To get annoyed when parents spell their kids name wrong

[HelloSteve]

...and then they get annoyed when people constantly spell their names "wrong" (aka the right way)? Or buy personalised items with their names spelt their way?

Not really a big deal I know, but I what do you expect when you give your child a name spelled in a way to be yoo-niq?

Over the past couple of weeks I've heard of a Emma-Leigh, a Sophy and a Jordyn. I can't help thinking 'poor kids they're going to have to go through their whole lives having to correct people'. It seems people don't think about that though.

I know a woman who has two grown up daughters called Jemma (I assume they meant for that to be Gemma) and a Hollie (again, I assume Holly) and she always gets annoyed when people don't ask and just assume they're spelt Gemma and Holly, but I don't know why. She should have expected that/be used to that now? I know she would constantly get irritated when the kids were at school and received Christmas cards/party invites with their names spelt wrong but honestly I have little sympathy. What was she expecting when she spelt her kids names wrong?

Your thoughts?

"Willm Shakp
William Shaksper
Wm Shakspe
William Shakspere
Willm Shakspere
William Shakspeare
William Shakespeare

At least people who do creative name spelling are in good company."

This always gets trotted out. There was no such thing as standard spellings when Shakespeare was writing. That only happened about 100 years later, with the 18th century boom in printing and the explosion in literacy that came with it. Like it or not, it is a cultural convention now that words have a standard spelling or only a handful of variations; citing Shakespeare's variable spelling is a specious argument. It's like arguing that because people used to have arranged marriages aged 12 in the Middle Ages we should be free to do that now. OK, that's an extreme example but the point is that conventions change.

I get it with my name, it can be ie or ey.

I've done it with DD's name it could be e, y, ie, ey.

Yes, but Jemma, Hollie and Sophy are all common variants. Jemaagh, Hollee or Soefii would be yooneek spellings which I think would lead to trouble for the child (problems with paperwork etc).

Sorry, that was to Manatee.

"it is a cultural convention now that words have a standard spelling"

words yes, names no.

Good point about standardised spellings, Manatee.

I feel a little sorry when I see names like Pheobe, as I guess (rightly or wrongly) that it wasn't deliberately misspelled by the parents.

Well, legally Shakespeare couldn't vary his name like that, these days. So, it's not quite true that names have not been standardised.

"words yes, names no."

But would you say names are perhaps slightly more standardised than they were. Thinking back to old documents and lists, and the phonetic spellings and variations for just one name, even from regions, were sometimes staggering.

merrymouse There are generally more variants of name spellings than words in general, yes. But there are still conventional (within a given culture) and less conventional spellings. All name spellings are not equal. Jason and Jay-Sun will create different first impressions. If I name my baby Piotr pronounced Peter even though he has English parents three generations back on both sides people will be a bit .

Like it or not name spelling conventions do exist. And some parents deliberately choose less conventional spellings or even completely bizarre ones because they want to signal something, oh, I don't know, what free spirits they are or how unique and special their child is or whatever. This thread is a debate about that phenomenon and whether or not it really has the intended effect or just creates problems for the child.

Name changed to avoid outing myself :)

I get annoyed when anyone gets annoyed about spelling names.
My name is
Lindsay
Lindsey
Lyndsey
Lyndsay
Lynsey
Lynsay
Linsey
Linsay
Linzi

Whatever!!! Who cares? Nobody except my parents and husband are expected to remember.

The only one I know with an odd name is an Ewan. I had no idea how to say it. The mum is apoplectic with people saying E-wan. But it just doesn't look like it should say anything else!

elsie what's wrong with phoebe? Why is it something to be sorry for?

Dd's name is spelt differently because if I had spelt it the original way the sound to the end of it isnt pleasant IMO. It's spelt the Spanish way I believe. I couldn't care less about people such as the OP getting annoyed.

I think it was "Pheobe", not "Phoebe"!

"elsie what's wrong with phoebe? Why is it something to be sorry for?"

Ah, I said Pheobe, not Phoebe.

see Minnie I would recognise Ewan and pronounce it You-wan (i.e. correctly )

x posted with chachah

Who cares, my name wasn't popular or correctly spelled when I was young and I didn't care. I liked when my grandmother shouted on me - half the playground didn't come running like, Lorraine and Catherine and Claire etc, I remember in one class we had 4 Nicola's and 5 Marks

Ewan is the same as Euan and really popular?!? I can't imagine anybody not knowing how to say it!

Can I hijack slightly please?

I have an Isobel who's name we shorten. Can anyone tell me why everyone writes it as Issy and not Izzy? It's pronounced with the hard zzz sound but to my mind ss is soft - or have I got it completely wrong?

I've only seen it written as 'Izzie' or 'Izzy' personally

Sometimes it really is wrong.

I met a little girl called Ruby.

But the parents have spelled it Rubby.

Rubby is not pronounced as Ruby. It is rub-bee. Not roo-bee.
If you heard the name Ruby, there's no way you'd spell it Rubby.

It's not an alternative, it's just wrong, and illiterate.

The parents get really annoyed if people spell it 'wrong' having heard the name Ruby. And when people see the name written and call the child 'rub-bee'. FFS. Poor kid.

Yes, people do have preconceptions based on names.

However, the OP was incorrectly complaining that Jemma was a misspelling of Gemma.

The point I am trying to make is that while some of the examples on this thread do seem a bit ridiculous (haven't come across them in real life...), some attitudes about name spellings are just snobbery or ignorance.

Regardless of 'made up' names once somebody has told you how to spell their name, if you use a different spelling it just gives the impression that you can't be bothered.

A Posh people can be Jekka, Decca, Bunty or Binkie and they can spell their name Cholmondeley while pronouncing it Chumley, but woe betide anybody who dares to be called Taylaa.

I decided to make everyone's life easier by losing the silent 'o' from my Phebe, which is also a less common, but previously used variant.

The important thing is that neither she, nor I, get fussed if the o gets randomly thrown back in.

Thank you - there are 2 others in her class and both are written with the ss - they have even tried to correct her name when she has written it! Every year I have to meet with the teacher and say actually we spell it with zz. Was beginning to doubt my own sanity may still be told I am completely wrong and am one of those parents

Sorry, "A posh person…"