To not know how to deal with this (name issue)

[mytwoblackandwhitecats]

I have a first name that is similar to another better known name, a little like Hannah/Anna. Mine isn't as common as those examples though.

All my life I've been plagued by being addressed as the wrong name! People see it and assume it is its slightly more common variant.

At any rate - how do you deal with people constantly getting your name wrong? I ignore it if I am unlikely to see the person again - in hospital waiting rooms for example, but it does grate as it isn't my name!

Then when you do correct people they keep getting it wrong. I keep just saying 'correct name' with a smile but it does annoy people; I'm sure some of them think I'm actually called the more common name!

My name LOOKS very similar to the other one written down but are pronounced very differently.

How do you deal with it??

My first name is ludicrously common popular and is spelled the conventional way. However, we have a big boss whose name is the same but misses off the last letter. As a result my colleagues now spell my name wrong: the boss spells it one way therefore she's correct...

My maiden name was Germanic and noone could spell or pronounce it. I learned to live with the pronunciation thing but I did find it slightly irritating when people informed me I was spelling my own name wrong. They spelled it how they wanted to. I even got into trouble at school for getting my name 'wrong'

My family and friends still put a k on the end of DP's name instead of a c, no matter how many times I tell them ITS A C!

Saying that he did once spell his own name wrong whilst distracted :D

OP, are you Tamsin? I spent 4 years calling my friend's cat Tasmin when her name was Tamsin! And I LOVE the name Tamsin so not sure why my mouth always defaulted to Tasmin.

I was once called Breadbin. Since then if they get in the general region of the correct spelling or pronunciation of my name then I go with it.
I'm wondering if I am the other to strawberry's

Actually growing up with a boys name as a surname that I frequently ggot called (teachers why change the column when reading the register?) just knowing someone is talking to me not a boy child is useful.

I have a similar problem in that my surname is quite a common one, but has an unusual spelling.

It doesn't bother me when people spell it wrong, except for when it actually matters eg. on official forms, and because it is part of my work email address. Then I have to spend ages spelling it out and people still get it wrong.

I hate this. I have a very common full first name, but I am always called the boys version. People see it written down, look up at me, then call me a boys name. They address letters, emails, everything, to a man.

On top of that, I am always called a shortened version, but a Scottish shortening, not the usual English one. So people will reply to an email (say), with a name that has appeared nowhere. Or assume I go by the usual English version and call me that without even asking, having never asked me what I'm called. And because the version I use is quite unusual down here, I get called the wrong version of that all the time. Any 'normal' s name but my own! And the shortening I use is a unisex name, so that doesn't help with the confusion over my full name.

Add tonrhat a very Scottish surname that no one can say, or spell. Argh.

So yea, yanbu. I hate it. I. me a real effort with people's names, hownto say, spell, exactly what they like to be called etc. It's not hard. It gets so tiring when people just don't care about calling you your name, and will not even try.

I have a name that, when written, looks (at a not very careful glance ;)) like a more common name and when spoken (eg on the phone) sounds like a different more common name. Again, my actual name is 2 syllables, pronounced phonetically, not difficult.
Don't really mind though, even though I'm not keen on either of the names (and not the world's most easygoing person).

I have the exact same situation as you OP but have over the years just accepted it is one of those things, nobody is intentionally trying to say it wrong to annoy me or whatever! It just comes more naturally for people to pronounce it the other way because my version is extremely unusual thanks mum and dad The only tricky bit for me is when people finally click and understand how wrong they have been saying it, and the embarrassment it causes them :( and the clear avoidance of saying the name at all just in case from that point on

There is a lovely girl at my gym who constantly calls me Rebecca, which is not my name. The first time she did it, she was introducing me to someone and I didn't want to embarrass her but now I can't tell her as it's been weeks and she'll be mortified.

I think its very rude my sil name is Carolyn even people who have known her for years call her Caroline because they can't be arsed saying her name properly I mean it not even that uncommon ,I have a double barrelled first name and for my whole life I have had to correct people using just the first of my two names.

I have one of those -e /-a names but have the more common -e version. (It must have been very common when I was born as 6 out of 15 girls in my class at secondary school had the same name).

Although I didn't generally get called the wrong name I had an Aunt (slightly batty but that is a whole different story) who thought the -a version sounded more posh so she always insisted on using that! Drove both me and my Mum mad when she put it on cards. She was very much the type who always thought she was in the right no matter what evidence there was to the contrary so she probably did believe that she knew better than me and my parents what they had actually called me!

