To move my ds out of his current school?

[Dontmakemecometovegas]

Stick with me, I may go on a bit!

Ds is currently in reception, he's just 5 so one of the younger ones.
In his class there are 23 children, quite a few have SEN and several have behaviour problems. He has struggled to make friends, there are only a few girls and they want to play together and the boys play too rough for ds. He now has one close friend and about five other friends who are mainly girls.

Across reception there are 45 children so not enough for two classes when they go up to ks1. What the school do is is have one year one class, a mixed 1/2 class and a year 2 class with 30 in each.

Apparently this year they are looking at the children's emotional maturity and putting the emotionally mature year 1s in with the less mature year 2s.
Ds has been put in the year 1 class with his closest friend but the other children he likes (and who he is in the same reading / writing / maths groups with) have gone into the year 1/2 mix.

I am concerned that he will be held back because consequently at least half his class this september will have behaviour problems and / or SEN. Although I'm not really concerned about the SEN more that 15 or so children will have behaviour problems and be disruptive. The better behaved more able children are in the 1/2 mix. I suspect ds is probably slightly above average in ability but his behaviour is excellent. He is easily capable of sitting and listening and following instructions and is apparently very self motivated.

He has found the behaviour of a lot of his classmates this year difficult and next year it looks like it will be worse because the calmer children will have gone and there will also be children from the other class who have behaviour problems.
I'm also concerned that the gap between those in the 1/2 class and those in the year 1 class will get wider. I appreciate the less mature year 2s will be in there but they will still be further on than the less mature year 1s.

The following year ds will hopefully then go into the main year 2 class but the year after that when he is year 3 he will presumably be in the year 3 class whilst again the brighter ones go into a 3/4 mix.

I don't know what to do. There is a specific reason that ds's closest friend can't go into the year 1/2 class which I don't want to share on here and part of me wonders if they've just kept them together. They are quite reliant on each other. Otoh maybe ds isn't as able and mature as I think he is and I'm just being biased because I'm his mother. I cannot understand though why the children he is grouped with have gone into the mixed class and he hasn't.

Because this pattern will continue throughout the school and the school is poor in general (only 50% meet the end of ks2 targets, they are in the bottom for everything) I'm considering moving him. Or should I just see how it goes? I feel so torn. The class is very boy heavy too as there are only 11 girls out of 45 and 6 of them are emotionally mature so are in the 1/2 mix leaving only 5 in a class of 3. I'm not wild about this either.

I just read your other post.... If it is in special measures it is likely the staff are working incredibly hard to get out of special measures and the monitoring the school will have is well beyond a school that is good or outstanding so it will get better?

My DD did not want to move schools but now (end of yr 1) she loves her school and actually tells me how much better it is. I could see the changes after a week. She came home telling me all about her day - she never did this before. Also we moved her after Easter and not at end of school year. She was upset about leaving some friends, but incidentally they have all changed schools too. You have to put it into a long term picture. It sounds like, long term, the teaching and learning isn't good if 50% achieve L4+. I know that can change but it can take time. Good luck.

Thanks.

I'm going to see the other school on Friday although I've looked round it before. Just want to speak to someone about it all really. Hoping nobody else beat me to the school place before then.

It doesn't sound like you like the school and it doesn't sound as though your DS has settled well at all. If your DS was going into the mixed Y1/Y2 class would you be happy to leave him there? If so it might be worth talking to the teacher and the head about things.

I think you're doing the right thing to look at the further away school but it is an awfully long way for you to go (16 miles per day for you) so you shouldn't move him without giving it careful thought. Do you have other DCs? Would they be guaranteed to get into the further away school if you go there for DS? Also how would you manage one child having a club after school and one child not?

We only have one child.

I might feel better if he was in the 1/2 mix but the school must feel that he is not suited to it else they would have put him in there. And as I said maybe he isn't, I don't know if the ones that have been placed there are more able than ds or not. On the surface of it - since he's in their groups - it seems not. But there must have been something which has meant he's been kept in the year 1 class rather than into the mixed group.

The trouble is so many boys together where there are a number of behaviour problems, I think causes more trouble. They kind of feed off each other.

And the pattern will continue throughout the school.

I would speak to your local authority too...isn't it them who arranges in year applications?

The other school said I could do it directly with them.

There is another school, nearer and very very good but obviously I can't get in. I am going to go on the waiting list I think, although probably realistically will never get a place.

Oh god. Why does it have to be so complicated?!

