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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have complained that the level of customer service I receive should not depend on what Im wearing?

68 replies

Humansatnav · 25/05/2014 13:37

Garden centre close to my work with fab food hall. Usually pop in on my lunch hour ( professional job, smart office wear), and get some "naice" stuff for nibbles on a Monday.
With it being a bank holiday tomorrow dh & I decided to pop in just now & get the usual (organic wine, cheeses, olives etc). We'd been walking the dogs & I was still in my jeans/ trainers / fleecey jacket.
Staff have always been lovely before, but was served by a different man, he was fine with the lady before me, but very " off" with me, ie kept repeating the prices of the deli products to me several times, huffing and refused to give me a bag until I demanded one. It doesn't look much written down, but was very embarrassing.
I spoke to the supervisor immediately and she apologised. WIBU ?

OP posts:
KeepingUpAnon · 25/05/2014 13:40

YANBU to complain about bad service.

YABU to make the massive leap to thinking it must have been due to how you are dressed.

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 25/05/2014 13:41

What KeepingUpAnno said.

CoffeeTea103 · 25/05/2014 13:41

It's all in your head yabu.

FreeSpirit89 · 25/05/2014 13:42

Agree with keepup Also.

Original poster
Humansatnav · 25/05/2014 13:44

So why was the lady in front treated with the normal service level? Similar age to me, same local accent, spent a lot less.
Supervisor was lovely, but I see her every week, and when I explained what had happened she didn't seem surprised at all.........

OP posts:
LaurieFairyCake · 25/05/2014 13:46

I would also assume it's how I was dressed - I get shocking service when I'm dressed in my gardening clothes

It's so bad I come home and get changed if I have to go to posh town near me

In one expensive chocolate shop the assistant whispered that the chocolates were more than a pound each (a gift for a friend) - I'm sure it was because of my holey dress and gardening boots

fluffyraggies · 25/05/2014 13:47

The only way you could be sure it was because of your atire is by being served by staff who have served you before, smartly dressed, in a better way.

He may have know the woman in the queue before you and simply be a snotty git. It will be interesting to see how he is when he serves you in your usual smart gear. Although even then if he's nice it might be because he's had an ear bashing from his supervisor today.

Original poster
Humansatnav · 25/05/2014 13:49

Laurie , it was exactly like that " This Cheshire cheese is from a local farmer, so its much more expensive than supermarket cheese....." erm, yes thanks, I can read the price.
And he did it with Every.Single.Thing Angry

OP posts:
KeepingUpAnon · 25/05/2014 13:51

Supervisor was lovely, but I see her every week, and when I explained what had happened she didn't seem surprised at all

Supervisors in this situation wouldn't really be surprised...they'd usually purposefully keep a nonchalant expression and attitude when dealing with complaints they have no real idea of the validity of.

Who knows? Maybe you were just one too many customers to deal with in a really shit day? Maybe he didn't like your attitude or thought you gave him a shitty look? Maybe he knows the previous customer and makes an extra effort for regulars he recognises, and lets it slip for non-regs? Maybe he mistook you for his mothers neighbour June, who has previous for shoving dog shit through his mothers letterbox?

There are a million reasons that could be possible.

PoshPenny · 25/05/2014 13:51

I believe you, my sartorial standards go from one extreme to the other too, and I've had similar experiences in the past. when you next go in there dressed to the nines, why not make a point of being extra charming to this person who was so off towards you today, and remind him about him serving you last time when you were in your cacker gear. perhaps even comment in an oh so charming way about he must have been in a bad mood last time, he is so much more cheerful today... I'm sure you get my drift...

Original poster
Humansatnav · 25/05/2014 13:52

Fluffy my dh also suggested that, but he only works weekends ( supervisor said) . I suppose I could give it a go next weekend.

OP posts:
treaclesoda · 25/05/2014 14:08

I could well believe it. My dad, years ago, went into a car dealer to order a brand new car that he had settled on and had had a test drive in a few days earlier, when he was dressed in his 'normal' clothes. The day he went to order it, he was in work clothes (manual work) and the salesman didn't remember him and was quite off with him, telling him he thought he wasn't aware of how expensive it would be and maybe he should reconsider.

