, I'm not sure I agree with you....'

What's wrong with that?

"i hear what your saying BUT" followed by a comment completely disregarding what the person has said.

I tend to use actually when I've changed my mind.

"No offence but...." and then go onto offend

My godmother starts most of her sentences with "actually" which is really annoying but it's just a habit she has, rarely does it actually (!) mean anything!

Actually, "go with it" is quite annoying too.

All the ok Actuallys are about the speaker changing his/her mind as in Actually I have seen a penis beaker before.

All the not-ok Actuallys are about contradicting the other person.

Hooray, I have a new rule. Lashings of ginger beer.

'Actually I have three kids too' - when random man in shop said to me (while on my own with with baby dd) 'haha, enjoy having only the one while it lasts!' What is rude about that?