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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to not have 'guest' sanitary protection in bathroom?

999 replies

EasyCube · 29/05/2014 18:16

Long story short, a relatively new friend and teenage daughter visited I later received a text

'Thank you for having us, unfortunately you have caused xxx embarrassment as she could not find the guest tampons and had to come home with toilet paper in her underwear'

Confused

Is this a thing? I have never once thought before that I should have pads/tampons in the bathroom, easily accessed by guests

My mum was great and I loved her a lot but we never talked about periods (I bought my own stuff from pocket money/paper round money) and now I'm wondering if this is just another thing I was never told about and feel a bit stupid to be honest Sad

Does everyone else have things available in the bathroom for guests? I'm thinking about other bathrooms I've been in and can't say I've noticed this before?

OP posts:
ToysRLuv · 29/05/2014 22:57

Who lives, that should be!

LoveBeingInTheSun · 29/05/2014 23:03

FidelineandFumblin. Ffs it was a joke

FidelineandFumblin · 29/05/2014 23:04

What was?! Confused

PinkLemons · 29/05/2014 23:06

I have 3 bathrooms. Should all 3 be equipped? I take the mini pill so don't have periods but I do have San pro in my personal ensuite bathroom. If someone asked I would happily give them what they needed. I certainly don't have special "guest" San pro. There is a bin in every bathroom though! (Sounds posh but isn't really....)

FidelineandFumblin · 29/05/2014 23:06

Oh right - sorry Blush I just can't tell on this thread Confused

Ragwort · 29/05/2014 23:08

Guest contraception - surely no one provides this Hmm.

Although we were thrilled to be asked to be Godparents to our friends' daughter who was (allegedly) conceived in our spare bed Grin).

I haven't menstruated for over 10 years so haven't needed sanpro - should I be buying it for my guests Confused?

PinkLemons · 29/05/2014 23:08

Then again, my friends aren't posh. My friend had a bad stomach for ages due to medication and she would turn up and say "oh shit I need the loo" then I'd give her a choice of bathrooms, with or without window for ventilation Grin

ILoveCoreyHaim · 29/05/2014 23:18

I'm a bit bemused by the idea of keeping san pro in bedrooms TBH.

Why are you bemused. I have always kept them in my bedroom. Probably down to me being the only girl in a house full of brothers. I don't want boxes of tampax and lilet pads cluttering my bathroom cupboards or on the bathroom windowsill looking messy when they are used once a month unlike other stuff in the bathroom used daily/weekly.

Takes 2 secs to pop into the bedroom and grab a tampon. Maybe if I lived in a mansion with the bathroom at the other end of the house I might move them. As it is I have a tiny cupboard in a tiny bathroom and use the space for things I use daily/weekly.

FidelineandFumblin · 29/05/2014 23:20

Never heard of it Corey - at least not in adulthood. Sounds like a bit of a faff to be me, but each to her own.

ILoveCoreyHaim · 29/05/2014 23:27

Don't know that's where I have always kept them so probably habit. Dds are in her draw in her bedroom and DD2 will have her draw topped up when needed. I bulk buy them on BOGOF so last time had 10 packs of lilet teen pads which I just stuff in her top drawn and when the tampax are on BOGOF I do the same. Never gave it a second thought tbh and can't say I can remember going to friends or family and seeing boxes of stuff in their bathrooms

Next time I visit I'm going to have a good look to see if they are there

FidelineandFumblin · 29/05/2014 23:36

Next time I visit I'm going to have a good look to see if they are there

You and most of mumsnet Grin

WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeGoes · 29/05/2014 23:39

I keep mine in the bathroom, but it's in cupboards (I've got a Mirena coil and haven't had anything more than spotting for years, but had gynae surgery 18 months ago, so there are some leftover towels alongside the 7 year old tampons and pantyliners). I wouldn't mind if someone helped themselves or asked but I'm not going to leave them out as the bathroom is tiny and cluttered enough as it is with stuff we actually use.

Scousadelic · 29/05/2014 23:48

How peculiar! I would find it very odd to find a presentation basket of a range of products on display when visiting a friend. I now have a mental picture of one alongside a crocheted doll loo roll cover on a windowsill

cheepcheep · 29/05/2014 23:55

I thought that they came under the heading of personal hygiene products - with a heavy emphasis on the personal part. Maybe your friend should educate x to take care of her own issues and seek help when required. Alternatively you could supply all guests with directions to the nearest supermarket or chemist ;-)

gamescompendium · 30/05/2014 00:00

I might buy some guest mooncups

"Please rinse and return"

To be stored with the guest Tena Lady as well, for the more mature visitor.

starfishmummy · 30/05/2014 00:03

Our only loo is in its own little room. The only place to keep sanitary protection would he on the small windowsill with the harpic. Also due to the design and location, stuff on the windowsill gets wet when it rains.not a good place to put a box of tampax!!
(Also stuff from the windowsill has been known to go sailing out the window onto the roof of the back porch. From where it will end up by next doors back door)

ToysRLuv · 30/05/2014 00:06

Starfishmummy: If that was my loo, I'd put a hpok on the wall and gang a nice fabric bag from it, to put my sanpro in. But no need, if you don't use them, of course.