Move move move. I would be out of there like a shot.

In which case it sounds like you have a plan of action. Go to see the school with place. Accept place if you like it more than current school. Ask to go on waiting list for nearer school. Places do come up even in very good schools. Many people decide not to take place from waiting list and disrupt settled child so you may be lucky from the waiting list.

In the meantime accept that you're going to have a long school run. Are there any other families near you who go to the further away school? They may be happy to do a school run share with you so you only have do half the runs.

Yeah I know its nice to give chances and not judge etc etc but MOVE him woman, move move move, take the place while you can.

You said you'd give it a year. Instead of improving the school has now given you new concerns about Year 1. I'm not sure what you said in the OP would be the boy/girl ratio in Year 1, but if it was still only 5 girls I wouldn't like the imbalance.

I would move him.

Four miles isn't far. DS's school is 6 miles away, there are a few out of catchment children just in DS's year who travel 4-6 miles to get there.

The Y1/2 class isn't the good as gold class though is it Merry? as it has the emotionally immature Y2 children doesn't it? Or have I misunderstood?

It will have the less mature year 2s, but is assume they'd still be more mature than the less mature year 1s?

Yes there will be 5 girls, 25 boys in the year one class. And again I guess that pattern will continue through the school. It started out with a huge gender imbalance and three girls have left or are leaving at the end of the year.

I sent one of mine to a school with a similar demographic profile but the teaching was excellent and the resources fantastic, with a great Ofsted. I moved them though after yet another letter asking parents not to fight (yes fight) at the school gates and keep all personal issues off school property. There was just too much trouble at the school gates and in the playground- lots of fights and 'physical play' and if you have a boy who doesn't enjoy that type of environment, it will be very isolating.

As someone else said, I think you have to admit defeat- if there were positives in there, like amazing teaching, it would be worth persisting in the face of a large % of behavioural issues but there isn't! And schools with a lot of children with issues can be great and get good Ofsteds- this is not one of them. I would be up and away. Don't even hesitate. I would call the admissions officer this pm and ask if there is any waiting list for the other school and if they sound like there may be competition for the place, apply now, today, what have you got to lose? If you wait a few more days, you may lose that place (I have moved mine recently and had to move very swiftly indeed as people are starting to shift for the summer/autumn now).

I don't want to make a knee jerk reaction to ds not being in that 1/2 mix, although I am sad that he hasn't been judged emotionally mature or able enough for it, but then I don't want him to be in a year 1 where most of the children are difficult.

There seems to be some children at the top, a few in the middle and then a big big big gap and the rest aren't as able or have behaviour problems or both.

When I saw ds's teacher in February she said he was already meeting the Early learning goals so I'm expecting him to be at least at the expected level when his report arrives in July.

Ha - we have had similar letters.
Police had a presence for several days at home time last month.
Some parents not allowed on school grounds. Had several letters stating verbal and threatening behaviour towards staff won't be tolerated.

Move!

You were right to gamble, as it was in special measures last May there was every chance that it would improve rapidly over the course of this year. Many schools do.

However, this time you've been unlucky, the school hasn't had a radical improvement and you have significant concerns for next year. Your DS can only go to school once, move before it really starts affecting his progress and emotional development.

Yes definitely move! Can you not arrange it earlier than Friday? Him staying at his current school sounds disasterous.

I'm at work tomorrow and they couldn't see me today.
I could ring and accept the place regardless though.

I want to speak to dh about it again this evening. We only found out what was happening yesterday and dh wasn't back from work until late so didn't really have chance.

Dh was dead against sending ds to the school initially and I talked him round. Oh dear. He may say 'I told you so!'

Are you officially on the waiting list for the far away school? If so then they won't just take the place you've been offered away before you visit on Friday. If you just happened to find out a space has come available but you are not on waiting list then it may be more important to act quickly as someone else maybe going through the same thought process.

I would accept the place...Worse case scenario I you can withdraw your acceptance.

Many other parents may well be thinking along the same line as yourself.

There's no waiting list for the school 4 miles away. There's another 2 miles away with a list.

I rang the 4 miles one this morning and they said they had a place. I arranged to go in Friday to discuss it further.
Do you think I should ring up and say I want it, even if for some reason when I talk it through with dh he says no (can't see it happening but don't feel I should make this decision without telling him first)?

What I mean is, if I accept it is that it? A done deal?

My issue would be the behaviour. Why isn't this being tackled by the school.