Argh I'm totally with you on this, the commoner similar name to mine ends in an E whereas my (totally different name!) ends in an A. I have taken to responding to people with a blank look and 'A'.

Eg, Fool 'Hey Louise!'
Me 'A'
Fool 'huh'
me 'LouisA'
Fool 'um yeah, Louisa, same thing, whatever, no need to be touchy'

Aaaarrrgggh it's the same as me calling you Geoff when your name is Lesley! Two different names, I'm not being arsey by wishing to be called by the one my parents gave me, whether you like it or not!!

(My name isn't Louisa btw!)

So - I have the great fortune to have a surname that is often mis-spelt or mis-pronounced as Freak! Even my letter telling my I had passed my probationary year as a teacher with distinction was addressed to Ms Freak. Currently getting it with the automated hospital phone reminers about forthcoming appointments!

Why do you think it is very rude?

The problem is- you rarely get to meet someone and see their name written down and then pronounced correctly numerous times before you have to use it. I have a new colleague with a variant of a common name and I've had to have a couple of gos at getting it right in emails (I've typed it and then checked and got it wrong, so retyped it), plus often people use diminutives so you then have made the effort to learn it and have to learn something else.

The fact that it happens all the time to so many people must give you a clue they are not all deliberately disrespecting you, they just can't quite remember your exact title, first name, second name, any diminutives -all of which people get amazingly huffy about on here. Given there's so many variations now (Miss, Ms, Dr, Rev), different spellings of common names and so on- surely this is inevitable.

I chose a name that is quite hard to pronounce for one of my children, cos I loved it, but I don't get huffy about if they pronounce it differently and neither does she, especially as most people are unsure and trying to do the right thing, not actively disrespecting you or being rude.

I have a very common English name but with a letter missing off the usual way of spelling it, though it's pronounced the same. Sometimes I correct people depending on what they need my name for. But I don't get annoyed that they can't spell it as people can't know how it's spelt. But it would drive me mad to constantly have to correct the pronounciation of my first name, like I did with my maiden name which was totally unpronouncable and unspellable, thank goodness dh has a more common name!

Then - you make the effoerr to get it right though. So many people don't. And so often, the correct version is in front of them, so it just screams of 'I haven't properly paid attention to you and don't care enough to get it right'. Being called the wrong name every single time is just infuriating.

This is like the thread I started I'm a Deborah but people think it saves tons of time by saying Debbie gives me the rage.

Now that's annoying too sonlypuppyfat people that think they can. shorten your name if you introduced yourself to me as Debbie I would call you Debbie but if you introduced yourself to me as/Deborah to call you Debbie is just rude!

Ds and dd1 have this issue with their surname. It's Thomson (their great grandad is Scottish) but as we live in England almost everybody spells it Thompson. I have lost count of the letters and forms we've received from school, doctors, dentist etc with the wrong spelling on it. Dd1 was also told she had spelt her surname wrong at school once and the teacher added the "p"!

I correct it on everything that needs to be sent back (also went in and had a word with dd's teacher although she still spelt it wrong for the rest of the year) and I always spell it out when on the phone but it makes no difference. I think they've got a lifetime of correcting people head of them, poor things...

My daughter gets this, people add a "y" to her name, to make it a more common name. She gets so fed up :(

Now I'm wondering if you are Joanne or Joanna (I.e which is wrong) as they ar about same popularity ime

Wheee I live everyone calls dd the Louise version of her name, whereas she is the Louisa version iykwim. Even if I've just said it!

Although one letter different they are a v different type of name to me.

Mine is honestly a nightmare.

'Hannah, could you pass me that?'
'Sure, it's Anna though!' (friendly smile)
'ooh ... Annie, that's unusual!'
'It is, yes, but it's Anna.'
'Ann-ah' (each syllable pronounced deliberately) right!'

Then two minutes later:

'Hannah, have you got ...?'

It drives me absolutely demented! (Unfortunately it isn't Hannah or Anna!)

DP is called Noah. On every takeaway coffee or order its always incorrect. Normally Nower. So strange as its a well known and easy to spell name. He works in a professional field and a client the other day started making ark jokes. Can you believe that people act like 5 year olds at the age of 40?!