More fool him, as my dad was a cash buyer and took his business elsewhere. But yes, it does happen.

dawndonnaagain · 25/05/2014 14:35

I too believe you and have had the same thing happen in Waitrose.

Charlieboo30 · 25/05/2014 14:43

Have had the same thing happen in our local Booths (like a Northern Waitrose) and I want to bloody scream that my money is as good as anybody else's!

Surprisingly, my nana is a manager in a very up market independent supermarket/deli and I get treat wonderfully in there. Not sure if it's due to the family connection as I'm pretty sure not everyone would know.

paxtecum · 25/05/2014 14:45

I believe you.

I have heard similiar stories to Treacles about car sales persons.

You'd think any sales person wouldn't judge by appearances and treat all customers and potential customers with respect.

VitoCorleone · 25/05/2014 14:49

I believe you OP, sadly we do live in a world where people treat others differently depending on what they wear.

Coffeethrowtrampbitch · 25/05/2014 14:57

Happens to me often. I usually visit a large shopping centre close by during the week after walking the dog, and seldom look my best. I also visit at the weekends, and (sometimes) look smarter, and do notice a difference in the way some people in shops treat me.

Though if someone is treating you based upon how you are dressed it says more about them than it does about you, so don't let it upset you Smile

windchime · 25/05/2014 14:58

Because that is what the multi-billion pound fashion industry is all about - inner beauty just watched Devil Wears Prada again

Laquitar · 25/05/2014 15:02

But walking your dogs and doing gardening indicates more spending power than wearing office clothes.

I wear office clothes but i take packed lunch. Once in a moon i go to the shop next to the office and i drive themmad with 'how much this, how big is the portion' etc. They must hate me.

ADishBestEatenCold · 25/05/2014 15:23

" This Cheshire cheese is from a local farmer, so its much more expensive than supermarket cheese"

That sounds like he was giving you product information.
Unasked for I know, so he shouldn't have done, but it could be that he recognised the woman before you so knew she was already familiar with the products, but didn't recognise you and thought you might be new to the store and it's products ... so thought he was giving you a fuller level of service. Is that possible?

"huffing and refused to give me a bag until I demanded one"

Not sure what you mean by 'huffing', but did he actually refuse to give you a bag? As in you asked for one, he refused to give it and you had to demand one, as opposed to he failed to offer one and you had to ask?

If so, that would indeed be bad service.

Can't see what it would have to do with your clothes though, particularly at a garden centre.

SaucyJack · 25/05/2014 15:27

I also find it entirely believable.

HecatePropylaea · 25/05/2014 15:29

can I ask what you mean by refused to give you a bag until you demanded one?

Do you mean that you said can I have a bag please and he said no and you said I would like a bag and he said no and you said give me a bag right now and he said ok then

or do you mean that you had to ask for a bag?

regarding the clothes, I've had it happen to me too. Go somewhere in my scruffs and get treated like a time wasting pauper. Go somewhere dressed up and get treated like a valuable person. Telling you something is expensive feels like they are saying you are clearly too poor to afford this Grin

I think many people do assess others that way, sadly. It's one of those things you can't believe people actually do until it happens to you and then you are Shock I can't believe what just happened. Grin

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 25/05/2014 15:29

Isn't it fairly well lauded though that eccentric millionaires dress like complete scruffs? Gives rise to the 'never judge a book by its cover'...

Do you think it's possible OP that you were uncomfortable in your gardening gear (because you obviously think you would be treated differently based on appearances) and gave off a vibe about it, which the assistant picked up and incorrectly interpreted?

I also think that the supervisor was nonchalant; default position is to apologise, no more comment.

MyDogEatsBalloons · 25/05/2014 15:35

I'm a bit bemused that people wear smart clothes to a garden centre at the weekend anyway.

MiscellaneousAssortment · 25/05/2014 15:37

Vito yes it's sadly true.

[Imagine being disabled, and it's like you're person non grata many many places you go...]

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