I know I'm being unreasonable but I need help please!

[Snowwhite22]

I am 32 and I've had spots since I was 13. Some times it's better than others but at the moment I'm going through a really bad flare up.

We took the dc to their school fete this morning and we all got soaked. We went into the toilets to sort our selves out and I made the mistake of looking in the mirror. My skin looked awful and so did all the make up I've put on to try to hide the spots. My dh said to go home and get changed and then go back to the fete again(it's only a 10minute walk). Once we got home, I said I didn't want to go back and that anyone could stay with me if they also didn't want to go. Everyone wanted to go so I've just waved them off and quickly gone into the bathroom to wash my face and put my spot cream on.

I really wanted to be with my family but I just can't go back talking to all the other parents when I'm so embarrassed about my skin.
I double cleanse twice a day and put Duac cream on that I get from the doctors. I'm always asking for a referral to see a skin specialist but I'm told the spots are not bad enough.
I only drink water and don't eat chocolate. What else can I do? Can any one give me some ideas? I know it's wrong to hide away so please don't be hard on me, just really need help.

Cetaphil is great and very often recommended by dermatologists -- it's soap free and very gentle. I'd suggest trying that for a few weeks and see if there's any improvement. Don't over-cleanse or dry out your skin too much and do use moisturiser.

But mostly I would strongly recommend seeing a dermatologist, even if privately. You can drive yourself crazy trying out all sorts of products but a good dermatologist can help figure out the root of the problem, which makes a big difference in treatment.

There is hope, you just need some professional advice.

Your DH sounds very supportive

Oh sorry, just read the first page

Sorry the LRP didn't work out but please don't go back to using Simple, it will definitely make things worse. Stick with the Cetaphil at least until you see a doctor.

So pleased this has helped you Felix, please let me know how you get on. Your right I've spent way too much money recently :( It's strange but they haven't got any worse today. I double cleansed with the simple wash last night and put my Duac on, then dotted sudo on the spots. They seem a bit calmer today.
So I've put off booking derm app for today, will see what they look like tomorrow...

Roaccutane was the only thing that worked for me, went on it at 27 after 10 years of acne and now at 32 you'd never know I'd had acne, I don't even wear foundation anymore as I'm so happy with my skin. Yes the side effects are unpleasant (I still suffer from dry eyes now) but if it's affecting your life to this degree then I'd argue its worth a try

In the meantime, consult Caroline Hirons' website as advised and yy to Estée Lauder Double Wear foundation, applied with a good brush. Keep your skin clean but don't get into the mentality of 'punishing' it. Don't over exfoliate and do moisturise. Dermalogica acne products helped to calm mine down and stop the soreness but didn't stop the spots iyswim

Keep your chin up, I know how awful it is to have your life ruled by acne but there are ways out of your current situation. A private dermatologist will prescribe Roaccutane I'm sure

OP, I really feel for you. It's is absolutely horrible to feel this way. I always had lovely skin until after ds was born and then, over the course of a couple of years, the acne got worse and worse until it stopped me leaving the house. My face was covered; I felt disfigured.

My GP started me on lymecycline. Didn't work. Changed my pill. Didn't work. More lymecycline. Didn't work. Lush products, LRP, Simple (utter shit as you now know!), Liz Earle, tea tree oil, antibiotic cream, cleansers, toners, exfoliators. I even spent a fortune on some vile Chinese medicine stuff that turned my skin orange and didn't do a thing for the spots. Diet, no alcohol, exercise, everything. Spent hundreds and hundreds of pounds on stuff that made absolutely no bloody difference at all. I was caked in makeup from dawn to dusk and I was completely paranoid about the way I looked.

I was just about to go back to the GP to beg him for a roaccutane prescription (despite my brother having suffered severe depression whilst on it) but was googling and found acne.org. Honestly it changed my life, no exaggeration! They recommend benzoyl peroxide which seems drastic at first but I used it religiously and within a few weeks my skin was completely clear. The thing that's really important though is the advice about how to handle your skin. No over-cleansing, no exfoliation AT ALL.

I used the cetaphil cleanser and moisturiser along with the benzoyl peroxide for about a year. That was about 4 years ago. I now oil cleanse with jojoba or coconut oil and bung on some benzoyl peroxide around totm. Nothing else (a bit of Astral in winter, maybe).

I get the odd whitehead by my nose at totm and that's it. I'm now 41 and my skin is genuinely lovely

Oil cleansing sounds mad but if you do it with the right oil (jojoba!) it's the best thing you will ever do for your skin. Cetaphil is good to rebalance but after a while you won't even need that. I know I sound a bit mad and evangelical but that's because it really did work when I thought I was stuck with painful, ugly spots forever.