ToysRLuv · 30/05/2014 00:08

Wtf? "hpok" and "gang" are, obvs, hook and hang..

gorionine · 30/05/2014 00:09

starfishmummy
I can see the next thread for your NDN
"AIBU to let my neighbour know I thoroughly dislike picking up her guest tampons from my front lawn?"

VenusDeWillendorf · 30/05/2014 00:15

I always have a guest supply basket on the loo. Included in this are cotton balls, ear buds, a safety pin, an new toothbrush and San pro.

I thought everyone had these things to hand and in an obvious place, just in case someone needed them.

Not everyone's periods are regular, and I would hate to think that some guest had to go home with loo roll in her pants just because she started her period in my house.

It's not difficult to think of others, and put yourself in their place.

Maybe her text was a little bit rude, but I think a good host has polite and relaxed guests.

RedSoloCup · 30/05/2014 00:16

Never heard of such a thing although I will have to have 'stocks' when my three DD's are a bit older!!!

This took me back to working in pub days and I felt bad once as I was caught unawares and had to 'steal' a tampon from the owner's bathroom, I felt awful and was too embarrassed / didn't have the opportunity to tell her.

My point being I didn't think it my right to take the tampon but there was an open box on the side and I needed one. That's the only time I've ever seen this though and I would never expect 'guest' sanpro!

FatherSpodoKomodo · 30/05/2014 00:17

Text her back with "I hope she used the guest toilet paper."

It's only me in a house full of boys, though occasionally my DSD visits.

I keep my sanpro on the windowsill in the bathroom so if any rare guest wants to borrow one then I don't care, and wouldn't even notice. I don't use tampons anyway, so only maxi pads are to be found.

My DSD has bought her own sanpro with her since she started as a young teen, I think there's only been a couple of occasions she's asked me to buy her some. Glad her mum didn't send a text berating me for not already having some available for her. Or for not having a guest bathroom for her (in my dreams! My second bathroom is going to be a boy/man free zone!)

BuggersMuddle · 30/05/2014 00:22

Gosh OP YANBU.

I have visited houses where they clearly do communal or guest sanpro. I don't go our of my way to hide mine and they are in both our loos, but nor are they on a big shelf with a handy arrow iyswim.

If a friend took one, I probably wouldn't know, but I only keep my preference, which is non-applicator tampons for relatively light flow, so not what everyone wants / needs, plus maybe a few of those skinny pads for outside of periods not that I use them often but my mother's convinced every woman should .

If I visited a female friend I'd just ask her. A male friend, unlikely, unless they were seriously old friends and had a girlfriend who for some reason I couldn't ask (e.g. wasn't there). WTF is so embarrassing about it among other women?

FWIW I don't expect my mother to keep sanpro in now she's been through the menopause for a few years, nor MIL. DP knows I am a bit flaky with handbags, so I know for a fact they are part of his back up kit Grin because apparently (he's a first aider) you can do lots of useful things with highly absorbent tampons in an emergency, although so far his only emergency has been to pass them across to me when I've forgotten them Grin

mathanxiety · 30/05/2014 00:24

YABU not to keep tampons and pads in some place where guests can get them discreetly if they want to use them.

Friends of your DD are going to need tampons and pads when they come over and even 2.5 hours without one when you need one is a horrible thing to ask girls or women to put up with. Your DD should be able to direct her friends to the tampons and pads and should be able to get her own as needed without having to advertise to you or anyone else in the house that she has her period. No friend should have to approach you and ask for one.

I grew up in a home without a cupboard or bin in the bathroom and had to bring tampons and pads from bedroom to bathroom as needed, and then bring all used pads and tampons downstairs to the kitchen bin. Twas horrible imo, and embarrassing for my friends..

In my own homes I have always made sure there is a bathroom cupboard (there is normally room on the wall above the loo to put one up) and that tampons and pads are kept in stock there. I have four DDs and their friends are constantly over. DS has grown up with the knowledge that sanpro is kept where it can be reached easily. There is also a covered bin for disposing of used sanpro.

Would you keep the toilet paper locked away where guests had to ask for it? Women and girls use tampons and pads and imo it is rude not to provide them in the bathroom, and some place to dispose of them.

PetraArkanian · 30/05/2014 00:27

I have to say although I don't keep sanpro out now I probably will as soon as dd/friends reach the age they might need it...I hadn't really thought about it but I think I'd rather have a small selection on show just in case they need it! Yes they should carry their own but it doesn't hurt to have it clearly available for emergencies!

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