To stop taking photos of anyone until someone takes one of me

[Pantone363]

I'm aware vanity is unattractive........but it would be nice to have a few candid unposed photos of myself.

I always seem to be the person taking photos at BBQs, parties, picnics etc therefore ending up with none of myself. I've asked DP before we've gone out and said oh would you mind taking some photos tonight, one blurry shot and he's done. The same with friends. We all went to a big party last night, before it started everyone's said oh let's get some nice photos, I took the pass code off my phone and left it on our table so nobody had any excuse not to take photos.

And again there is not one of me. I hate posed photos and selfies and actively handing my phone and asking for a photo because it comes off awkward.

I've woken up to two texts from friends asking to see/forward photos from last night to them and DP woke up 30 mins ago and wanted to see the photos. Looking through them you would have no idea I was even at the party!

AIBU to say 'oh sorry there aren't any something must have happened to my camera?!'

Next time on a night out say "I'm fed up of taking all the photos and never being in any so will not be taking any photos tonight. Lots of you have camera phones so it is someone else's turn tonight, who's volunteering?"

Yanbu, I've got hardly any of me and dh or me with the dc. I'm always the one who takes the photos, nobody else would think of it.

I get the same thing OP - always the one taking the pics and only get about 2 a year if lucky of me! I actively ask people to take some of DD and me together now as otherwise she won't have any of me at all!
Perhaps you could put the one of you caught in the mirror on FB and tag yourself - the rest got wiped somehow... Someone might get the hint?

It sounds as though the situation is well past hinting.

Yanbu, I'm always a bit sad looking though old photos as my DCs won't have any evidence of the fact that I was the main carer for them throughout their childhood, it's like I wasn't even there. I'm always the one taking photos, so very few of me unless I specifically asked XH to take some, when he would take one (usually chopping off my feet or head and catching me squinting/blinking/with 5 chins).

XH hated photos of himself and yet voluntarily ended up in loads more than me.

Current DP is a bit better at taking some of me without being asked, but again, he'll only take one, whereas I take loads of him and he checks them, deletes the unflattering ones and tries again if he's not happy with the selection (in fairness, he's a handsome man, but not photogenic at all!)

Now that DS is older and into photography I give him the role of official photographer on our trips and holidays. I still take some of him and we do timer shots to get us all in, but it means there will at least be some evidence of me being around so that when I die they will remember what I looked like!

Just say. 'Oh I'm not in. The mood for taking photos, you can do it instead'

Yes, hinting might be a bit pointless. It is fucking annoying though, especially if you don't go out much and get all dressed up and have nothing to show for it.

Yanbu.

Exactly the same issue here with family photos. Dh loves being the star but never thinks to take any of me unless I ask. Now my Dd is very keen on photography so it is a little easier. What is wrong with these men!

They are the main event, and we are the ones in the background. Usually 'doing' things...
I found a tripod in Poundland a couple of years ago and take this anywhere special now, can thoroughly recommend them

Not on nights out though!

YANBU if it matters to you then it matters.

I am just amazed at how much everyone wants their photo taking. I hate it when someone is prowling with a camera and I spend the whole night avoiding them or feeling uncomfortable. Spoils the night for me.

Same with me at DS2 birth.
Not a single one of me and DS.
But an Instagram ofy post birth tea and toast (home birth)!!

Your friends or who ever you go out with sound very selfish OP.

YANBU, fuck em.

YANBU at all. Same happens here, barely any photos of me since I was about 14. I do wonder how to bring it up with DP, when we 'met' our new niece last year there were photos of DP with baby, photos of ds with baby - any of me with baby? Were there buggery

The bit that gets me is, like you say, everyone wants to see the pics afterwards! If they weren't bothered about photos/being in photos I could completely understand it just being my preference/my thing to deal with but they want photos so why can't they do the teeny bit of maths and understand they should take some too??

Trouble is, like PP have said, if I mention I want a photo taking it's only done 'now' when I have to pose and look all awkward and crappy whereas I spend time catching people looking normal and so theirs look really nice (am not a good photographer or anything, just careful about what photos I take).

YANBU!

I have to order people to take pictures but you do feel really vain/awkward. I don't mind selfies at all though, I think the flip screen is a brilliant invention

Another one who has to ask to have her pics taken!!! I've gone beyond the 'shy', 'imply', etc, I just go: do you mind if you take a pic of us? Because I am not one for selfies and I do want my child/friends to look back and see I existed, sort of :)

How about we do this today? It is a beautiful day, we might be going out or just potter in the garden... Lets give the phones to the kids and say : take 5 pics of mummy when she's not looking. Oh, let daddy/x/granny etc show you how!

Why don't people like selfies? I've seen some lovely ones.

I have a rule in this house, every time we go for a day out I want at least one nice photo of me and the DCs. My DH doesn't mind taking a photo but genuinely doesn't think to take the camera off me. We also set the camera on timer a lot of the time and have a photo of all four of us.

I mentioned this to my mum today that there's no pictures of me, she said oh don't lose any sleep over it! I said but there'll be nothing for my kids or their kids to look back at. But obviously I'm being stupid and what does it matter.

Yanbu

I always take photos of DP without him realising or without them being too posey and he always mithers me to send them him, I also wouldn't feel comfortable asking him to take one of me but just for once I would like him to take one of me off his own back but he never does

Yanbu. Dm has one album containing photographs from a baby to 11 years of age. I have one secondary school photo aged 11/12 and then none until aged 18! Not one photo with a school friend/wearing a scrunchie/jumpsuit.

Dm just was not fussed about taking photos.

I have a special album for my dcs with with scan photos, day of birth photos and then on.

I have a special box with their first shoe, baby grow, tooth.

I have 2000 photos online that are clearly filed and can be shared with family around the world.

yanbu it's the same in our house. loads of photos of DH with DD but very few of me.
I feel quite sad reading this thread. Asking someone to take a photo of you isn't the same as them just doing it imo.

Same here. Can I suggest, if/when someone asks where the photos are, you reply "I don't know, did you take any?" A bit PA I know but it sounds like you've already tried asking nicely.

Sounds like everyone has become used to you being the photographer.

Have you actually said directly to your friends - I mean individually rather than a group thing/announcement which normally ends up with everyone assuming someone else will do it "I don't want to be the one taking all the photos because that means I am never in any. I'd like to see some photos where I am in them too. Why don't you take some, I would really appreciate that. Are you going to do that?" or something along those lines.