If nothing else, have a look at the acne.org site - they are selling their own branded stuff but you don't have to buy it, everything they recommend is also available in boots tbh. The advice is amazing though. Best of luck.

Honestly please lose the simple wash - it's terrible stuff. It won't help at all.

I might give the oil cleansing a go in school holidays when I don't have to see too many people! I know people are saying the simple wash is terrible but it's the only thing I have got to wash with other than the LRP. Which only made them worse.
I've spent so much money recently that I need to use what I have at the moment and see how it goes. I'm still hoping the zinc tablets will help and I've started taking a vit c and iron tablet too. With the diet changes, I'm really weary of it because I'm a tiny size 6. I've cut so much sugar and rubbish out of my diet that I can't afford to lose anymore weight.
A really big thank you though to every one who is trying to help, I really do appreciate it.

OP not read through whole thread but the only thing that worked for me (i have had this situation twice in my aduolt life, once in the run-up tp my wedding and it was bloody miserable not getting treatment in time and having spots in all my photos)was Roaccutane. It gets a lot of bad press as is linked to depression which I can't comment on as not medical. But it worked for me when NOTHING else did. So sorry you're having a crap time, I understand so well how miserable it can be x

Can't believe you didn't get help in time for your wedding :( , that must have been a difficult time. I have only got positive comments on here about Roaccutane, I'm sure I will have to go on it at some point. It's great to hear it's helped so many people.

I'd recommend dropping all dairy out of your diet for a couple of weeks, and see if that helps. I was amazed at what dropping dairy did to my skin, it never looked better! This will not cost you anything, and you'll see quickly if it makes any difference. Good luck!

Your GP cannot deny you a referral, so go back and insist if you can face taking the place on.

Duac and everything else the GP offered failed with my DD and he was awful about giving her a referral when she tried to sort it without having me there. However, thanks to private help, she went over to the stronger quinoderm and she is almost clear now. (active bit is benzoyl peroxide, OTC in Boots.) Depends on what the problem is, obviously.

Also, try not eating chicken/chicken products if it's hormonal....worked for me.

I don't think it is always hormonal tbh.
My dh has several skin problems including acne and tissue scarring.
He tried Roaccutane and it really was more trouble than it was worth and only slightly improved his condition.
After seeing several dermatologists all that seems open to him is laser treatment.
it used to be that if it affected your life, depressed you etc treatment was available on the NHS but no more alas, so we are saving.
Tea tree oil with a barrier like almond oil helps to dry it, but if you don't get it right you end up too dry.

How are you getting on OP?

Just wanted to update my thread and say a massive thank you to everyone who has helped me. Nearly everything I'm using for my skin now is because someone on here recommended it.
I am so pleased to say my skin is almost completely clear! I really wanted to try the LRP products again as they are quite expensive and once I got through the first few days I saw I really big improvement. I use cetaphil to stop my skin from drying out. I really recommend this moistuiser as it is the only cream that hasn't caused more spots for me.
I also take a maximum strength zinc tablet daily from Holland and Barrett, this has without doubt been the best thing I could ever have done to improve my skin. I also take an iron and vit C tablet.
I'm still using the Duac from the doctor, drinking only water-no fruit juice at all and I have cut out a lot of chocolate and junk food.
A combination of all this seems to be working at the moment and I have got my confidence back after feeling so so low. I really do appreciate everyones help, and I hope maybe other people may find this helpful. I really understand how awful bad skin can be.

I am so happy for you!! Great news! I hope things continue to improve! X

Thank you so much! Really hope it stays this way for a while!

YANBU to be upset. I am 31, have tried loads of stuff and still cry about my skin regularly.

Double cleaning may not be helping, I found out recently that my skin is actually incredibly dry and too much cleansing sets it off.

Brilliant stuff.

Bad skin is so miserable. :(

I came on to say that it was/is getting out and getting sun on my face that works for me. I had awful spots, was on antibiotics for years. Then I got an outdoor job, and they pretty much cleared up that first summer.

I get spotty in winter still, but try to get outside on sunny days and even in January a bit of sunshine massively helps.

Oh oh.... Forgot to add that the other BIG thing for me was stopping ALL products. I use only water and have done for years.

Every time I think oh, I'll treat myself to a nice facial wash or something surely I've grown out of all that by now, nope. Spots within days.

I am double cleansing with the LRP as one clean just isn't enough but then I am putting cetaphil on after to stop my skin from drying out. It really is helping so much.
I understand crying about spots, I've totally been there. Could you use any of the things I've mentioned? They really have transformed my skin.

It's funny how different things help different people Doc. I found when we went on holiday a few weeks ago, the sun really dried my skin and I came with more spots!