to think we should be allowed to have different opinions on threads without being insulted?

[gorionine]

I hesitated between an AIBU and a "Flouncers'corner" I decided to go to AIBU because it is not personal , not something that was directed at me in particular but sadly something I see more and more on threads.

I could have chosen "flouncers corner" because I am not going to post again (I shall carry on lurking)

I also suspect some posters just carry grudges around from thread to thread, and some unfortunate OP who doesn't even remember having offended this individual finds themselves being attacked on some trumped up or spurious pretext.

Well that's a bit of a shitty suspicion Vintage

Oh dear, time to namechange again .

YANBU. I've noticed it a fair bit in Relationships probably because I sometimes see things differently from the majority and am then on the receiving end of condescending comments and eye-rolls, especially by one high profile poster. Only they can be right; any other view is seen as ridiculous and unhelpful to the OP.

I posted something about 4 years ago, my first post and I'd just had my first baby. I was massively struggling with a lot of things at the time and hadf pnd. Fair enough that readers wouldn't have known this.
My post was about finding another mums reaction to something difficult to deal with. I got flamed beyond flaming. People were calling me a bad mum, saying I was spoiling my child, saying my child was naughty and I was encouraging it, one person even said my child was abusive. Lots of comments like "you're one of THOSE mums aren't you". The baby was 6 months at the time!!! Not enough time had passed for me to be ANY kind of mum!, As I said, people wouldn't have known that I was struggling but it was my first baby and I asked for advice. In no way did I expect or could have foreseen the nastiness that ensued. I worried about it for months and months and it put me off seeing other mums. Not because of the mum that I had posted about, but because I was fearful that I would be judged by any that I met as they would all be like mums the ones I had encountered on MN.

That's awful Littlemoocow. Unfortunately there seems to be a certain type of poster who just hovers until she scents blood and then swoops in to back up some arse of a poster who's got hold of the wrong end of the stick. Sometimes there's three or four of them and the more you try to swat them away the more they come back buzzing angrily around you.
It's a horrible feeling and I've no idea why people do it. I'm not talking about threads where the OP is obviously stirring it or stating a very offensive point of view, but perfectly normal sane threads which just kick off because of these people and cause huge upset to the OP.

There are also, dare I say it, quite a lot of posters whose reading comprehension skills are very poor. They jump in, muddle everyone up, get very cross at being told to read the thread, pick fights based on misunderstandings of other posters and bingo, thread runed.

So true Denzel. There was a thread recently about people having to scrutinise their opening posts as carefully as if they were writing a legal document to ensure there are no ambiguities, phrases that could be misinterpreted, or words that could be jumped on to accuse the OP of being a racist/ageist/disablist or whatever. And still someone will completely miss the point, criticise the OP for something they never said, and become all sneery and sarcastic when the OP tries to correct them.
It's infuriating but there are some posters who just make their argument and insist on running with it even when it's been pointed out that, ahem you've totally missed the point of the OP.

That would be ruined, not runed. Although some thread runing might help solve this problem. Anyone got a 'Turn Letters Into Runes' app?

Just to say - I love this thread. People with reasonable views. Unfortunately I stumbled into the no go zone of AIBU (had to look up what that meant) by mistake. It was not pleasant. I'm here because I had to prove to myself that mumsnet was not the same everywhere.
Nice to meet you all.

And my friend Mrs T is on here too high five

Well this thread proves that there are nice people on mumsnet.

Oh, hello cakemakerg.

The trick is, when it all kicks off, to run away to another thread pronto. Sleb Twaddle is a good hiding place, I find. Some people cannot be reasoned with.

I agree. Sometimes I stay on a thread desperate not to allow a poster get away with twisting and distorting something I've said and work myself up to a state of complete exasperation. Then I suddenly think "why am I even engaging with this numpty" and walk away. So what if they think they've won the argument? It's not worth getting my blood pressure up over.
But I wish I could be better at doing this the minute I realise someone is just going to continue with their arsey rude behaviour. I'm improving, but still need to know when to 'step away from the thread'.

Yes it is annoying if you go against the mainstream and you get called mad or a troll. Fair enough on a contentious subject but on something mundane it's a bit mad.

That's a tough one kim, because generally if you bring it up, most other posters will not have spotted the pattern and you'll get lots of people jumping in to say it isn't all about you and you're being self-absorbed, get over yourself etc. Which your grudge-holder will enjoy enormously.

I agree with you, Vintage. Someone less lazy than me needs to find and post that 'Someone is wrong on the Internet' cartoon.

That said, if anyone starts a 'How often do you change your sheets' thread again within the next 2 years I'm going to have to troll it to fuck. How many times can we have that not very interesting topic, really?

I've spotted it Denz

I wouldnt think so Kim
The personal attacks to the OP are still on the thread I looked at. Not sure that anyone has the time to sort them all out.
TBH Denzil - I started it. I kicked off about them bullying the OP - stupid me didnt realise that it was an old thread. Someone else has resurrected it and the last posting was in March - so I didnt get the ZOMBIE warning.
Clearly the original bullys had left the thread - done their job and departed. But there had been some watchers I think who were of the same mold. Although my comments were aimed at those who bullied the OP and chased her off the thread, I think that they may have recognised themselves in what I was saying.
Anyway - lesson learnt. Stay away from the wrong side of the tracks. But I do feel better for getting it off my chest and standing up to them.

Well I have to disagree here. I like housework threads. It sometimes even shames me into doing some.

People do seem to get upset and angry over the most trivial things.

Completely agree with you Kim

2 days ago I took the drastic decision to hide the AIBU topic completely as I had had enough. It has been great so far. My Active convos look so much more interesting all of a sudden.